绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S06E06

Part 3 Oct. 24, 2019, 3:13 p.m.

那些一直要我
The ones who keep telling me that
指控你的人
I should sue you for, uh...
他们怎么说的来着 "威胁人身安全罪"
What did they call it? "Reckless endangerment"?
我很抱歉他们是谁
Yeah, I'm sorry. Who are all these people?
邻居好心人
Neighbors, well-wishers,
还有几个擅长民事诉讼律师
A couple of lawyers who dabble in civil lawsuits.
但我跟他们说 "不我绝不会控告苏珊的"
But I told them, "no, I could never sue Susan."
不管怎样我们还是朋友
In spite of everything, we're still friends.
不过如果事实不是这样的话
But... If that isn't true anymore...
早餐
Brunch! Uh...
我和麦克不喜欢野炊
Mike and I aren't really barbecue people.
我们喜欢早餐派对
We like a good brunch.
所以我们可以约个时间
So... let's give that a shot.
我很抱歉刚才口误说错话了
Um, I'm sorry. That was just a bad choice of words.
我喜欢早餐派对星期天11点
I love it! Sunday around 11:00?
-到时候我带乳蛋饼来 -太好了
- I'll bring a quiche. - Great.
我不再发疯了你高兴吗
Aren't you glad I'm not crazy anymore?
当然这样好多了
Oh, yeah. This is so much better.
我们结束了卡尔
We are over, Karl.
这次我是认真的
And this time I mean it.
得了布里
Oh, come on, Bree.
你要把我当胸针一样甩了吗
You're gonna dump me over a lousy brooch?
不是胸针卡尔是你
It's not the brooch, Karl. It's you.
你偷了苏珊的胸针
Stealing Susan's Jewelry
然后责怪她弄丢了
And then berating her for losing it?
哪种人会这么做呢
What kind of man does that?
比如一个被老婆卷走一切的男人
How about a man whose wife's taking him to the cleaners,
哪个男人会想
Who wants to get back a little of
从卷走一切的老婆那里再讨回一点东西呢
what she's costing him?
不过你怎么会蠢到把胸针送给我
But how could you be so stupid as to then give it to me?
难道你就想不到她会看到我戴着她的胸针
Did it not occur to you that she might see me wearing it?
我跟苏珊离婚后
Hey, when Susie and I divorced,
她丢了许多东西
She lost a lot of things.
我不记得那胸针就是她丢的
I forgot the brooch was one of them.
你在自我辩解
That's your defense
偷的东西多到你都忘了吗
That you stole so much, you lost track?
别忘了是谁为了保护财产
Let's not forget who had no problem
栽赃奥森入室盗窃
Staging a fake burglary to protect her stuff from Orson.
我承认那很卑鄙
Well, I am not proud of that.
我觉得更卑鄙的是
I am even less proud of letting
让我的性本能
my libido blind me to the fact
蒙蔽我接受一个事实
That I have been fornicating
那就是我跟一个道德败坏的黄鼠狼私通
with a morally bankrupt weasel.
-再也不必了我们结束了 -等等
- Well, not anymore. We're done. - Wait.
布里
Bree...
你愿意嫁给我吗
Will you marry me?
你说什么
Excuse me?
我知道这不是求婚的时候
I know, not the best time to ask.
但我怕如果我再等下去就没有机会了
But I was scared if I waited, I wouldn't get another shot.
你有没有想过我甚至...
Do you think for one instant I would even--
不要觉得你现在必须回答我
Don't feel you need to answer right away.
我很肯定
I'm pretty sure
短期内你的回答是什么但是
What the short-term response would be. But, um...
-我爱你布里 -看在上帝的份上卡尔
- I love you, Bree. -For god sakes, Karl.
如果你愿意考虑一下是否成为我的妻子
And I'd be honored if you'd even
我也会感到很荣幸
consider becoming my wife.
-不 -我还没说完
- No. I'm not done.
我曾经拿别人的胸针送人
The man who swiped that brooch
那是过去的我
that was the man I was.
现在的我变了许多
The man I am now is a little better,
但这远不及将来
But he is nothing compared to the man that I could be
有你作为妻子的我
With a woman like you as my wife.
就这些说完了
There. Done.
-卡尔 -什么都别说
- Karl-- - Don't say anything.
走吧好好想想
Just go. Think it over.
-我只想说 -打住打住
- I only wanna say-- - Bup, bup, bup!
好好想想
Just think.
希望没有打扰你
I hope I'm not disturbing you.
我只想谢谢你
I just want to thank you for the...
你还好吗
Oh. Are you okay?
你在哭怎么了
You're crying. What's wrong?
-没有没事有事吗
No, nothing. What's up?
好吧
Oh, okay.
我只想告诉你我们的计划很成功
I just wanted to tell you how well our plan is working.
我们的计划
Our plan?
是啊就是跟苏珊和好的计划
Yeah, the one about taking the high road with Susan.
我刚从那回来她还不知情呢
I was just over there. She doesn't have a clue.
-那是谁 -我妈妈
- Who's that? - My mother.
她住哪儿
Oh! where does she live?
她不在了
She doesn't.
真遗憾
I'm sorry.
明天是她的生日
Tomorrow would've been her birthday.
每年的这个时候我都有点伤感
Every year this time I get a little depressed.
那我们就出去走走一起吃午饭
So let's go out. I'll buy you lunch.
至少我还能请我的"同犯"吃一顿饭
It's the least I can do for my partner in crime.
-你最好别再那样做了 -什么
- Okay, you gotta stop with that. - What?
什么计划啊同犯啊
This "our plan," "partner in crime."
这是你跟苏珊之间的事
This is your thing with Susan.
你想怎样就怎样
You do what you wanna do.
你只不过是因妈妈而伤感
Oh, you're just upset because of your mother.
知道吗
You know what?
我给你煎菠萝蛋糕吧
I'll bake you a pineapple upside down cake.
这是世界上消除悲伤最好的方法
Best thing in the world for depression!
我问遍了周围所有的私立学校
Well, I called every private school in the area.
都是九月才开学
No openings until september.
该死加布
Damn it, Gaby.
你就不能等到了夏天再告那个校长吗
You couldn't wait till summer to cuss out the principal?
我是不退缩的如果她还这么野蛮
I make no apologies. She had it coming.
我也会奉陪到底的
And I'd do it again.
她言语攻击了我们的女儿
She attacked our daughter.
真开心你这么保护我们的女儿
Well, I'm glad you're so devoted to Juanita,
正因为此
'cause you're about to be spending
你们会有更多的时间在一起了
A whole lot more time together.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
我们没得选了
I think we have other choice.
你得在家教她了
You're gonna have to homeschool her.
好好笑啊卡洛斯你真好
That's funny. Oh, you're good, Carlos.
我们的确需要减减压了
We needed something to cut the tension.
但说真的我们该怎么办
But seriously, what do we do?
我是说真的我们去网上登记
Seriously? We enroll online,
他们会寄来课程表然后由你来教她
They send us the curriculum, and you teach her.
慢着慢着在事情没发展到不可收拾时
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Before this gets ugly,
你要明白我真不知道该怎么给她上课
You do realize I don't know how to teach.
是吗你教过胡安妮塔不少脏话
Really? You taught Juanita a few choice words.
我那你呢
Me? How about you?
好**的一天啊
What a blank of a day!
公♥司♥那个叫厄尔的家伙就是个傻*
Earl at the office is such a blank.
我真想把那蠢货脑子里的脑浆都弄出来
I wanna kick the blank out of his blank.
好吧那这个呢那个**美发师
Oh, yeah? How about, that blanking hairdresser
把老子头发都**毁掉了
Totally screwed up my blanking hair!
瞧我啊真**脸见人了
Look at me! I'm totally blanked!
那个**客户不肯签了协议
The blanking client didn't sign the deal,
我们损失了他**的一大笔钱
And we lost a blankload of money.
我* 我***
Wah! Blank, blank, blank!
好了我们都有错
Okay. We are both at fault.
-但还是得你来教她 -好啊
- But you're homeschooling her. - Fine,
但我只知道今晚某人别想**了
But I know someone who isn't getting blanked tonight.
我无所谓
Fine with me.
我之前已经**过了
I blanked off earlier.
-谢谢你送来的派 -不客气
- Thanks again for the pie. - You're welcome.