疯狂前女友（2015）

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend S01E03

Part 2 March 26, 2021, 2:33 p.m.

Yeah, I saw that coming.
我就知道会这样
I don't know what to do.
我不知道怎么办
Well, that's okay, 'cause I do.
没关系我知道怎么做
Huh? Oh, come on.
算了吧
It's a classic dilemma.
这是个经典的进退两难情况
How do you see your crush...
你怎样去看你的爱人
I mean, friend... without pissing off his girlfriend,
我意思是朋友又不会让她女友生气
and look fabu in a super-tight low-cut dress in the process?
而在见面时还能穿超紧低胸短群呢
There's a solution, a loophole.
这有个解决方案一个漏洞
It is in every teen movie ever made.
所有青春电影里都有这个梗
It's a car wash?
是洗车吗
Throw a big party!
是办一个大派对
No. What?
不什么
Yes, throw a big party.
办个大派对
That way, when Josh comes,
那样当乔希来
you're not technically alone with him,
严格说你就不是单独和他在一起
and then he can't get in trouble! Okay, I see your logic...
他也不会有麻烦好啦我懂你的逻辑
Very sound logic, um, but I don't do that.
听起来很合理但我不会这样做
I don't throw parties. It's not a thing I do.
我不举办派对这不是我做的事
I go to parties. Okay. Why?
我只会去派对好吧为什么
Oh, God, um...
天哪恩
it's, like, a super long story.
这说来话长
Okay, um, ooh...
好的恩
So, when I was 12... Okay.
当我12岁时好啦
No, no. I don't have time for this.
我没时间听这个
What happened? The tissues fell out of your training bra?
发生了什么被人发现你在内衣里加料装胸大吗
You period-ed on a white couch? We've all been there.
还是经血印了在白沙发上这我们都有过
I period-ed on an ultra suede settee in 1987
我1987年在罗伯塔·公♥寓♥里的
at Roberta Janatelli's condo, and
仿麂皮无纺布沙发上来经
I got to tell you, it was still a great party.
我要告诉你派对依旧超棒
I wrapped a sweater around my waist,
我把一件毛衣围在我腰上
then hooked up with Bobby Henderson anyway.
然后勾上波比·亨德森还跟他啪啪啪
And started the whole, um,
然后整个
sweater-around-the-waist trend while I was at it.
毛衣围腰的流行风尚开始
So, you're welcome.
所以不用谢喔
Paula, you don't understand what I am saying.
宝拉你不懂我在说什么
I need you to listen to me, okay?
我需要你听我说好吗
This was the worst party of all time.
这是我人生中最糟糕的派对
So, I invited everyone in my grade to come over to my house
我邀请同年级所有人来我家
and watch the pay-per-view concert of my favorite
一起观看按次计费演唱会里
boy band, Room Temperature.
我最爱的男子乐队室温乐队
So, I threw this party,
所以我举办了这个派对
and this is how many people showed up.
这就是来的所有人
Concert starts in ten minutes!
演唱会10分钟后就要开始啦
Who's psyched?!
谁激动啦
Well,
好吧
that was a tepid response.
真是个不够热情的回应喔
Get it?
懂了吗
It's a temperature joke.
是个关于室温乐队的双关语喔
And then it happened.
之后坏事就发生了
Keep your voice down. She's having a party.
小点声儿她在开派对
You call that a party?
这也叫派对啊
That's her and her three loser friends.
就她和她那三个挫逼朋友
You couldn't even throw her a decent party!
你都不能给她办个像样的派对
Well, then why don't you call your whore
行啊那你怎么不叫你那个婊♥子♥
and ask her what she would do?!
问问她会怎么办
Um, they're just rehearsing a play called
额他们只是在排练一场戏叫
The Worst Parents Ever.
世上最糟糕的父母
It's going up at the Westchester Community Playhouse.
它会在韦斯特切斯特社区剧场上映
That's it. I've had it.
够了我受够了
Hey, I'll get you tickets. Who wants tickets?
嘿我可以给你们票谁想要
If you walk out that door,
你要是走出这扇门
I don't ever want to see you again!
就再也别想见到我
Is that a promise? Yes!
你能保证吗是的
Can I get that in writing?! Yes!
你能写张保证书吗行啊
Good luck, kiddo.
祝你好运孩子
I got to get out of here.
我要走了
Don't you dare.
你敢
Don't you dare.
你敢走
Don't you dare!
你真的敢走
Don't
不要
tell anybody at school about this, okay?
告诉学校里的任何人好吗
Oh, my God.
我的天哪
It's the root of all my party fears.
这就是我对派对恐惧的根源
Actually, it's the root of all my fears, period.
其实在过去的时间这是我所有恐惧的根源
Babe, you don't think that I get being afraid?
宝贝你以为我不恐惧吗
I wake up every morning in cold sweats
我每天早上吓出一身冷汗
worried that I'm wasting my entire life
担心我浪费了一辈子在一个男人身上
with a man who spends all his time with a barbershop quartet
而这个男人每天心尽所有心思在四重唱乐队上
called The West Brovinas.
乐队名叫西柯兄弟班
No, you never told me the name. Yes.
你从来没跟我提过啊是的
And my children... I mean, their only hope is
而我的孩子... 我是说他们就想着
that they get into a really good gang.
加入一个牛逼的帮派
I mean, honey, I am scared every day of my life.
亲爱的我是说我每天都活在恐惧里
But you can be brave. I know you can.
但你可以变得勇敢我知道你行的
All you got to do is stand up to your fears,
你要做的就是直面你的恐惧
do you understand?
你明白吗
I understand you in theory.
理论上我懂
Listen to me. His GF is out of town.
听着她女朋友出城了
The moment is now!
现在就是你的机会
Or is it, like, some time other than now?
或者也有可能不一定是现在啊
Like... Shh... !
可能... 嘘
♪ I used to be afraid ♪
♪ 我曾经对这个世界 ♪
♪ Of so much in this world ♪
♪ 感到无比恐惧 ♪
♪ I'd tiptoe through each day ♪
♪ 我每天过的小心翼翼 ♪
♪ Like some frightened little girl ♪
♪ 像一个受惊的小女孩 ♪
♪ Then one day I realized ♪
♪ 一天我突然意识到 ♪
♪ I can't just run and hide from life ♪
♪ 我不能再逃避生活 ♪
♪ Now if someone pulls a gun on me ♪
♪ 现在如果有人拿枪指着我 ♪
♪ I pull out my knife! ♪
♪ 我就掏出我的小刀 ♪
I don't follow.
我没跟到你说啥
Sit on my lap like I'm Santa and listen to me.
坐在我的腿上当我是圣诞老人听我给你说
♪ Face your fears ♪
♪ 直面恐惧 ♪
♪ Stare them down ♪
♪ 秒杀他们 ♪
♪ Don't be scared ♪
♪ 不要害怕 ♪
♪ Stand your ground ♪
♪ 坚定信念 ♪
♪ 'Cause nothing is as scary as it appears ♪
♪ 因为他们远没有看上去那么可怕 ♪
♪ All you gotta do is face your fears ♪
♪ 你要做的就是直面恐惧 ♪
Okay, I think I'm starting to get it... what you're talk...
好吧我觉得我开始明白... 你在说些
♪ If a bear runs at you in the woods ♪
♪ 如果丛林里一只熊朝你袭来 ♪
♪ Don't run away ♪
♪ 不要逃跑 ♪
Yeah, I'm back here. Sing to me.
好我在后面对着我唱
♪ Look it deep in the eyes ♪
♪ 看着它的眼睛 ♪
♪ Put your hand on its chest and say ♪
♪ 摸着它的胸说 ♪
♪ Bear, I'm not afraid ♪
♪ 熊大我可不怕你 ♪
Well, that's just dangerous.
那可很危险啊
♪ If you're in a burning building ♪
♪ 如果你在一栋燃烧的大楼里 ♪
♪ And smoke is everywhere ♪
♪ 浓烟四起时 ♪
♪ Keep calm, take a deep breath ♪
♪ 保持冷静深呼吸 ♪
♪ And stay right there! ♪
♪ 站在那里不要动 ♪
That's not how smoke or fire works. Shh.
要真着火了可不能这样嘘
♪ Face your fears ♪
♪ 直面恐惧 ♪
♪ Run with scissors ♪
♪ 夹缝求生 ♪
♪ 'Cause you can fly ♪
♪ 因为你能飞翔 ♪
♪ Yes, you can fly ♪
♪ 是的你能飞翔 ♪
♪ Fly out of a window ♪
♪ 飞出窗口 ♪
Who are you singing to?
你在对谁唱啊
♪ Fly off a building ♪
♪飞离大厦 ♪
♪ Just believe in yourself ♪
♪ 只要相信自己 ♪
♪ Face your fears ♪
♪ 直面恐惧 ♪