绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S06E13

Part 3 Oct. 24, 2019, 3:14 p.m.

那你拍色情片的时候他就可以写对白了
So while you're doin' porn, he can make the dialogue rhyme.
这就是我不告诉她的原因
This is why I don't tell her stuff.
好吧
Okay.
很抱歉我只是开个玩笑
I'm sorry. I was just trying to make a joke.
我们还是接着吃饭吧好吗
Let's get back to dinner, huh?
噢不用了我饱了
Oh, no. I'm good.
多糖类不要了
Carbs. Mnh-mnh.
我今天要出门处理事情
Oh, I'll be out running errands today,
所以一会身体理疗师来了
So you'll have to let the physical therapist in
你得给她开门
When she arrives.
有什么问题吗
What's wrong?
没有草莓
There's no strawberries.
你知道我喜欢华夫饼加草莓的
You know I like strawberries with my waffles.
抱歉就在这里给你
I am sorry. They're right here. There you go.
草莓吃吧
Strawberries. Enjoy.
我要生奶油
I need whipped cream.
除非你觉得草莓
Unless you think the strawberries
会自己长腿粘到华夫饼上
Are gonna magically stick to the waffles by themselves.
先等等
Not so fast.
说"请"
Say "Please."
我不会说的
I will not.
把我的早饭给我
Now give me my breakfast.
奥森我很乐意对你有求必应
Orson, I am happy to do whatever you ask,
但我不想被当成奴隶使唤
But I will not treated like a slave.
现在就说"请"
Now say "Please."
我看着你的华夫饼
Now that I look at your waffle,
终于明白你为什么那么想吃了
I understand why you're so eager to have it.
布里
Bree...
你知道该说什么
You know the magic word.
六个字母的[please]
It has six letters.
我知道一个三个字母的词[sob]
I know a word that has three.
如果你不把吃的给我
If you don't give me my food,
我就用那把叉子捅它
I'm gonna shove that fork up it.
等你学会礼貌以后就可以吃了
You can have it when you're ready to be polite.
霍伯森先生我女儿非常聪明
Mr. Hobson, my daughter is incredibly bright.
我只想知道她是否在高级班
I just need to know if she's in the advanced classes.
你应该知道我们不会泄露这个的
You know that we have a policy not to disclose that.
你什么也不用说
Oh, you don't have to say anything.
当我提到聪明组时眨眨眼就行
Just blink when I mention the smart group.
猎豹
Leopard.
索利斯太太
Mrs. Solis...
等等你刚才是眨眼还是抽筋
Wait, was that a blink or a twitch?
我看不出来你看起来很紧张
I can't tell. You seem very nervous.
你看这就是我们不告知家长的原因
You see, this is exactly why we don't tell the parents.
他们会失去理智
They start behaving irrationally.
而且别想看我桌子下面的东西
And stop trying to read things on my desk upside-down.
有什么大不了的
What is the big deal?
我不过是想知道
I just need to know
我女儿会不会有出息
If my daughter's gonna succeed in life.
她才7岁
She's 7.
我劝你还是别在这打探了
Now I suggest that you stop prying
不管被分在哪个组只要以她为荣就好
And just be proud of her no matter what group she's in.
我一直以她为荣而且我没有打探
I am proud of her, and I don't pry.
顺便说一句祝你16号♥结肠镜检愉快
By the way, enjoy your colonoscopy on the 16th.
妈妈你在这里干嘛
Mom. What are you doing here?
我只是来认识一下你的校长
I was just having a nice get-to-know-you chat
你的朋友们叫什么名字呀
With the principal. Who are your friends?
这是温迪和瑞秋
Um, this is wendy and rachel.
我们一起上数学课
We're in math together.
等等我想我见过你做的手工
Wait a minute. I think I saw your art projects.
温迪你是花栗鼠对吗
Wendy, you're a chipmunk, right?
瑞秋你是长颈鹿对吧
And, rachel, you're a giraffe?
好的
Oh, okay.
知道我想干嘛吗
You know what I would love to do?
我要给胡安妮塔和她的朋友们照张相
Is take a picture with juanita and her friends.
知道怎么样会更可爱吗
And, uh, you know what would be really cute?
把你们的数学作业都举起来
Is if you hold up your math homework.
好的
Got it.
可是我刚才没笑
But I wasn't smiling.
是吗外面的世界很残酷的
Yeah? Well, it's a tough world out there.
也没什么可笑的
Not much to smile about.
今天过的愉快哦
Have a great day!
你妈妈可真奇怪
Your mom's weird.
你都想象不到的
You have no idea.
奥森
Orson?
我自己进来了
I'm letting myself in.
理疗的时间到了
Time for your therapy.
救命
Help me!
噢
Oh!
救我
Help.
噢我的天哪
Oh! Dear lord!
奥森
Orson!
发生什么事了
Oh! What happened?
乔伊斯
Oh! Joyce.
我只是想拿那些华夫饼
Well, I was trying to get those waffles,
结果就从椅子上掉下来了
And I fell out of my chair.
它怎么会在那么高的地方
W-w-what are they doing up there?
不给他吃饭
Starving him?
-那太荒谬了 -真的吗
- That's ridiculous. - Really?
那你没有折磨他
So you don't torment him
把吃的放在他够不着的地方吗
by putting food out of his reach?
那倒是需要你帮帮他
Oh. Well, you kinda had to be there for that.
我能吃点面包吗
Can someone please get me a piece of bread?
奥森看在上帝的份上别装了
Orson, for god sakes! Stop that!
这次打我的腿吧
Please hit me in the legs this time.
那里没有感觉
There's no feeling there.
豪治太太我能单独和你说两句吗
Mrs. Hodge, may I speak to you privately for a moment?
你得相信我
You--you have to believe me.
我是决不会打我的丈夫的
I would never hit my husband.
我知道他可能有些夸张
I sensed him being a little dramatic.
但不给吃的
But withholding food?
这都是因为他不肯说"请"
The whole thing started because he refused to say please...
我知道听起来有点小气
Which I know sounds rather petty,
但你得理解
But you have to understand.
他最近很不可理喻
He has been impossible lately.
这个男人下半生都要做轮椅了
The man is facing life in a wheelchair.
他对整个世界都感到愤怒
He's mad at the world,
而且很不幸的他把气撒在你身上
And unfortunately, he's taking it out on you.
我知道这很不容易
Look... I know this is not easy.
但在他接受现实以前
But until he comes to accept this,
你得想办法让自己耐心一点
You're gonna have to figure out how to be more patient.
而如果你做不到
And if you can't,
我有责任上报这一情况
it's my obligation to report it.
还有给他洗个澡
Oh, and give the man a bath.
我可不想戴手套给他理疗
Physical therapy shouldn't require gloves.
刚才送来的时候你们不在家
You weren't home when they tried to deliver this,
所以我帮你签收了
So I signed for it.
我们只是看到广♥告♥
Yeah, we jt-- we had, uh, we saw an ad for...
说真的不用告诉我
Honest to god, don't need to know.
好的
Good. Um...
看啊
Ah, look.
貌似有人找到新女朋友了
Looks like somebody got a new girlfriend.
是啊不会长久的我不同意
Yeah, not for long. I do not approve.
你不同意可她的身材
Ah. You don't approve, and she's got a body
可真是让人神魂颠倒啊
that would make the pope walk through a sliding glass door.
天那谁会赢得这场战争呢
Gosh, who's gonna win?
他是我的孩子要是我觉得她配不上他
He is my kid.If I don't think she is good for him,
我就会不惜一切阻止
I will do whatever I have to do.
这样就会让他远离你而偏向她
Which will drive him towards her and away from you.
我了解这种情况
Look, I know what it's like