绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S02E14

Part 5 May 22, 2024, 10:07 p.m.

站在风车前
in front of a windmill, the whole shebang.
但除非我能做这个手术否则我的脾脏
But unless I get this surgery, my spleen is going to slam
会撞到心脏然后一起爆♥炸♥
straight into my heart and explode.
你知道我看起来是个好人
So, you know, seeing as I am just a nice person
我一直都支持同性恋的权利让我们结婚吧
and I always support gay rights, let's just do this.
我有了丈夫就有了医疗保险
And then I'll have a husband and insurance.
没有人会受伤害
Nobody gets hurt.
史蒂芬史蒂芬
Steven, why... Steven!
他有点...
It's just...
是啊
Yeah.
我很抱歉我不能
I'm so sorry. My hands are tied.
我真的很抱歉
I'm really sorry.
史蒂芬等等史蒂芬
Steven, wait. Steven...
你去哪里你去哪里
Where are you going? What are you doing?
♪ 哦哦哦♪
♪ oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ 爱和它有什么关系？♪
♪ What's love got to do, got to do with it? ♪
音响终于能开了
Ah, finally got the sound system working.
♪ 除了二手的感情什么是爱？♪
♪ What's love but a secondhand emotion? ♪
新郎呢？
Where's the groom?
♪ 爱和它有什么关系？♪
♪ What's love got to do, got to do with it? ♪
嗨苏姗
Hey, susie q.
怎么了？
What's wrong?
作为新娘你看上去不太高兴啊
For a newlywed, you don't have much spring in your step.
我没结婚
I didn't get married.
真的？
Really?
我们到了礼堂
We got to the altar,
但这场假婚礼有始无终
but the whole fake wedding thing sort of imploded.
哦我很抱歉
Wow. I'm sorry.
我还是没有保险
I still don't have insurance.
我得做那个手术
I need to get that operation.
我
I'm...
糟透了
I'm really screwed.
那么
Well...
我们干嘛不结婚？
Why don't I just marry you?
什么? 我有很棒的医疗计划
What? I've got a fantastic health plan.
你马上就能享受
You'd be covered instantly.
但我们离婚了
But... we were actually married.
听着苏姗和你离婚
Look, susie, I've always felt awful
我一直觉得对你不起
about walking out on you the way I did.
如果我们这次结婚
And I figure, if we do this,
我至少能救你的命
I'd basically be saving your life.
我想我欠你的
I figure I owe you one.
卡尔
Karl...
你答应吗？
So what do you say?
嫁给我好吗？
Will you marry me, Susan Mayer?
再一次
Again?
为什么不行？
What the hell?
酷！
Cool!
要告诉伊迪吗？
What are we gonna do about Edie?
不能告诉她她会杀了我们
We can't tell her. She'd kill us both.
这是我们的小秘密
Yeah, it'll be our little secret.
很高兴你能做我们的客人
We've really enjoyed having you as a guest.
对吧加布？
Right, Gaby?
当然
Absolutely.
萧梅你是个很特别的女孩
Xiao-Mei, you are a very special girl,
一路保重好吗？
so... So you take care, okay?
哦
Oh!
谢谢你们的帮忙卡洛斯
Thanks for all your help, Carlos.
神父我很荣幸
My pleasure, father.
再见女士们...
Bye-bye. Ladies?
别告诉我你在哭
Please don't tell me you're crying
就因为得不到想要的女佣
just because you can't have the maid you want.
卡洛斯她可不仅仅会是个女佣
Carlos, she wouldn't have been just a maid.
她会变成最好的女佣
She would have been the best damn maid ever.
上帝你太夸张了
God, you're pathetic.
闭嘴
Shut up.
嘿有什么不对
Hey, something's going on.
克劳利神父
Father crowley...
萧梅萧梅
Xiao-Mei, xiao-Mei...
有什么问题吗？
Is there a problem?
萧梅不想回中国
Well, xiao-Mei doesn't want to go back to China.
她想住在这里为你们工作
She wants to stay here and work for you.
什么？为什么？
What? Why?
她说索利斯夫人对她太好了
She says Mrs. Solis treated her with more kindness than she's ever known.
她现在把你们当作家人
She now thinks of you two as family.
真的？
Oh, really?
你当然能留下
Oh, of course you can stay!
哦
Oh!
加布
Gaby...
卡洛斯她把我们当做家人！
Carlos, she thinks of us as family.
我要听农场鲜肉的新点子
I'm ready to hear those farm fresh concepts.
5号♥会议室
Conference room in five...
厕所男孩！
Toilet boy!
你不用向我解释
You are so not allowed to complain to me.
我知道你是对的好吧现在我在广♥告♥界里
I know. You were right, okay? So now I'm known throughout
有了厕所男孩的绰号♥
the advertising world as "toilet boy."
告诉他你玩够了
Tell him you're done with the games.
你不想再玩了
You don't wanna play anymore.
不不不我不能如果现在退缩
No, no, no, I can't. I can't. If I back down now,
他会觉得我在示弱
he'll see it as a sign of weakness.
这是男人的方式但是
Look, this is the way that guys do business. But...
你说对了他在耍我来吧
So you called it. He made me his bitch. Come on.
给你
Here you go. Oh.
艾德我在想
You know, ed, I've been thinking.
最近我们有很多游戏大家也很开心
We've had a lot of fun and games around here lately,
但现在也许
but maybe it's time
应该让办公室里多点专业精神了
to set a slightly more professional tone in the office.
我懂了
Oh, I get it.
有人跑去找妈妈了是吧？
Somebody went running to mommy, didn't he? Huh?
什么? 汤姆输了几个赌
What? Tom loses a few bets,
所以让你来说情？
so he tries to get his wife to make me back off?
太差劲了
Oh, this issoalpha tau.
我会让他付出代价
I am gonna make him pay.
不不你不能那样
No. No, you're not gonna make him pay.
现在就得停下
You are gonna stop thisnow.
这是我的公♥司♥
This is my company.
如果人们想在这里干活就得按我的规则
If people wanna work here, they play by my rules.
艾德! 怎么？
Ed! What?
我有话说
I'm calling you out.
你说得对
Huh? Yes, you're right.
你的公♥司♥ 按你的规则办事
This is your company, so I'll play by your rules.
我做什么才能让你停下兄弟会的那套？
What do I have to do to get you to stop this frat boy crap?
剔眉毛?不♥穿♥衣服来工作？
Shave my eyebrows? Come to work naked?
你说就是了
Name your stakes.
我没时间怎么了艾德？
I don't have time for this. Aw, what's wrong, ed?
怕被女生击败？
You afraid a phi kapp's gonna get beaten by a girl?
来啊大男人
Come on, big man...
不过一个小赌
It's just a little bet.
你们知道我觉得让办公室里多些乐趣
As you know, I think that making the workplace fun
有助于提高效率
is good for morale.
但勒奈特觉得我们的恶作剧
But Lynette here thinks that our shenanigans
有点过头了
have gotten a little out of hand.
安静
Oh, hold on.
安静我尊重勒奈特的理念
Hold on. I respect Lynette's work ethic.
所以我们决定用一个勇气测试
So we've decided to settle the matter
来解决问题
with a little test of intestinal fortitude.
如果她能吃下
If she can eat 1 pound
一磅客户的农场鲜肉生的
of our client's fine, farm-fresh pork product, raw...
办公室就恢复原来的秩序
There'll be a moratorium on wagering in the office.
哦
Oh, oh!