疯狂前女友（2015）

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend S01E11

Part 3 March 26, 2021, 2:36 p.m.

♪ Of that moronic text somehow ♪
♪ 抢在乔希看前删掉短♥信♥ ♪
♪ There's no turning back ♪
♪ 已经无路可退 ♪
♪ Here in the danger zone ♪
♪ 现在情况危急 ♪
♪ You've got to manually delete that text ♪
♪ 你必须亲手把短♥信♥ ♪
♪ From that dude's cell phone... ♪
♪ 从他手♥机♥里删掉 ♪
Thank you, officers!
谢谢警官
Good luck, Rebecca!
祝你好运瑞贝卡
♪ It's a text-mergency ♪
♪ 这是个短♥信♥危机 ♪
♪ Baby can't you see ♪
♪ 宝贝难道你还不明白吗 ♪
♪ Text-mergency ♪
♪ 短♥信♥危机 ♪
♪ That term just occurred to me ♪
♪ 突然想到这个词 ♪
♪ It's gonna catch on instantly ♪
♪ 它很快就会家喻户晓 ♪
Wait, what about...
等等不如
♪ Text-tastrophe ♪
♪ 短♥信♥灾难 ♪
♪ That sounds better to me ♪
♪ 我觉得听上去更好 ♪
♪ Text-tastrophe ♪
♪ 短♥信♥灾难 ♪
♪ That could really spread virally ♪
♪ 这才能家喻户晓 ♪
♪ I prefer text-mergency! ♪
♪ 我更喜欢短♥信♥危机 ♪
♪ I accidentally texted my mother-in-law ♪
♪ 我不小心给我岳母发了条 ♪
♪ A picture of my erection ♪
♪ 有我勃起照的短♥信♥ ♪
♪ I once group-texted my whole staff ♪
♪ 我有一次群发给我的员工 ♪
♪ About my yeast infection ♪
♪ 一张我宫颈感染的图片 ♪
♪ Exactly, it's so relatable ♪
♪ 确实这是真的 ♪
♪ That's why I coined the phrase... ♪
♪ 所以我才杜撰了这个词... ♪
♪ Text-tastrophe ♪
♪ 短♥信♥灾难 ♪
♪ That's the meme, don't you agree? ♪
♪ 这才是文化资讯传承你不觉得吗 ♪
All due respect.
无意冒犯
♪ Text-mergency is the better term, Miss C. ♪
♪ 短♥信♥危机更好康小姐 ♪
Um, I want to go with...
我想用
♪ Text-tastrophe ♪
♪ 短♥信♥灾难 ♪
♪ I already put it on Urban Dictionary... ♪
♪ 我已经把它放进都市字典了 ♪
You fools, it doesn't matter what it's called.
你们这帮傻♥逼♥ 叫什么都不重要
That's right, it's me, the ghost of Steve Jobs.
没错就是我史蒂夫·乔布斯的鬼魂
What matters is that I control your lives from the grave.
重要的是我死了都控制着你们的生活
Technology is slowly alienating everyone
科技正在慢慢使所有人
from their loved ones.
都与他们所爱的人疏远
And when you send a few words to the wrong recipient
一旦你短♥信♥发错了人
and it immediately destroys your entire life,
就会马上毁了你的生活
that's called a...
这就是
♪ Message-pocalypse ♪
♪ 信息末日 ♪
♪ Get out of here, Steve Jobs! ♪
♪ 滚蛋史蒂夫·乔布斯 ♪
Guys, what about that lawyer chick?
伙计们那个律师妞怎么办
We've gotten really off track.
我们严重跑题了
♪ She's searching for the spare key ♪
♪ 她正在找备用钥匙 ♪
♪ Look under the mat! ♪
♪ 看看垫子底下 ♪
♪ It's clearly hidden in that owl! ♪
♪ 显然藏在猫头鹰里啊 ♪
♪ Look in that flower pot, hurry... ♪
♪ 看看花盆底下快点... ♪
♪ Hurry up and check that Buddha sconce... ♪
♪ 快点看看那个佛陀烛台... ♪
♪ Check the Buddha sconce, check the Buddha sconce! ♪
♪ 看看那个佛陀烛台快看那个佛陀烛台 ♪
Yes!
太好了
♪ She did it ♪
♪ 她找到了 ♪
♪ Now she can delete the text ♪
♪ 现在她能删掉短♥信♥了 ♪
♪ She won't need to come up with a... ♪
♪ 她不用再想出一个... ♪
♪ Text-scuse ♪
♪ 短♥信♥借口 ♪
♪ Text-planation. ♪
♪ 短♥信♥解释 ♪
Text-mergency just flows.
短♥信♥危机已经摆平了
No, dude, text-tastrophe.
不哥们儿是短♥信♥灾难
It's what it is. Dude, she's totally right.
本来就是哥们儿她说的没错
Text-scuse me?
不好意思
Okay.
好了
Pass-code, shoot.
密♥码♥ 该死
Jesus's birthday?
是基♥督♥生日吗
12-25, no.
1225 不对
Uh, last four of social?
身份证最后四位
3-1-2-4, no.
3 1 2 4 还不对
Valencia's birthday?
难道是瓦伦西亚的生日
Let's see, it's 5-5... 5-5-8-8.
让我想想好像是5 5... 5588
Yes! Oh, God, he really loves her.
进去了天哪他确实很爱她
Okay.
好了
Text messages.
短♥信♥
“Rebecca Bunch,” ooh, that's a bad one.
"瑞贝卡·宾治" 这条太糟了
♪ Don't smell the shirt ♪
♪ 别闻那件衬衫 ♪
♪ You're running out of time. ♪
♪ 你来不及啦 ♪
All right.
太好了
Honey, you heard what Father Brah said.
亲爱的你听见布布拉赫神父说的了
We need to really connect.
我们真的要交交心了
Put the phone away.
放下手♥机♥
You're right.
你说得对
You're absolutely right.
你说得很对
Okay, let's do this, let's... connect.
好了我们开始吧我们开始交心吧
You blinked. I win.
你眨眼了我赢了
I...I don't think that's what we're supposed to be doing.
我我认为我们不该在这儿干瞪眼
I don't know what we're supposed to be doing.
我都不知道我们该干嘛
Maybe we should hold hands.
或许我们该手握着手
Okay.
好的
You know, mine is really good.
我的很好吃
Do you want to try it?
你想尝尝吗
Sure.
好啊
Uh, okay.
好的
This is nice.
好吃
Yep.
是的
Josh.
乔希
What are you... ?
你在这
Oh... my God, thank God you're back.
我的天哪太好了你终于回来了
What's going on?
怎么回事
Uh, how did you get in here?
你怎么进来的
How does anyone get in anywhere?
人们都是怎样进别人的家
It's like we're there, and then we're here.
就好像我们在一会儿这儿一会儿又在那儿
Aah, God.
天哪
What?
什么
Okay, slow down, slow down, slow down.
好吧别急慢慢来慢慢来
Just slow down.
慢慢来
Okay, uh, give me a second to just get my story straight.
给我点时间解释清楚
Did you break in?
你是强行闯入的吗
Break-in, yes, there was a break-in.
强行闯入是的是强行闯入
But not here, not here, never here.
但不是这儿肯定不是这儿
What? Okay.
什么好吧
So I was in my, uh, apartment,
当时我在我的公♥寓♥
and, uh, somebody did the thing that you...
然后有人做了你刚刚
you were just saying, the thing that you were just saying.
说的那件事就是你刚说的那事
They broke in? Yes.
他们强行闯入了是的
Yes, you're so good. We should have a charades night.
是的你太厉害了我们得来个猜字游戏之夜
Okay, Rebecca...
好的瑞贝卡
I haven't seen anyone since the beach.
自从上次去沙滩之后我还没见过大家呢
Rebecca, wait, wait, someone broke into your house?
瑞贝卡等等有人闯进你家
Yes, yes, they broke in, and, um, they...they smashed it,
对对他们闯进去然后砸了个稀巴烂
uh, with a big...
额用一个大
Rock. Yes.
石头是的
You're so good at this.
你太厉害了
We should do teams of two.
我们应该组队玩猜字游戏
When are you next free?
你下次放假什么时候
Wait, wait, Rebecca, Rebecca.
等等瑞贝卡
Just hold yourself together.
你先冷静一会儿
Did you call the police?
你报♥警♥了吗
No, no, no cops.
没有没有没报♥警♥
No, didn't call the police.
不我没报♥警♥
So why are you here?
那你来这儿干嘛
Slow down!
慢慢来
Okay, so after I couldn't reach you,
好的因为我联♥系♥不上你
I came here to be with you and your girlfriend.
我就来找你和你的女朋友