识骨寻踪（2005）
Bones S08E08
Part 5
Nov. 8, 2020, 7:15 p.m.
aka the Madagascar hissing cockroach.
也就是马达加斯加嘶嘶蟑螂更能吃的了
So, this victim, did you ever hear of him?
这个受害人 你听说过吗
He was a popular comic.
他是个著名的喜剧演员
Sure sign you've transgressed the unwritten rule of comedy.
不过显然你得无视喜剧演员的不成文规定
I thought the only rule in comedy was to be funny.
我以为喜剧演员唯一的规定就是搞笑呢
Tragically, you're not the only one who thinks that way.
悲哀的是 不止一个人有你这种想法
Well, if you ask me,
要我说
it gets no better than the Stooges.
他们比臭皮匠也好不了多少
Unfettered psychopathic violence!
解放的精神病暴♥力♥
Hilarious, right?
超有趣的吧
Not really, when you put it that way.
并非如此 如果你非得这么理解
Might I recommend, next time,
我建议你 下一次
watching with the volume turned off?
看的时候不要听声音
The absence of the cartoon sound effects
去掉那些卡♥通♥音效的话
makes it much more violent.
他们的表演就显得更暴♥力♥了
Yeah, I know Morgan Donnelly.
是 我认识摩根·唐纳利
Uh, you going to order a drink, or what?
你们要点杯饮料吗
Yeah, we'll have some water.
喝水就好
Must be tough on a guy like you, huh?
像你这样的人做这种事肯定很难受吧
Serving drinks,
边给人端饮料
has to watch other comedians on stage do their thing...
边被迫看着别的喜剧演员上台表演
Are you kidding?
你在开玩笑吗
That's like telling a Jew
就好像在告诉犹太人说
he doesn't want to be in Mecca.
他不希望降生在麦加
In point of fact, Mecca is the center of the Muslim world.
事实上 麦加是穆♥斯♥林♥世界的中心
It would be completely rational
一个犹太人不想呆在麦加
for a Jew to avoid Mecca.
是完全合乎理性的想法
Especially during hajj.
尤其是在朝圣的季节
Yeah, I'm fine.
嗯 我没事
So... okay?
好吗
Morgan Donnelly's dead.
摩根·唐纳利死了
Yeah, I heard that.
我听说了
It's terrible.
真糟糕
Is it true that he once told you,
他是不是曾经有一次
in front of a crowd,
在一大群人面前跟你说
that if he wanted to hear from an ass, he would have farted?
如果他想听废人说话 他就会放屁
Yeah.
是的
He did say that.
他是这么说过
He got a huge laugh, too.
他也得到了一阵大笑
We have proof that he humiliated you
我们有证据证明 他在观众面前
at least 20 times in front of audiences.
至少侮辱过你二十次
What?
什么
I get it.
我懂了
No, that wasn't a joke.
我们不是在开玩笑
I know it wasn't a joke.
我知道你们没在开玩笑
I know what is a joke and what isn't a joke.
我能分清玩笑和严肃的话
I'm not sure you do.
我怎么不太相信
Now, don't heckle him, Bones.
别起哄他 骨头
He might want to kill you next.
他搞不好下次会来杀你的
Oh, you got it all wrong.
你们完全搞错了
Look, me and Morgan...
我和摩根
it was a setup.
是计划好的
Setup? He wanted you to heckle him?
计划好的 他希望你去给他起哄
Definitely!
当然
Definitely.
当然
All those lines that he used on me?
他在我身上用的那些台词
You know, like the fart one?
就比如放屁一号♥
Or he's say, um...
还有什么
"There's an alcoholic who should stay anonymous."
"这儿有个酒鬼 他就该默默无闻"
I wrote all those.
这些都是我写的
Why?
为什么呢
It was my way of, uh, getting laughs.
这就是我收获笑声的方式
Bonus, it made the audience like Morgan, you know,
这样观众也会喜欢摩根
so it's a... it's a win-win situation.
所以这是个...双赢的状况
Right. Well, thanks for your cooperation. Come on.
好吧 谢谢你的合作 走吧
Booth. Yeah?
布斯 怎么了
The man in this flyer
这张传♥单♥上的人
has a fake arrow through his head.
脑袋上插了一支假箭呢
Oh. Yeah.
是啊
That's Rex.
那人是雷克斯
And let me tell you,
我跟你们说
now that Donnelly is gone,
既然现在唐纳利已经死了
he's gonna get the Friday night slot, so...
他就会接替周五晚上的位置
that's got to make you suspicious, right?
所以你们觉得他有点可疑吧
You comedians really stick together, huh?
你们这些喜剧演员还真团结啊
This could very well be the murder weapon.
这很有可能就是凶器
Where's Rex now?
雷克斯现在在哪儿
Uh, he's warming up.
他在热身
Where's your arrow through the head?
你横穿头部的箭到哪儿去了
Somebody stole it.
有人偷走了
I never thought to report it directly to the FBI.
我没想到这件小事还得报告给联邦调查局
Who stole it?
谁偷的
Could've been anyone.
谁都有可能
That bit is classic.
经典的台词吧
I think... I think so, too.
我也这么觉得
It is funny.
很好笑
But my prime suspect: a so-called comic,
但我的首要嫌疑人是所谓的喜剧演员
so-called Morgan Donnelly.
所谓的摩根·唐纳利
Okay, why do you think he stole it?
为什么你认为是他偷的
Guy's a natural thief--
那家伙天生就是贼
props, jokes, women.
偷道具 偷笑话桥段 偷女人
He steals it all.
他全都偷
He's dead.
他死了
Murdered.
被谋杀的
Sorry to say, that was bound to happen.
不得不说 这是肯定会发生的
You really do hate this guy, huh?
你可真是恨这家伙啊
Both personally and professionally, yes.
从个人角度和职业角度都是
Rex's mallet tested positive for blood.
雷克斯木槌的血液检测呈阳性
Positive for what?
什么呈阳性
Blood.
血液检测
Now, that's funny.
现在可好玩了
Yes, I kissed him.
是的 我是亲了他
Why?
为什么
It wasn't a you-me kind of kiss.
这和你我之间的吻不一样
This was a musty old auntie kiss.
这是老阿姨对小伙子的吻
Yeah? Well, your musty old auntie kiss
是吗 你这老阿姨的一吻
is the best kiss that kid ever got.
是那孩子得到过的最好的吻了
Why are you being jealous?
你干嘛这么吃醋
Because he's... cool.
因为他很...酷
You know?
你明白吗
And I'm... not.
而且我一点不酷
And, I don't know, if you ever leave me,
而且如果你会离开我
it's gonna be for someone who's cool.
肯定是因为某个很酷的人
"Cool" isn't really a thing anymore.
现在已经不流行说"酷"了
Thank you for proving my point.
多谢证明我的观点
You still haven't told me why you kissed him.
你还是没告诉我为什么要亲他
Yeah, I...
是啊 我...
I promised him I wasn't gonna tell anybody, and...
我答应他不会告诉任何人
I will tell you, though,
不过我会告诉你
because you are not just anybody.
因为你不是其他人
I kissed him because
我亲他是因为
he's a great artist.
他是一位了不起的画家
And his art is changing the world.
他的作品改变了世界
He's Zed.
他是泽德
Well, it's hard to argue with that.
既然是这样那我也没话可说了
You know what he said about my work?
你知道他怎么评价我的作品吗
He said that I have...
他说我有
"Excellent technique."
"出色的画技"
Well, that's great.
那很好啊
No. No, honey, it's not great.
不 亲爱的 一点都不好
识骨寻踪（2005）
Bones
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