绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S02E20

Part 2 May 22, 2024, 10:07 p.m.

就像我们是姐妹一样
It's like we're sisters.
只是一个漂亮一个难看
There's even a pretty one and an ugly one.
伊迪！
Edie!
不我只是想说卡尔把我们俩搞得一团糟
No, I'm just saying that Karl screwed us both.
是的难以置信
Yes, like you wouldn't believe.
姐♥妹♥们♥ 我完全同意痛斥你们的前男友但是我们应该
Guys, I'm all for bashing exes, but let's save
留一点恨意给那个淫♥荡♥的女人
a little of our hate for his partner in crime...
那个女人
The other woman. Mm-hmm.
是的她们总是有借口
Yeah! You know, they're always coming up with these excuses
为她们破坏别人家庭辩解
to justify being a home-wrecker.
就是!就像他不会和我在一起
Exactly! Like, "he wouldn't have been with me
如果他能在家得到满足
if he was gettin' it at home."
是的亲爱的你才是我一生的爱
Yeah, "honey, you're the love of my life."
她只是后备轮胎
She's just the runner-up."
看孩子在做什么真可爱
Oh, look, the baby's doing something really cute.
她在睡觉
She's sleeping.
像天使一样
Like an angel.
我们都知道卡尔就是一只狗
Look, I think we all know that Karl is a dog. Mm.
我是说但是如果这些婊♥子♥
I mean, but let's face it... If these tramps
没把美食放在外面诱惑他他不可能去吃（指不光是卡尔的问题）
weren't laying out the buffet, he wouldn't be chowing down.
嗯每种情况都不同
Well, every situation is different,
而且我们在知道实情之前很难去判断
and it's hard to judge until we know all the details.
而这...
Which...
很明显我不知道我怎么会知道呢？
Obviously I don't know, because how would I know?
她是个淫♥荡♥下♥贱♥的婊♥子♥ 肯定是
She's a slutty, slutty whore. Absolutely.
是的
Yeah.
你确定她需要这个? 我刚刚给她涂了防晒霜
Are you sure she needs that? I just put sunscreen on her.
是的要带上帽子这是一整套的
Yes, she needs the bonnet. It completes the outfit.
噢加布看在上帝的份上
Oh, for god's sakes, Gaby.
虽然她还小但现在开始打扮不会太早
She's never too young to start accessorizing.
而且今天所有的邻居都在
Besides, all the neighbors are out today,
我想让他们知道我们有多开心让他们羡慕我们
and I want them to see how happy we are and wish they were us.
嘿
Hey.
嗯孩子很漂亮
Uh, the baby's a beauty.
是啊我们有点溺爱她
We think so, but we're a little biased.
喔她的眼睛和我一样
Oh, wow, she's got my eyes.
哦
Huh?
我是戴尔
Oh, I'm Dale.
戴尔赫尔姆我是孩子的亲生父亲
Dale helm. I'm the baby's birth father.
嗯你好戴尔
Uh, well, hi, Dale.
很高兴见到你
Nice to meet you.
很多人都在找你
A lot of people have been looking for you.
是的我知道律师和法♥院♥的那些人
Yeah, I know, lawyers and stuff.
我在佛罗里达州有点事情耽搁了一段时间
I got kinda held up in Florida longer than I thought.
春假对吧？
Spring break, right?
是的伙计我们整天无所事事
Yeah. Oh, man, we were wasted 24/7.
然后我收到短♥信♥就以为是
Then I got the message and just thought
我的朋友在捉弄我那些混♥蛋♥！
my friends were messing with me. Those buttwads!
好吧他在这里是个好事情
Ahem. Well, it's a good thing he's here.
我们可以带他到律师办公室
We can take him to the lawyer's office,
然后你可以把监护权完全转移给我们
and you can sign over full custody to us.
好的
Okay.
嗯关于这个事情
Yeah, uh, the thing about that is,
我想要回孩子
I'm gonna want the baby.
拜托两位我们没必要把这件事弄得太难看
Come on, you guys. We don't have to make this ugly.
你想抢走我们的孩子! 怎么可能不难看！
You're trying to take our baby! How is it not gonna be ugly?
继续走加布别理他
Just keep walking, Gaby. Don't engage him.
听我说索利斯先生...
Listen, Mr. Solis...
不你听着!我们是监护人
No, you listen! We were granted custody.
如果你想要她你和法官去说吧
If you want her, you talk to the judge.
怎么这么慢? 他们让我和法官去说
Hey, what is the holdup? They told me I gotta talk to a judge.
你该死的在这里干吗弗兰克? 这是他的孩子把孩子给他！
What the hell are you doing here, frank? It's his baby. Give it to him!
我才不给呢! 索利斯夫人我能看看孩子吗？
Like hell! Hey, Mrs. Solis, can I see the baby?
不行! 戴尔快点动手！
No! Dale, just do it already!
我不想绑♥架♥孩子干吗不?他们就绑♥架♥了孩子
I'm not just gonna kidnap it. Why not? They did!
这是你的孩子快动手！
It is your baby. Just take it!
你试试看
Try it.
弗兰克？
Frank?
上车笨蛋
Get in, you moron.
不过你们好像对她很不错蠢驴！
Anyways, it looks like you're doing a good job with her. Dumb-ass!
她看上去很干净
She seems clean.
就像我说的我们在这里住得很开心
And like I said, we have been very happy here,
我想你们也会的
and I'm sure you will be, too.
我们都很喜欢是的
Well, we just love it. Yeah.
等楼梯修好了我带你们看地下室
Once the stairs are repaired, I'll show you the basement.
怎么回事？
What's going on?
房♥子刚刚卖♥♥了
The house just sold.
开始收拾行李吧
Start packing.
你们为什么不能把卡博放到收♥容♥所♥去呢？
Why don't you just put Caleb in an institution?
他早晚都要去那我妈不肯让陌生人照顾他
It's where he belongs anyway. My mom would never let strangers take care of him.
那你为什么不报♥警♥？
Then why don't you call the police?
那就不是随她说了算了如果我报♥警♥
Then it's notupto her. If I call the police,
我和我妈就得和卡博一起进监狱
my mom and I go to jail withcaleb.
我们窝藏了一个杀人犯你瞧如果我们...
We've been hiding a murderer. Now, look, if we...
如果我们搬走了我保证每天打电♥话♥给你
If wedomove, I promise I will call you every day.
我不需要一个话友我要的是一个男朋友！
I don't need a phone buddy. I need a boyfriend!
冷静下来好吗? 别告诉我该做什么！
Would you calm down, please? Don't tell me what to do!
你知道我可以自己去报♥警♥！
You know, I could go to the police myself! Danielle...
丹妮尔... 我只是...我太爱你了
I just... I love you so much.
为了能把你留在这我愿意做任何事
I would do anything to keep you here.
是的我看到了
Yeah, I see that now.
你不能把我一个人留在这想想办法
You can't leave me alone here. You have to think of something.
别担心
Don't worry.
我会的
I will.
噢天那！
Oh, my god!
艾得?我很抱歉
Ed? Hey, I'm so sorry,
那只是打给汤姆看的
but obviously that was just meant for Tom's eyes only.
无心之过别担心
Honest mistake. Don't even worry about it.
好的
Okay.
谢谢我回办公室去了
Thanks. Well, I'm gonna go back in my office
继续感觉像个超级大变♥态♥
and continue to feel like a huge pervert.
至少你和汤姆还有感情生活
At least you and Tom havea love life.
条件允许的话我们都会尽力而为
Well, we do the best we can given the circumstances.
总比我和弗兰好我们在那方面就像死掉一样
Better than Fran and I. We're dead in that department.
我不想拿这些事烦你
I don't wanna bore you with the details.
非常感谢
I appreciate that.
你知道吗艾得
You know, ed...
我不管干涉你的私人生活
I don't wanna pry into your personal business,
但是你在那方面好像有点问题
but if you are having problems in that area,
你不必听天由命
you don't have to be resigned to it.
那你想建议我怎么做招♥妓♥？
What are you suggesting, hookers?
不本人不花钱买♥♥性
No, ed ferrara doesn't pay for sex.
我是说你可以和弗兰调调情
I mean, you and Fran could spice it up a bit.
重新激起爱的火花
You know, get the old juices flowing again.
噢我知道
Oh, I see.
就像...
Kinda like, uh...
我要舔遍你的全身
"I'd like to lick you from head to foot."
好吧那并不是我最拿手的
Okay, well, that wasn't my best work,
但效果不容忽视
but you can't deny results.
我要...很管用当我回到家
I.m.ing works, and when I go home tonight,
汤姆和我会...
Tom and I are going to...
好吧我到家都精疲力尽了
Okay, well, I'm gonna be exhausted,
我大概只能躺在那但是相信我
so I'll probably just lay there. But trust me,
汤姆会奉陪到底
tomis gonna go to town.
可以考虑谁知道呢
It's something to think about, lord knows.
不幸的是...
You know what the sad truth is?
我已经在考虑招♥妓♥♥女♥了
Ihavebeen thinking about hookers.
好吧
Okay!
噢希望那会有用
Uh, well, I hope that helped.
我要回去工作了做完我们就都可以回去了
And I'm just gonna go back and finish so we can all get out of here.