疯狂前女友（2015）

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend S01E10

Part 4 March 26, 2021, 2:36 p.m.

Don't tell me what to do!
别告诉我要做什么
Cabbage patch down!
椰菜娃娃倒了
"How... to get...
如何...让
girls to your party
美女们立刻参加
right now."
你的派对
"Sofistic8ed party casting"?
经验丰富的派对角色扮演
Do you need to crank your party up a notch?
想让你的派对上一个档次吗
Well, now there are hundreds of girls
那么现在有成百上千的姑娘
waiting to join the fun.
在等着你
Sofistic8ed party casting.
经验丰富的派对角色扮演
The premier party casting app on the market.
市场上第一个派对角色扮演的软件
You pay, they play.
你出钱她们出力
Get quality, upscale, classy, local female guests
高品质高水准的当地漂亮姑娘
to your party in under 30 minutes.
三十分钟内到达派对现场
Well, it's local.
很好是本地的
That's good for the economy.
有利于拉动本市经济增长
Turn your regular party
让你普通平凡的派对
into a sophisticated party.
摇身成为精致完美的派对
Number of girls.
姑娘的数量
Oh, gosh, I don't know.
噢天哪多少好呢
Um... 25?
额... 25
That's expensive.
这可不便宜啊
What looks good?
吃什么好呢
You sure you're okay?
你真的没事吗
Oh, this?
你说这个呀
Yeah, it's just some busted capillaries.
没事只是些毛细血管破裂
No big.
没什么大不了
So, um... hey, do you want to,
所以额... 嘿你想不想
like, go sit at a table somewhere?
找个地方坐坐
I've been craving some Josh Chan quality time.
我一直想和乔希·陈有些独处时光
Oh, I'd love to, but I got to sit with the boys.
噢我也想但我得和男孩们坐一起
You know how camp is, boys versus girls,
你知道露营的规则男孩一边女孩一边
girls have cooties, bleh.
你们女孩有虱子才不要碰
Right. Right, right.
对对对
I was thinking the same thing, like, ugh, you're so gross,
和我想的一样呢走开你个恶心鬼
get away from me.
别靠近我
Okay. I'll catch you...
好的我们再会
Yeah.
好吧
Hey, can I... Can I squeeze inskies?
嘿我能... 我能挤进来吗
Nope.
不行
I think it's just rachet.
我觉得根本是猥琐
I admire that confidence. It is crusty.
有个性我喜欢
Exactly. Nothing, right?
就是说啊没什么对吧
His name is Phil.
他叫菲尔
His name is Phil.
他叫菲尔
First sign. That should've been...
第一个迹象应该是在
Hey, I'm just gonna...
嘿我要
Can I, can I scoot in here? Can I scoot in here?
我能我能坐这儿吗我能坐这儿吗
You know what? I'm gonna be...
你知道吗我要
Sorry, I'm just gonna be confident like her.
不好意思我要和她一样耍性子了
I'm sorry, I'm just gonna be confident like her
对不起啦我要和她一样耍性子了啊
and I'm just gonna get in.
我就挤进来了
Great.
太好了
Hey, is anyone else
嘿有没有人
getting bitten up by mosquitoes around here?
在这附近被蚊子叮啊
Maybe it's just me with my sweet, sweet skin.
或许是因为我娇嫩芬芳的皮肤比较招蚊子吧
So I called him, then I texted him,
所以我就打给他了然后我还给他发了短♥信♥
then I Snapchatted him; Never heard back from him.
我还给他发了裸照之后就再也没有回音了
Next thing I know, he's on a waterslide with some skank.
后来我知道的就是他和一个婊♥子♥滑水去了
And he tagged me in the picture.
他还在照片里标记了我
No, he didn't! Yes!
他不是吧就是这样
That is so like him. He tagged me.
这太像他干的事了他标记了我
Are you kidding? Right?!
你没开玩笑对吧
So like him. Dumb!
太像他干的事了我无语了
You know what, that's, that's a crazy thing to do,
你知道吗这件事太疯狂了
but honestly, when we focus on men,
但说真的当我们专心于男人的时候
it just makes them more powerful.
这是会让他们更强大
So just forget this guy.
所以就忘了那个混♥蛋♥吧
I promise you, in ten years, you won't even remember him.
我保证十年之后你连他的名字都想不起来
# Baseball cap!
# 棒球帽
# Bandana!
# 大手帕
It's intentional.
他就是故意的
# Tear tattoo!
# 眼泪型纹身
I'm sorry, really quick question:
打扰一下问个小问题
Is there a place around here
这附近有哪儿
to take a photo?
能照相的吗
Like, away from everything else?
比如寂静无人的地方
To go into nature
小树林里
and just take a photo of myself, alone?
能让我一个人独自♥拍♥张照的
Good idea.
好主意
Go be alone.
滚边儿呆着去
Went there.
去吧
I really don't like this woman-on... look at me.
我真的很不喜欢这种女人敌... 看着我
I really don't like this woman-on-woman aggression.
我真的不喜欢这种女人敌视女人的气氛
Like, instead of cutting each other down,
这么说比起相互贬低敌视
we should be building each other up.
我们更应该团结起来互帮互助
Like Kayla... you, for instance, have a real air of gravitas.
就像凯拉你举个例子应该庄重一点
I do not.
我没有
I've been tested.
我试过了
Amen. She has been.
老天保佑她有过
Several times. Yeah.
好几次呢对啊
That's not what an air of grav... never mind.
我不是这个意思算了
Let's circle back to the photo.
我们还是来说拍照的事吧
Where can I take a photo?
这里哪儿能拍照
Well, there's Blowie Point at the top of the hill.
好吧山顶有个风点
Blowie point? Oh, 'cause it's windy?
风点因为那儿常刮风吗
Yup.
是的
So windy it knocks you to your knees.
风 "大" 到能 "吹" 得你站不起来
That's a hazard.
那太危险了
We should put handrails up there.
我们应该在那儿装个扶手
Okay, well, I'll bring my windbreaker.
好吧我会带上我的风衣
Uh, thank you, sister friends.
谢谢你们姐们儿
Girl power.
女权至上
Bye. Bye.
拜拜
Now, this is a party.
这才像个派对嘛
You really came through, D-dawg.
你做到了达狗
D-dawg.
达狗
Right? Oh, yeah.
对吧是啊
Darryl just barked like a dog.
达里尔刚才竟然学狗叫
Are we sure he's not... He's okay?
你确定他... 他没事
He may not be.
还真不一定
There's, uh...
这里额
A lot of girls here, dude.
有好多姑娘啊老兄
Yeah, but men spend too much time thinking about women.
是的但是男人花太多时间在女人身上了
We should spend more time
我们应该花更多时间
in-in drum circles,
在在鼓乐上
in wielding swords, in chopping wood...
在挥剑砍木头上
What are we talking about, man?
我们在说啥啊老兄
Wait a minute.
等等
Is that... ?
那是不是
Whoa. Ashley Pratt.
天哪阿什莉·普拉特
Dude, you were in love with her since, like...
老兄你多少年前就爱上她了吧像是
Kindergarten.
幼儿园的时候
She's perfect.
她太完美了
That is the perfect woman.
这才是完美的女人
Ashley would never come to our parties in high school.
高中的时候阿什莉绝对不会来我们的派对
She's an actress in L.A. now, did you know that?
她现在是洛杉矶的演员了你知道吗
She played a sexy barista on Last Man Standing
她在 "最后的男人" 中饰演一个性感的咖啡师
and then a sad barista
后来在 "明星伙伴" 中
in the Entourage movie... Okay.
饰演了一个悲伤的咖啡师好吧