我专程飞到纽约
I was... flown to New York
完成一例罕见而复杂的手术
to perform a rare and complicated surgery.
我和"丈夫"一起来了
I'm here with my "Husband,"
而且他还那么帅气那么善良
who is shockingly handsome and ever so kind.
这顿饭就是我的机会 我不知道
This dinner is a chance for me to -- I don't know.
向他们吹嘘 证明他们错了
Brag? Prove them wrong?
我
I...
我也不确定
I'm not sure.
我知道我必须得去
I'm just sure that I have to go,
而且如果你跟我一起去
and that, if you go with me,
我保证会以一种你特别喜欢
I will make it worth your while
特别有意思的方式回报你
in very creative ways that you will enjoy.
我们是在哪儿认识的
Where did we meet?
医院里
At the hospital.
我们在一起多久了
And how long have we been together?
几年了 但感觉像只有几分钟 因为爱让
Years, but it feels like minutes because love is so --
好啦 不需要这么诗意
Okay, we don't need poetry.
只是需要口径一致
We just need to keep our story straight.
我眼睛什么颜色
What color are my eyes?
你觉得他们还会拷问我你眼睛的颜色
You think they're gonna quiz me on the color of your eyes?
什么都有可能
Anything is possible.
有时候看上去是绿色
Sometimes they look green.
有时候是蓝色 取决于...
Sometimes they look blue, depending on the --
很好
Good.
欧文的爱好是什么
What is Owen's favorite pastime?
蓝调吉他
Blues guitar.
不是的
No.
不是的 是在电视上看二战电影
No, watching World War II movies on PBS.
蓝调吉他是我的爱好 南茜从没见过欧文
But blues guitar is mine, and Nancy's never met Owen,
所以为什么不能回答我的爱好呢
so can't I just answer as myself?
因为我不了解你 我只了解欧文
Well, I don't know your life. I know Owen's.
你现在可以学呀
You could learn it.
糟了 我们没戴戒指
Crap. We don't have rings!
我认识的医生一半都不戴戒指
Half the surgeons I know don't wear rings.
对 对
Right. Right.
我们是外科医生
We're surgeons.
我们都很聪明 不需要戒指
We're smart. No rings.
那些都是实话
All of that is actually true.
而且至少只是面对南茜
At least it's just Nancy.
而不是利兹 或者最可怕的凯瑟琳
Better her than Liz or -- God forbid -- Kathleen.
凯瑟琳太可怕了 凯瑟琳就像玛莎·斯图尔特
Kathleen is the worst. Kathleen's like Martha Stewart
如果玛莎·斯图尔特是心理医生
if Martha Stewart also had a license to diagnose you
并诊断你有人格障碍症
with a personality disorder.
南茜很蛮横 但她最体谅人
Nancy's bossy, but she's also the most forgiving.
而且她做的馅饼很好吃
And she does make a really nice pie.
加上 她肯定会爱上你
Plus, she is gonna love you.
我说的你
And by you,
是指欧文 喜欢
I mean Owen, who really likes to...
看二战电影的欧文
Watch World War II movies.
谢谢
Thank you.
你肯定会表现得很棒的
You're gonna be great!
另外 你不能喝酒
Also, you can't drink.
-欧文不喝酒 -他喝酒
- Owen doesn't drink. - He does.
我只是不想你喝酒误事
I just don't want you to screw anything up.
这个地方很豪华呀
This is quite a place.
她丈夫是个投资银行家
Ah, her husband's an investment banker.
他升高♥官♥后 他们从康涅狄格州的大宅
They moved here from a different giant house in Connecticut
搬到了这里
after he got some big promotion.
等下
Wait.
我们从未度过蜜月 欧文和我
We never had a honeymoon -- Owen and I.
他想去墨西哥 我想去巴黎
He wanted Mexico, I wanted Paris,
所以我们都没去
so we did neither.
你们没有两个地方都去
Instead of doing both?
知道了 知道了
Got it. Got it.
决不妥协 即使在蜜月问题上
No compromises, even on the honeymoon.
这是个糟糕的主意
This is a terrible idea.
你现在才觉得糟糕吗
Now you figure that out?
你们来了
You made it.
-我们来了 -快进来吧
- We did. - Come on in.
家里一团糟
The house is a mess.
别太仔细看
Don't look too close.
你们来得正好
You're right on time.
我们刚开始上开胃菜
We were just about to start on the appetizers.
-我们 -开瓶器在哪里
- We? - Where do you keep your corkscrew?
我们得在她来之前找到
We got to get it in before she gets here.
这是 听起来像
Is that -- That sounds like --
凯瑟琳 你也在这儿呀
Kathleen! You're here!
凯瑟琳是我的
Kathleen is my --
另外一个姐姐
Other sister.
没错
Yep.
那我把酒收起来吧
Well, I guess I'll put the wine away.
-如果你知道你就不会来了 -是的
- You wouldn't have come if you knew. - No!
这么有趣 家庭聚会
Fun! Family reunion!
下一个出现的是利兹还是妈妈
Is, uh, Liz gonna pop out of the closet next? Or Mom?
你别这样想我
Please give me more credit than that.
我不会把妈妈也叫来的
I wouldn't just spring Mom on you.
我的确给利兹打了电♥话♥ 但她出城了
I did call Liz, but she was out of town.
太不凑巧了
Ah, too bad.
我们本可以相互攀比确保你的生活依然最好
We could've all compared lives to make sure yours are still better.
根本不是这样
It's not like that at all.
南茜只是抑制不住修复我们关系的冲动
No. This is about Nancy's compulsive need to fix all of us.
我们是一家人
We are a family.
我们已经很多年没见了
We haven't seen each other in years.
你都没见过欧文
You haven't even met Owen.
今晚大家都友好一点好吗
I'm sure we can all be civil for one night.
-凯瑟琳 -欧文
- Kathleen. - Owen.
你之前当过兵是吗
You were in the Army, right?
在哪驻扎
Uh, where were you stationed?
伊♥拉♥克♥ 巴格达
Iraq. Baghdad.
我老公正在那里旅行呢
My husband's traveling there.
他是个外交官
H-He's a diplomat.
有什么旅行建议吗
Any recommendations?
先进屋再审问他吧
Let's move inside before we start the interrogation.
那里的阿巴斯宫很漂亮
The Abbasid Palace is quite beautiful.
建于12世纪
It was, uh, built in the 12th century
坐落在底格里斯河畔
overlooking the Tigris River.
回头我告诉他
I'll mention it.
那里七月的气温能达到多少度
H-How high does the temperature get there in July?
会变得...很热
It gets, uh, pretty hot.
不好意思 我能去一下洗手间吗
Um, I'm sorry. Could I use your restroom?
-当然 -我带你去
- Of course. - Yeah, I'll show you where.
她们只需要五分钟
It's gonna take them about five minutes
就能戳穿我不是欧文
to figure out I'm not Owen.
你知道伊♥拉♥克♥的那个宫殿
You knew about that palace in Iraq.
九年级世界文明课上的作业展示
Ninth grade World Civ presentation!
我就只记得这些了
That's about all I remember.
我能勉强应付南茜
I-I might've been able to handle Nancy,
但那个玛莎·斯图尔特 她可不好骗
but that Martha Stewart one, she's got teeth.
你说的对 我们得赶紧离开
Okay. You're right. We got to get out of here.
今晚最好的结果也就是
I mean, best case scenario, the whole night's
她们不断提醒我是这个家的害群之马
just them reminding me that I'm the Shepherd's black sheep.
-我看到你做的事了 -那是我高中时
- I see what you did there. - That was the nickname
她们给我起的外号♥
that they gave me in high school.
害群之马
Black Sheep.
我们都不是含蓄之人
We are not subtle people.
我们要怎么办
What are we gonna do?
我们先出去待几分钟
We're gonna go back out there for a few minutes.
然后就说接到了医院的电♥话♥
We're gonna say we got paged to the hospital.
因为我们已经不是高中生了
Because we are not in high school.
而是需要处理医疗紧急事故的成年人
We are grown-ass surgeons with medical emergencies.
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