绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S06E13

Part 4 Oct. 24, 2019, 3:14 p.m.

母亲讨厌性感的儿媳
When a mom hates the hottie her son loves.
鲍勃的妈妈一直很讨厌我
Bob's mom hated me. Ugh.
我一直以为鲍勃是
Huh. I always thought that bob was--
重点是
The point is,
她从中作梗
She overplayed her hand
还让鲍勃在我和她之间选择
and made bob choose between us.
长话短说
And the long story short,
现在是我每晚抱着鲍勃入睡
I'm cuddling up with bob every night.
妈妈去哪里了呢养老院
And where's mama? Nursing home.
她怎么进去的呢不知道记不清了
How'd she get there? Don't know. Can't remember.
只是我并不了解这个姑娘
It's just... I don't know this girl.
我不知道能不能相信她
And I-I-I don't know if I can trust her.
你最好试着了解她
Well, then you better get to know her.
我可不想看到你最终失去儿子
I'd hate to see you lose your son
就因为你想独霸他
because you're afraid to share him.
闪一边儿去
Get outta here.
卡洛斯你收到我发的照片了吗
Carlos, did you get the pictures I sent you?
你还是一如我们初见时那般美丽
You're as beautiful as the day we met.
岁月没有在你身上留下任何痕迹
Time hasn't touched you at all.
不是我的照片是关于数学家庭作业的
Not of me, of the math homework.
什么
What?
看这个
Here.
这个作业看起来很简单对吗
This assignment looks easy, doesn't it?
没错完全是基本的
Pretty basic, yeah.
再看这个乘法
And look at this one with the multiplication,
稍稍复杂了点是吗
little more complicated, right?
我想是的
I guess.
再看这个
And this one...
文字描述还有分数
Word problems. Fractions.
这个是最难的对吗
This is the hardest one, isn't it?
看起来是这样那又如何
Looks like it. So?
卡洛斯这是猎豹组的家庭作业
Carlos, this is the leopard's homework.
你的表达真清楚啊
Well, that cleared that up.
你还没有明白吗我们的女儿是猎豹组的
No. Don't you get it? Our daughter is a leopard.
是在快班
She's in the advanced class.
她很厉害嘛
Hey! Good for her.
可怜的苏珊
Oh, poor Susan.
这个又怎么讲
Yeah? Why?
她确信MJ非常聪明
Well, she was convinced that M.J.'s brilliant,
结果居然是慢班的
and it turns out he's in the slow group.
如果是我可不想知道真♥相♥
I'd hate for her to find out.
-加布你可不能告诉她 -为什么不能
- Gaby, you are not telling her. - Why not?
她可是很乐意告诉我她觉得胡安妮塔
She didn't have any trouble telling me she thought Juanita was one
-脑袋不太灵光 -她是这样说的吗
- thermos short of a lunch box. - She said that?
是的用语气表达出来的
Yes. With her tone.
最近我们和邻居们闹得跟拍电影一样
Well, we've had enough drama with the neighbors lately,
别再弄出什么事了
so just drop it.
好的我不再提这事了我告诉你
Fine, I'll drop it. But just so you know,
我还宁愿你边看报纸边假装听我讲话
I like you better when you're reading the newspaper pretending to listen.
好的没问题想拿多少拿多少
Sure, take whatever you need.
你来这儿做什么
What are you doing here?
我跟他们讲了我不需要人来探访
I told them I don't want any visitors.
谁说我是来探访你的
Who says I'm visiting?
可能我心理上也有问题需要来这里住住
Maybe I'm bonkers, too.
这苹果酱给我吃行吗
Gonna eat the applesauce?
还记得我痛风特别严重时几乎不能走吗
Remember when my gout flared up and I couldn't walk?
你总是来探望我
And you used to come over to see me?
我觉得我欠你人情
I figured I owe ya.
还清了再见
Debt paid. Good-bye.
看来你的迷人魅力又回来了
I see you got your charming personality back.
你打算什么时候回家
So... when are you gonna be coming back home?
你为什么觉得我还会回去
What makes you think I would ever come back?
在我做了那些坏事之后大家恨我
After what I did to those people? No. They hate me.
别再钻牛角尖了
Take it from the reigning odd duck on the lane,
没人会介意你做的傻事
nobody cares about all that silly stuff.
你说得对布里和我可以边笑边聊
Oh, you're right. Bree and I can just laugh, laugh, laugh
关于我这个傻瓜是如何差点毁了她的事业
about silly me nearly destroying her business.
我还可以告诉苏珊之前我尝试毁掉
And I'll tell Susan that I was just joshing about
-她的婚姻只是在开玩笑而已 -好的够了
- trying to wreck her marriage. - Yeah. Okay. Okay.
我还敢说麦克一定还把被我
Oh, and I'll bet Mike is still chuckling
扔进监狱的事当作笑料
about me getting him thrown in jail.
听我说好吗凯瑟琳我是认真的
Will you listen? Kathy, I'm serious.
我敢打赌
I'm willing to bet
宽恕会远远多于你的想像
there's more forgiveness there than you imagine.
如果你真这么想那么好吧
In that case, you know what?
怎样
What?
也许你真该住在这里医疯病
Maybe you are bonkers.
亲爱的
Hey, hon.
看看这是谁来了
Look who's here.
苏珊有何贵干啊
Hey, Susan. What's up?
我收拾了一下MJ的东西
I was going through some of M.J.'s stuff,
看到有些去年的数学练习本
and I found these math workbooks from last year.
觉得这些对胡安妮塔可能有帮助
I thought Juanita would find them helpful.
这个嘛
Well...
谢谢啦
Thank you.
别客气我觉得可以帮助她快点跟上
No problem. I thought it might help her catch up.
跟上
Catch up?
是啊补上她不在学校的落下的课
Yeah. You know, from when she was out of school.
她可没有跟学校脱节
She was never out of school,
我一直在家教她呢
I was homeschooling her.
我当然知道你已经尽力而为了
And I know you did the best you could.
现在她在学校有专业老师教
But now she has professional teachers,
我肯定她马上就可以赶上MJ的程度了
and I bet she's gonna catch up to M.J. in no time.
上吧
Get her.
那么苏珊
Well, Susan...
顺便问一下你听说了吗
Ahem, by the way, did you hear?
猎豹组才是快班的学生
Leopards are the advanced students.
什么
What?
这是真的花鼠组是平均水平
Yeah. It's true. Chipmunks are average.
至于长颈鹿组嘛
And giraffes--
恐怕要推食堂餐桌了
Well, those cafeteria tables aren't gonna move themselves.
你是怎么知道的
How do you know this?
每个组别的作业我都有
I got a copy of each group's homework.
相信我我破解了动物代码
Trust me. I cracked the code.
这样说来我的MJ并不是在...
So that means that M.J.'s not in the...
你自己也说了没什么大不了的
Hey, but you said it yourself-- it's no big deal.
"只为学习不为竞赛" 我没记错吧
"It's the pace, not the race," Right?
是的
Right.
还有请一定要守口如瓶
Oh, and please, don't say anything to anyone.
你也知道有些家长较劲得可厉害了
You know how competitive some parents can get.
是没错
Huh. Yeah.
望子成龙嘛
All too well.
我吃完了我可以喝牛奶吃饼干了吗
I'm finished. Can I have my milk and cookies now?
当然可以小甜心
Sure, sweetie.
你右边脸上沾上了意面酱
You have some pasta stuck to the right side of your face.
不对小甜心你的右边
No, sweetie. Your right.
还是算了吧
Oh, never mind.
大家好啊
Hey, guys.
麦克帮我把垃圾倒一下好吗
Mike, can you help me take out the trash?
没问题
Sure.
别管垃圾了
Never mind that.
好吧他是长颈鹿组的
Okay, so he's a giraffe.
就算只是平均水平也没什么不好啊
You know, there's nothing wrong with being average.
不对花鼠组才是平均水平
No, chipmunks are average.
跟你讲了无数次
How many times do I have to tell you?
猎豹花鼠最后是长颈鹿
Leopards, chipmunks, giraffes.
麦克我非常爱他
I love him so much, Mike.
可万一他
What if he's...
迟钝
Slow?
他才不会迟钝
He's not slow.