绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S02E21

Part 5 May 22, 2024, 10:07 p.m.

Mom, the... the door's locked.
我知道
I know.
妈你现在得打开这扇门！
Mom, you need to open this door right now!
妈！
Mom!
甜心你为什么还没穿好衣服？
Honey, why aren't you dressed yet?
我们得去妇产科门诊
We have to be at the fertility clinic
在40分钟内! aw 惨了! 是今天吗？
in 40 minutes! Aw, shoot! Is that today?
还有 uh 说说萧梅
And, uh, give xiao-Mei a kick in the pants.
我整个早上都没见到她了
I haven't seen her all morning.
嘿
Hey.
今天是个重要的日子
Today's the, uh, big day.
你准备好了没 uh 要生个小孩了？
You ready to, uh, make a baby?
准备好了
Ready.
请吧...
Please...
要绅士点
Be gentle.
甜心快点我们要迟到了
Honey, come on. We're gonna be late.
Hmm, uh...
我认为她搞糊涂了
I think she's confused
关于我们要生个孩子的事情
as to how we're gonna make this baby happen.
oh 你正准备把她放平吗？
Oh. And were you planning on setting her straight?
我正准备说下一句
Next thing out of my mouth.
快! 这个家伙快要被激发了
Come on! The guy's ready to explode.
我不关心我不和我妈的男友睡
I don't care. I'm not sleeping with mom's boyfriend.
你不能收手不干那晚你很棒
You can't back out now. You were great the other night.
你已经勾引了彼得他被你钓住了他脑子一团糟了
You got Peter on the hook. He's primed. I was just messing with his head
报复母亲那已经足够了
to get back at mom. That's all.
是的但为什么要停在那儿呢? 她让你不和马修见面
Yeah, but why stop there? She's keeping you from Matthew.
现在来吧这是她应受的
Now, come on, she deserves this.
我并不愚蠢想想你自己的办法吧
I'm not that stupid. Go grind your own ax.
是他对这个家伙我没时间想些其他的了
That's him. I don't have time for this crap.
现在快脱掉你的胸罩和内♥裤♥ 滚出我的房♥间你这个神经病！
Now strip down to your bra and panties now. Get out of my room, you psycho!
um 我妈要些时候才能回来了
Um, my mom won't be back for a while,
所以你大概不大想等吧 well 没事的
so you probably don't wanna wait around. Well, that's okay.
我只是想确保你拿到了perkins的目录
I just wanted to make sure you got the Perkins catalog.
uh 你母亲告诉我你准备明天去那里转转
Uh, your mom told me that you're going on a tour there tomorrow.
是的你会喜欢上它的
Yeah. You're gonna love it.
校园很美老师令人惊讶
The campus is beautiful, the teachers are amazing,
学生的身体就是个巨大的混合体
and the student body is such a great mix.
你知道他们是多种多样的
You know, they're all about diversity.
无论怎么样
Whatever.
好 well 我会让我妈知道你来过的
All right, well, I'll let my mom know you stopped by.
Okay.
安德鲁... (清清喉咙) 我也想说声抱歉
Andrew... I also wanted to apologize
那晚匆匆离开了
for leaving so fast the other night.
我... (咯咯地笑)
I...
我开始感觉到
I started to get the feeling
你的姐姐对我有些好感
that your sister was coming on to me,
那个让人感到有些不安因为--
which was upsetting because...
你是个性上瘾者？
You're a sex addict?
你的母亲和你们说过了？
Your mom told you about that?
让我们开门见山的说吧
Let's just say the word's out.
但我很好奇
But, um, I'm curious.
回到过去你都参加过怎么样的活动？
Back in the day, what kind of stuff were you into?
我不知道我是不是要谈这个话题
I don't know that I wanna talk about that.
well 我只是想确认下
Well, I just wanna make sure
并不是任何事都让你变的不正常
you're not into anything too freaky.
我的意思是
You know, I mean,
你在和我母亲约会我要保护好她
you are dating my mom, and I'm kinda protective of her.
你可以放心
Well, you can relax.
我的意思是我并不反常你知道的
I mean, I wasn't some sort of pervert, you know.
我能说的是... 我曾经度过一段黑暗的日子
All I can say is... I went through a dark period,
我同不少人发生了关系
and I slept with a whole lot of people.
人？
People?
有错吗？
What's wrong?
不只是很多人说他们的战利品时
No, it's just that when most guys discuss their conquests,
他们并不是说"人"
they don't say "people."
(笑) 哦...
Oh, well...
不没事的
No, it's okay.
我赞赏你对事实的评价...
I appreciate the fact that you value...
多种多样的
Diversity.
(苏珊) 是谁? 麦克
Who is it? Mike.
苏珊？
Susan?
嗨对不起
Hi. Sorry.
我只是在防着伊迪
I'm just on the lookout for Edie.
你可以放心伊迪不会来找你了
Oh, well, you can relax. Edie won't be coming after you.
为什么? 我同那个侦探谈过了而他不会对她说出关于你的任何事了
Why? I talked to the p.I., and he's not gonna tell her anything.
你对他说了什么？
What did you say?
我给了他钱所以一切都结束了
I paid him off, so it's over.
我只是想到你应该知道
I just thought you should know.
等等
Well, wait.
你为什么要那么做？
Why would you do that?
如果这件事泄漏出去肯定会有人要受伤的
People will just get hurt if it gets out.
我不想看到这个发生
I didn't see the point.
呃... 噢..
Uh... oh...
快快快
Come on, come on, come on.
嘿那个你看上去很渴的样子
Hey there. You look thirsty.
你很体贴人梅尔女士
This is really nice of you, Mrs. Mayer.
诚实地说吧我过去不知道你喜欢我
To be honest with you, I wasn't even sure that you liked me.
你知道为什么吗? 因为我们都很忙啊
And you know why? Because we're all so busy
除了我们之间的分离你每天都在我的房♥间里
and detached from each other. You're at my house every day,
当然我们挥手示意并说“你好”
and sure, we wave and we say hello,
但我们几乎不了解对方
but we barely even know each other.
你何时开始投递我的邮件的呢？
How long have you been delivering my mail,
为了上帝的名义? 三周半前
for god's sake? Three and a half weeks.
真的吗？
Really?
似乎感觉一直是你 (笑)
It seems like forever.
让我帮你倒完吧
Let me top you off.
噢不不必了这已经是我的第三杯了我...
Oh, no, I couldn't. This is my third glass. I...
认真的讲我已经很喝了很多了
Seriously, I'm sloshin'.
well 估计你要用洗手间了
Well, you probably wanna use the bathroom
在你离开前 huh？
before you leave, huh?
不我很好你确定吗？
No, I'm good. Are you sure?
uh 我的意思是你还要走不少路
Uh, I mean, you have such a long route,
而那些冰茶快要到头了
and that ice tea's gonna go right through ya.
这儿要比麦克柯琅斯基夫人家的八仙花好多了吧
It's better here than Mrs. McCluskey's hydrangeas.
你知道呃... 我可能要用下你的洗手间了
Well, you know, uh... Maybe I will use your bathroom.
好! 楼下的那间坏了
Great! Oh, the one down here is broken.
你为什么不用下楼上的那个？
Why don't you use the one upstairs?
它正好在我卧室的右边
It's right off my bedroom.
好
Yeah.
Okay.
明白 (拍拍桌子)
Got it.
(低声) 我仍然不能相信这个
I still can't believe it.
我的意思是为什么萧梅
I mean, why would xiao-Mei
要像那样把她自己献给我？
just offer herself up to me like that?
(耳语) well 甜心她是个处♥女♥
Well, honey, she's a virgin.
谁知道一个处♥女♥会干什么事？
Who knows why virgins do anything?
她是个处♥女♥？
She's a virgin?
你是认真的吗？
Are you serious?
是的我不会无理由的抨击她的
Yeah. I wouldn't just slam her for no reason.
索利斯先生？
Mr. Solis?
是时候收集你的DNA了
It's time to collect your d.N.A.
哦！甜心现在只要好的游泳者了
Oh! Okay, honey, only good swimmers now.
如果你喜欢
If you like,
我们很多种杂♥志♥和录影带
we have a variety of magazines and videos available.
我觉得我不用
Mm... I think I'm good.
格斯? 你在上面好吗？
Gus? Are you okay up there?
(气吁吁地说) 格斯！
Gus!
呃你想要我带上帽子吗？
Uh, do you want me to keep the hat on?
我认为对于一些女性来说这是幻想
I know it's a fantasy for some women.
呃...
Uh...
妈？
Mom?