实习医生格蕾

Grey's Anatomy S15E11

Part 2 Jan. 25, 2020, 11:56 a.m.

有好多想说的我
There's so much to say, I-I...
我不知道说什么
I don't know what to say.
我来并不是为了说什么
I didn't come here to say anything
或者听你对我说什么所以
or to hear you say anything to me, so...
如果可以的话一起坐坐就好
we can just sit, if that's okay.
行
Okay.
妈妈
Mom.
我在到处找你呢
I was looking for you.
你知道这段时间我让艾米丽娅和卡洛西科过得不好
You know I give Amelia and Koracick a hard time,
但他们已经是最好的医生了
but they're the best.
我在想我的第一台手术
I was thinking about my first surgery.
第一次将手术刀握在手上的那一刻
The very first time I held a scalpel in my hand.
那是一台非常简单的脂肪瘤但我却很害怕
It was a simple lipoma, but I was terrified.
嗯
Hmm.
我以为自己内心会很强大所向披靡
I expected to feel so powerful, invincible.
但手术室的护士将那把10号♥手术刀
But the second that scrub nurse
递给我的时候
put that 10 blade in my hand,
我的心是冰凉的
I went ice cold.
那后来你是怎么做的
Okay, so then what did you do?
戴安娜·罗斯上世纪60-80年代风靡全球的黑人女歌♥手迈克尔·杰克逊的良师益友
戴安娜·罗斯的那首“爱比山高”
Diana Ross. - "Ain't No Mountain High Enough."
我第一次听那首歌♥的时候
The first time I heard that song,
内心有说不出的满足与冷静
it just filled me with joy and such calm...
于是我就唱了出来
so I just sang it
一遍又一遍在我的脑海里在那间手术室里
over and over and over in my head, in that O.R.,
直到同样的冷静与满足再次充满我的身体
until that same sense of calm and joy washed over me.
从那时起这就是我
And it's been my secret weapon
面对所有令我害怕的事物的秘密武器
for everything that's ever scared me --
我的第一台手术
my first surgery.
生产你的时候脑海中无限循环
Labor with you, it was on an endless loop.
每一次PET扫描每一次核磁共振
Every PET scan, every MRI.
我还记得我在做作业时
I remember you singing that song in the kitchen
你在厨房♥里哼这首歌♥
when I was doing my homework.
你还嫌弃那是老人家听的音乐呢
You told me it was old people music.
你想听迈克尔·杰克逊
You wanted Michael Jackson.
我爱我的迈克尔
I love me some Michael.
红衣是迈克尔传奇Thriller的mv中的造型当年风靡全球
每天晚上我得把那件红皮衣从你身上
I had to pry that - red leather jacket off of you
-拔下来才能让你上♥床♥睡觉 -这是真的
-to get you to go to bed at night. -Ah, that's true.
我想我过去也是这样做的
I guess I used to do the same thing.
第一台手术我在脑海里唱了一首歌♥
My first surgery, I sang a song in my head.
-它在呼唤我你知道吗 -我知道
-I mean, it calmed me, you know? -I know.
当时我看着你呢
I watched you.
我第一台你怎么看的
My first -- How did you watch?
孩子拜托我可是凯瑟琳·福克斯
Child, please. I am Catherine Fox.
你觉得我怎么可能会
Do you think there's a world
不偷偷地溜进观摩室
where I wouldn't sneak into the gallery
去看看我的宝贝的第一台手术
of my baby's first surgery?
你的手术就像场表演
Oh, you were a sight to see...
我赌哈瑞特以后也会这么做
I bet Harriet does the same thing someday.
那到时候我就和你一块儿溜进观摩室
Well, I'll be sneaking up into the gallery with you, then.
一言为定
Deal.
一言为定
That's a deal.
现在可以进手术室了吗
Now, can we please get you to your room?
还不行
Not yet.
妈妈
Mom...
我把基金会转到你名下了
I left the foundation in your name,
防止有什么意外发生
just in case anything happens to me.
塞西莉亚会管理基金会的日常工作
Cecilia runs the day-to-day operations,
查理负责账目
Charlie keeps the books humming,
但他们需要一个领导者一颗北极星
but they'll need a leader, a North Star.
假如我完全瘫痪了
And in the event that I'm left totally paralyzed --
妈就算你不能做手术
Mom, even if you can't operate,
你还是得管理基金会好吗
you're still gonna run the foundation, okay?
你可以教书
You'll teach.
你是凯瑟琳·福克斯你还能干什么
You're Catherine Fox. What are you gonna do?
你会掺和我和所有人的事
You're gonna be all up in my business and everybody else's.
我们都知道你肯定会找到方法的
We both know you're gonna find a way to do that.
-留着吧 -翻页
- Keep this. - Turn the page.
-我已经 -翻页
- I've already -- - Turn the page.
你策划了自己的派对
You planned your own party?
妈
Mom.
如果我能活着出来我们就能举杯狂欢
If I get out of this alive, the fun we're gonna have --
你可别想拿走那些蛋卷
and don't you even think about scrimping on those egg rolls.
你知道那是我的最爱
You know they're my favorite.
你真的计划了一切
You really planned everything.
我向来如此
I always do.
那好吧
All right, then.
我们走吧
Shall we?
津巴布韦的维多利亚瀑布
Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe.
菲利普为了我把这些摆地到处都是
Phillip put these everywhere for me.
他说这能让我得以慰藉
He said it's supposed to be soothing.
但说实话
Truth be told,
只让我更加想念那里
it just makes me miss it more.
几年前一个学生告诉我
A few years back, a student told me about
他花了一个学期在国外建造学校
a semester he took abroad building schools.
莱西走了我就想自己可以
Lexie was gone, and I thought I could either
借威士忌消化我的悲伤
drown my grief in a bottle of Scotch
或干点什么所以我选了后者
or do something. So I did something.
在津巴布韦
In Zimbabwe.
那些日落梅瑞狄斯还有宁静
The sunsets, Meredith... and the quiet.
我遇见的人对生活都充满热情
The people that I met, they have this passion for life,
友爱好学
loving, learning...
然后你病了
And then you got sick.
我想我就先回家
I thought I'd just come home,
接受需要的治疗
do whatever treatment I needed to do,
然后再回去但是回家挺好的
and then go back, but... It was good. Coming home.
给我一个机会这是个正确的决定
It gave me a chance to -- It was the right thing to do.
你去了那里获得了全新的生活
You went and got a whole new life.
没错
I did.
我为你感到高兴
I'm glad for you.
我很高兴你看到了日落
I'm glad you saw sunsets
为那些有需要的人建立了学校还留了下来
and built schools for people who needed them and you stayed sober.
你去了那里获得了全新的生活
You went and got a whole new life.
这一次隔了大半个地球
Halfway across the world this time.
但你一点也不在乎
But you didn't give a damn
你抛在背后的人
about the people you left behind.
再说一次
Say it again.
我们从脊椎C3处到胸椎T4处开个切口
We make an incision posteriorly from C3 to T4,
然后用探测仪
and then use the stealth probe
标记肿瘤的坐标
to mark the coordinates of the tumor.
然后实施部分椎板切除术
And then do partial laminectomies
为暴露肿瘤并全部切除
to access the tumor and remove it en bloc.
完美聪明绝顶
Perfect. Brilliant.
我们实在太棒了
We are incredible.
真该有人来采访我们
Someone should really do a study on us.
好吧说吧
Okay, say it.
什么不不
What? Wh-- Oh. No.
我没事
Ha ha! I'm good.
好好好我是大人物
Good, good, good, good. Big Gun.
准备好以大人物的风范切除这个肿瘤
Ready to Big Gun the crap out of this tumor.
该死
Damn it.
-我的嚣张气焰都灭了 -对吧
- Even my arrogance is off. - Right?
对
Right.
那不如我们试试你的方法
W-What if we try, uh, your thing?
你懂的就是那个说一堆话表达感情
You know, the -- the word-vomit and the feelings?
那看起来对你挺管用
That seems to work. For you.
好的
Okay.
你你先来
You -- you first.
这是我见过最大的肿瘤
This is the largest tumor I've ever seen
还长在我认识的最牛逼的医生身上
on the biggest legend I've ever known,