绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S06E01

Part 1 Feb. 16, 2020, 9:30 a.m.

《绝望的主妇》前情提要
Previously on...Desperate Housewives
卡洛斯的侄女来了
Carlos' niece arrived
我们想让你成为家庭一员
We want you to be part of this family,
但你必须守我们的规矩
But you will obey our rules.
勒奈特和汤姆收到重大消息
Lynette and Tom got big news.
-我们就要再有个孩子了 -双胞胎
- We're gonna have another baby. - Twins
你真想把你妻子送去坐牢
You would actually send your wife to prison?
我妻子不会我前妻当然了
My wife--No. My ex-wife--you bet.
奥森使出了勒索这招
Orson resorted to blackmail.
你是我遇到过的
I think you're the most fascinating woman
最迷人的女人
That I have ever met.
卡尔也展开了行动
And karl made his move.
凯瑟琳和迈克的婚姻
Katherine's marriage to mike...
告诉跟我一起的那位女士我先走了
That woman I was with -- tell her I had to go.
-情况紧急 -...却被搁置了
- It's an emergency. - ...was put on hold.
你们很危险设法离开那辆车
You guys are in danger. Get out of that car.
离大卫远远的
Get away from Dave.
待到尘埃落定婚礼的钟声终于敲响
And when the dust settled, wedding bells rang
为某人敲响
For someone.
面纱用最好的丝绸做成
The veil was made from the finest silk.
吊带用手织的蕾丝编成
The garter was trimmed with handmade lace.
鞋子由米兰最好的设计师设计
The shoes were designed by the top couturier in Milan.
新娘都想自己的婚礼尽善尽美
The bride wanted only the best for her wedding day
因为她即将与
Because she was about to marry
世上最好的男人
The best man in the world...
复婚
For the second time.
-感觉如何 -觉得自己是世界上最坏的人
- How do you feel? - Like the worse person in the world.
别这么对你自己
Don't do this to yourself.
凯瑟琳永远都不会原谅我的
Katherine is never gonna forgive me for this.
妈妈今天是你的大日子
Mom, this is your day.
你和迈克是天生一对
You and Mike were meant to be together.
祝我好运
Wish me luck.
藉由我所被赋予的权力
Then by the power vested in me,
我现在宣布你们
I now pronounce you
成为夫妻
Husband and wife.
新郎可以亲吻新娘了
You may kiss the bride.
是的新娘想要最豪华最好的婚礼
Yes, the bride wanted the best wedding money could buy
但当她步下神坛她马上就意识到...
But as she left the altar, it suddenly occurred to her...
抱歉我迟到了我错过什么了吗
Sorry I'm late. Did I miss anything?
她真该在保安工作上再多花点钱的
She should've spent more on security.
[婚礼前八周]
在郊区要发现罪孽之事并不困难
It's not hard to find sin in the suburbs.
只要往紧闭的门内看进去
Just look behind closed doors.
你就会发现你的邻居们
That's where you'll find your neighbors
偷税漏税
Cheating on their taxes...
滥饮伏特加酒
And drinking too much Vodka...
偷他们父亲的杂♥志♥看
And stealing their father's magazines.
是的郊区充斥着罪人
Yes, the suburbs are filled with sinners,
其中有些偶尔也会幡然醒悟
Some of who occasionally... repent.
我们不能这么做
We can't do this.
这是通奸
It's adultery.
幸好我们都是成年人
Luckily, we're both adults.
住手我结婚了
Mmm. stop! I'm married.
是啊跟个勒索你的男人
Yes, to a man who's blackmailing you.
你不觉得跟你们的离婚律师做♥爱♥
Don't you think making love to your divorce lawyer
将是对他最好的报复
Would be a nifty way to get back at him?
卡尔不行不
Oh, Karl. No. No!
又怎么了
What now?
即使我想破戒
If I'm gonna break a commandment,
也不想在这沙发上草草了事
I don't want it to be for a quickie on this couch.
谁说的十点前我还有40分钟空档
Who said quickie? I've got 40 minutes before my 10:00.
保证让你欲♥仙♥欲♥死♥
And thou shalt get sweaty.
我也想跟你做真的但不是在这
I wanna do this. I do. But not here.
得让我觉得自己是特别的
I need to feel special.
但你本就是特别的
But you are special.
你敢说
Are you saying
你从来没跟别的女人在这沙发上做过
You've never made love to another woman on this couch?
但她们都并不特别
Not a special woman.
好吧
Okay. All right.
我懂我懂
I get it. I get it.
我也想好好爱你我会去找家宾馆
I want this to be nice for you. I'll find us a hotel.
都安排好了再给我打电♥话♥
Call me later when you've set something up.
说好了
Done.
先说清楚本次会面不能作数(指律师不收费)
And just so we're clear, this visit was not billable.
早我要迟到了没时间吃早饭了
Morning. I'm late for school. I don't have time for breakfast.
至少带块松饼吃
At least take a muffin.
谢谢卡洛斯叔叔
Thank you, uncle Carlos.
这天穿长袖有点热不是吗
Kind of warm for a sweatshirt, isn't it?
教室里实在有点冷
Oh, it gets really cold in the classroom.
站住
Mm. stop.
-把衣服掀起来 -加布
- Lift it up. - Gaby.
花一小时化妆的女孩子
Girls who spend an hour on makeup
不会穿这样宽松衣服的衣服掀起来
Do not wear baggy sweatshirts. Lift it.
教室里有这么热吗
Well, that oughta heat up the classroom.
-去换一件 -加布你发什么神经
- Go and change. - Gaby, what is your problem?
我们班所有女孩子都这么穿
All the girls in my class dress like this.
所以你们学校的护士是个产科医生
That's why your school nurse is an obstetrician.
-去换件别的 -好我就借件你的上衣穿
- Wear something else. - Fine. I'll borrow one of your tops.
你的上衣一定乐坏了
It might be exciting for it to go someplace
除了超♥市♥它还能见到别的地方
Besides the supermarket.
又吵了
Oh, snap!
当心我揍你
Hey, you I can hit.
看到了吧我要忍♥受多少东西
Do you see what I have to put up with?
-只是一件衬衫而已 -是吗
- It was just a shirt. - Yeah?
每次她都是宵禁后才回家
And when she came home past curfew,
只是晚了40分钟
It was just 40 minutes.
每次她从我皮包里拿钱
And when she took money from my purse,
也只是5美元
It was just $5.
你为什么要这么将就她
Why do you always make excuses for her?
她的生活很不幸
She's had a sad life.
她妈蹲牢房♥ 老爸也出走了
Her mom's in jail. Her dad walked out.
是是
Yeah, yeah,
她就是乡村音乐里唱的那只可怜的小狗
She's one dead dog away from a country song.
我才不管这些
I don't care.
如果让她有安全感的话
Maybe she would calm down
她应该就会学乖一点
If she felt a little more secure here.
我不会签字的
I'm not signing those papers.
我们做她的合法监护人
We need to be her legal guardians.
要我照顾她两年不可能
And look after her for the next two years? No.
除非她改改那些行为举止
Until I see a change in her behavior,
否则一切免谈
I'm keeping all my options open.
这样可以了吧
Is this better?
可以了很好谢谢
Yes. Very nice. Thank you.
站住
Stop.
我闻到什么味儿了
Mmm. What do I smell?
绝望逝去和对崩溃的恐惧
Despair. Mortality. Paralyzing fear.
我想是华夫饼干的味道
Oh. I thought it was waffles.
你有没有想过
Do you realize that
当这对双胞胎读完高中时
When these twins finish high school,
我已经60岁高龄了
I'll be in my 60s?
不
No.
不是你应该只有
No, you'll be in your, uh...
在他们的毕业典礼上
At their graduation,
我就是那个下巴上沾着燕麦片的疯老婆子
I will be the crazy old lady with oatmeal on her chin.
听着我明白这不在计划之中
Look, I know this wasn't planned,
但我们能挺过去的
But we--we can do this.
就像当初我们抚养着四个孩子也是其乐无穷啊
I mean, we had a lot of fun raising the first four kids.
汤姆我们完蛋了
But we were done, tom.
我们已经过了那个年龄了
We were across the finish line.
不再面对尿布
No more diapers.
不再紧张兮兮地喂他们吃胡萝卜