欢乐合唱团（2009）
Glee S01E02
Part 5
Nov. 17, 2020, 9:16 a.m.
Then we come together to share our faith.
然后聚到一起讨论心得
I'm still on the fence about the celibacy club.
在禁欲俱乐部里我还是中立派
I mean, I only joined to get into Quinn Fabray's pants.
因为想上奎恩·法布蕾才加入的
Still, it is a productive way for us guys to get together
但是 我们一起讨论性经验
And talk about sexual issues.
还是挺有效的
I think I'm going to kill myself.
我快要自杀了
I'm serious.
真的
We're bombarded with sexual imagery every day.
每天我们都沉浸在性幻想中
Beer ads, those short skirts.
啤酒广♥告♥和短裙
I'm supposed to be surrounded by temptation,
难道我就得天天面对诱惑
Not be able to do anything about it?
一直无能为力吗
Are you kidding?
开玩笑吧你
Those skirts are crunchy toast.
那短裙简直是天赐
Santana Lopez bent over in hers the other day,
桑塔纳·洛佩斯穿着它弯下腰
And I swear I could see her ovaries.
我都能看见她的卵巢了
God bless the perv that invented these.
感谢发明短裙的天才
Remember the power motto, girls.
请谨记座右铭 女孩们
It's all about the teasing and not about the pleasing.
挑逗但不取悦
Oh! Back it up like a dump truck,
准备好了开始吧
Baby.
宝贝
So, how far does quinn let you get anyway?
你和奎恩发展到什么地步了
We grind, make out.
卿卿我我 摸摸啵啵
But how do you keep from... arriving early?
怎么保证不早...泻?
Whenever I grind, cinco de mayo.
当我跟女孩子亲热的时候 就...泻了
It's not a problem for me, man.
这对我来说不是问题
Actually, it's a big problem.
对我来说这才是大问题
Somebody once told me
有人告诉我
That to keep from erupting too early,
要想迟点"爆发"
You should think of dead kittens and stuff.
可以想想死猫或者别的
But the only image that works for me happened
不过唯一对我起作用的
The day my mom took me out
是老妈带我出去
To practice for my driver's permit.
为考驾照练车
Pretty good, honey.
开的不错 亲爱的
Who says a father figure's necessary, huh?
谁说孩子的成才离不开父亲?
Driving's fun. Yeah.
开车很有趣嘛
Oh, my god!
天啊
Oh, my! Oh, my! Oh, my god, you killed him.
天啊 你肯定撞死他了
What are you gonna do?
你在做什么
Let's pair up for the immaculate affection.
大家搭伴体验柏拉图式恋爱
Now, remember, if the balloon pops,
记住了 气球要是破了
The noise makes the angels cry.
爆♥炸♥声会把天使吓哭的
You enchant me.
你真令人着迷
Yeah.
来呀
Stop it! Take it.
停下 来吧
Ah, yeah! Oh!
太爽了
Finn!
芬恩
It must have hit my zipper.
肯定是碰到拉链了
You know what? This is a joke.
这太搞笑了
Did you know
你们知道吗
That most studies have demonstrated
大多数研究表明
That celibacy doesn't work in high schools?
高中禁欲俱乐部形同虚设
Our hormones are driving us too crazy to abstain.
荷尔蒙的作用让我们无法自控
The second we start telling ourselves
从我们在暗示自己"不可以发生"的时候
That there's no room for compromise, we act out.
其实我们已经输了
The only way to deal with teen sexuality
青少年性行为唯一的解决之道
Is to be prepared.
就是做好准备
That's what contraception is for.
所以才会有避孕措施
Don't you dare mention the "c" word.
你不许说"避孕"这个词
You want to know a dirty little secret
女生也有难以启齿的小秘密
That none of them want you to know?
她们不想你们知道
Girls want sex just as much as guys do.
女生与男生一样渴望性♥爱♥
Is-is that accurate?
是真的吗
Will?
威尔?
Emma... what are you doing here so late?
艾玛 这么晚你怎么还在这里
I do SAT prep on tuesday nights.
每周二晚我为高考做学生辅♥导♥
Are you, um, are you a janitor?
你是校工?
A ja... no.
不是啊
Really? Cause you're dressed like a janitor
真的吗 你穿的像个校工
And your shirt says "will."
衣服上还写着你的名字
Um... terri and I are trying to buy a house,
特丽和我打算买♥♥个大房♥子
And we're, you know, struggling to make ends meet, and...
我们金钱上有点捉襟见肘了
I'm really embarrassed.
我觉得尴尬了
Would you mind keeping this between us?
别说出去好吗
Yeah.
好的
Oh, yeah, your secret's completely safe with me.
没问题 我会帮你保守秘密
Thank you.
谢谢
Do you, um...
你
Do you want a hand?
需要帮忙吗
Oh, no.
不用
I-I'm good, really.
我能行的
Really, because, um, I can see from here
是吗 我从这都能看见
That you've used window cleaner to mop the floor.
你用擦窗户的板刷来拖地
And, uh, that keyboard is crawling in e coli,
那边的键盘上全是大肠杆菌
Because I know for a fact Ms. Hoffmeyer
因为霍夫米尔女士上完大号♥
Doesn't wash her hands after doing number twos.
从来不洗手
I really admire you working so hard for something you want.
我挺佩服你为梦想努力奋斗
Let's make a deal.
咱们来个约定吧
You're helping me with my problem,
你帮我打扫
How about I take a stab at one of yours?
我帮你解决你的问题
Oh, no, I don't,
我没有问题
I don't have a problem.
没有问题需要解决
You've been scrubbing that pencil sharpener for an hour.
你在那清理了整一个小时削铅笔机
Well, I mean, I have,
我可能
I have a little trouble with messes,
可能只是对脏东西敏感
But it's not like it's a... problem.
这不算是问题吧
Okay.
好吧
When I was a little girl,
但我还是小姑娘的时候
It was my dream to work on a dairy farm.
我梦想着要在奶牛场工作
Really?
真的吗
Um, when I was eight,
当我八岁的时候
We finally visited one, and after the tour
去参观了一个奶牛场
And the yogurt tasting, my, my brother
之后品尝了酸奶
Pushed me into the runoff lagoon.
然后我哥把我推到奶牛场边的湖里
What?
什么
And, um, ever since then I've just...
从那以后
I've had a little trouble
我就对那股味道
Forgetting the, uh, the smell.
耿耿于怀
Have you thought about, I don't know,
你想过没有
Maybe seeing someone about that?
去找医生咨♥询♥一下
Oh, no, it's completely manageable.
没事的 这也不是病
You know, I just try to take lots of showers
我只是一天洗几次澡
And I, um, you know, I don't eat dairy.
而且不吃奶制品
So...
所以
I want to try...
我想尝试下
...a little experiment.
一种实验疗法
Oh, no. No, I'm not really, um, comfortable
不用了 这样我会...
With, with... that.
很不自在...
There.
好了
Ten seconds.
十秒钟了
New record.
破纪录了
It's late. I should, um...
已经很晚了 我该
I should be, um... going.
我该走了
I officially
我正式宣布
Call this meeting of glee club in session.
欢乐合唱团的会议开始
But Mr. Schuester isn't here. Mr. Schuester isn't coming.
但是舒先生还没来 舒先生不来了
I paid a freshman to ask him for help
我找了个新生让舒先生给他讲解
With irregular verbs.
不规则动词
I'm so sick of hearing you squawk, eva peron.
我受不了你唧唧喳喳的 总统夫人
Let her talk.
让她说完
I have another idea for the assembly.
关于等下的聚会我另有主意
欢乐合唱团（2009）
Glee
剧集 | 欢乐合唱团（2009） | 导航列表