绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S06E19

Part 2 Oct. 24, 2019, 3:14 p.m.

这是真的吗
Is this true?
是的我缺了一些课
Yes. I'm a few classes short.
其中一门课是伦理学吧
Is one of them ethics?
安德鲁请别这样
Andrew, please.
我不明白怎么会这样
I don't understand.
最后一学期
It was the final semester.
还差两个月就毕业了
We were about two months in
医生告诉我我妈妈没救了
when the doctor told me my mother was terminal.
我离开学校带她回家
I left school and brought her home
免得她死在医院
so she didn't have to die in the hospital.
你要是愿意
If you like,
我给你看看她的死亡证明
I can save you a phone call
省得你打电♥话♥查了
and bring in her death certificate.
行吧
That's okay.
校方同意让我和同学们一样毕业
The university let me graduate with my class.
下个月我就能修完学分了
I should finish my coursework next month.
不过对不起布里
But I'm sorry, Bree.
我不该歪曲我的学历
I should not have misrepresented myself.
每个人总有做错事的时候
Everyone steps over the line now and then.
有则改之无则加勉
Let's all make an effort not to,
好吗
shall we?
这女人很差劲你干嘛带我来这
This woman is incompetent. Why you bring me here?
是你说要去俄式婚庆用品店的
you're the one who had to come to a Russian bridal shop.
大错特错
It was mistake.
你现在在用你的母语骂人
Well... Look at the fun you're having chewing people out
真是讽刺
in your native tongue.
抱歉她很无礼
Sorry for the way she's been talking to you.
别担心你不是失去儿子
Don't worry. You're not losing a son.
而是娶了个万恶的儿媳
You are gaining a pain in the ass.
跟我说说看
Tell me about it.
我儿子正要跟一个他毫不了解的女人结婚
My son is marrying a woman he barely knows.
他正在铸下终身大错
He's making the biggest mistake of his life,
我对此束手无策
And I am powerless to stop him.
你要是愿意
If you like,
我倒是有些对付的办法
Maybe I get a little sloppy with the pushpins.
哇你真好
Aw, you're sweet.
艾瑞娜你的电♥话♥
Irina? It's your phone.
如果是普雷斯顿告诉他我很快就回去
If it's preston, tell him I be home soon.
好的公主殿下
Okay, your highness.
新娘的电♥话♥
Bride's phone.
艾瑞娜
Irina...
好的慢点说我不懂俄语
Okay. Slow down. I... I don't speak Russian.
艾瑞娜有个俄♥国♥人找你听起来很生气
Irina, it's some Russian guy, and he doesn't sound happy.
亚历克西
Alexei...
那是谁啊
Who was that?
打错电♥话♥了
Wrong number.
打错电♥话♥吗那人指名道姓地找你呢
Wrong number? He asked for you by name.
我要是想让你知道我会用英语说的
If I wanted you to know, I would say it in English.
太太
Missus?
我能用英语说
I can say it in English.
特浓卡布其诺加热
Hey. Double cappuccino, extra hot.
还要点别的吗
Need anything else?
灵感
Inspiration.
抱歉我们只提供松饼
Sorry. We just have muffins.
你在写什么呢
What are you working on?
一部小说
A novel.
我知道有个人也在咖啡馆写小说
I know--another guy in a coffee shop writing a novel.
世界需要这个
Just what the world needs.
不我觉得很好能问问是写什么吗
No, I think it's cool. Mind if I ask what it's about?
你真想知道吗
You really wanna know?
想知道
I do.
一开始是个爱情故事
It started out as a love story,
但逐渐走向悲伤
But it's getting kind of dark.
主人公遇到了女孩
This guy meets this girl,
两人从一无所有开始
takes her from nothing,
给她带来生命的意义
gives her life meaning.
基本上等于重塑了她
Basically creates her.
继续说
Okay.
接着有一天
Then one day,
她消失了
she just disappears...
不见了
vanishes...
跟另一个男人走了
with another man.
倒霉的主人公
Sucks for the guy.
她还带走了他的孩子
And she takes his baby.
该死她听起来真不要脸
Damn. Well, she sounds like a bitch.
确实
Sure does.
管她呢我现在写到
Anyhow, I'm up to the point
这个男人找了她很长时间
where the guy who's been looking for her for a long time
终于找到了
finally tracks her down.
到这儿我就卡住了
And that's where I'm kind of stuck.
他该怎么做呢
What does he do?
我并不了解细节
Well, I don't know all the details,
不过你说当时很黑对吧
But you said it was dark, right?
是啊
Yeah.
我觉得这男的会杀了她
Seems to me the guy would kill her.
有意思我一开始也是这么想的
Funny. That was exactly my first instinct, too.
不行
No.
不行
No?
你要捐赠卵子来征求我同意
You asked my permission to be an egg donor,
我说不行
and I said "No."
我不是在征求你同意我是在告诉你
Oh, I wasn't asking you. I was telling you.
抱歉我没同意的话你不能做这事
Sorry. You can't do this without my approval.
你的卵子有一半是我的
Those eggs are half mine.
-何出此言 -我是你老公
- How so? - I'm your husband.
从你子♥宫♥里出来的东西50%也属于我
I own 50% of whatever comes out of that uterus.
你觉得我的身体属于你
Oh! So you think you own my body.
你穿的衣服是我买♥♥的
I pay for the clothes it wears,
按♥摩♥的钱是我付的
The massages it receives
以后要做什么手术也会是我买♥♥单
and the implants it will one day require.
就算它不是我的我至少也是个大股东
If I don't own it, I'm at least a major stockholder.
也就是说我可以阻止你
Which means I can stop you
随随便便就把卵子
from handing out your eggs like party favors
捐给没孩子的同性恋家庭
to every childless gay couple that wanders by.
你不能阻止我
You cannot stop me.
我的卵子我说了算
I can do whatever I want with my eggs.
那我付款的信♥用♥卡♥我还说了算呢
And I can do whatever I want with the credit cards I pay for.
比如我可以停卡
For example, I can cut them up.
我才不管信♥用♥卡♥怎么样呢
I don't care about credit cards.
我是想做点好事
I am trying to do something noble here.
我在帮助他们建立家庭
I'm helping these people become a family.
你把卡藏起来了是吧
You've hidden the cards, haven't you?
很明显了
Damn straight.
好吧那我求求你
Okay, I am begging you,
作为你的丈夫
as your husband,
请你不要这样做
please don't do this.
你的孩子就住在隔壁感觉太怪了
It'll be too weird having your D.N.A. living next door.
我才不管我已经下定决心了
I don't care. My mind is made up.
我要帮助鲍勃和李生个孩子
I am going to help Bob and Lee have a baby
好让他们能体验那种我们偶尔才能
so they can experience the same love and joy
感受到跟孩子在一起的愉悦
that we occasionally have with our children.
所以那个俄♥国♥售货员给我翻译了一下
So the russian salesgirl translated for me,
你绝对猜不到艾瑞娜给那个
And you'll never guess what Irina said to the...
电♥话♥里的狂躁男人说了什么
Angry guy on the phone.
你真要让我猜吗
Please don't make me guess.
她说打电♥话♥去叫警♥察♥啊
She said, "Go ahead and call the police."
你永远也找不到我
You'll never find me."
就这个
And that's it?
你还想听什么
How much more do you need?
她是个外国人她犯了法
She is a foreigner. She's done something criminal.
把她驱逐出境啊
Start your deportation now.