疯狂前女友（2015）

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend S01E03

Part 7 March 26, 2021, 2:33 p.m.

Ha-ha! Then we post this puppy online.
哈哈接着我们吧这张萌照发到网上
"This house
"这座房♥子
is on fire!"
被我们的热情燃烧"
Exclam-Exclamation point. Ah... send!
加个感叹号♥ 啊哈发送
Then we see what happens. Huh.
接下来我们就看看会发生什么哈
Who's ready to party... ?!
谁准备去派对疯狂一把
You got dice?
你有骰子吗
I can find some!
我给你找
Oh, uh, this is Arielle
这是阿丽儿
and Chuck.
和查克
And this guy!
这家伙是
Hi. What-What's his name?
你好他的名字是什么来着
I don't know, I just call him "this guy"
我不知道我只是叫他 "这家伙"
I've known him since kindergarten.
我从幼儿园就认识他了
Yeah, I'm just so bad in school.
是的在学校里我表现可差了
Dude, let me tell you something right now.
兄弟让我现在跟你说些事
Being good at school means nothing.
在学校里表现得好没有任何意义
Like, see her?
比如你看看她
Oh, do it, do it! You got it!
噢快点快点你做到了
She went to Harvard.
她上的哈佛
Okay?
好吧
And she's a mess.
而且她现在一团糟
Yeah. Dude,
是的兄弟
I was horrible at school,
我在学校表现得很糟
but that's because
但那是因为
instead of reading their stupid books,
我没有去读那些蠢透了的书
I was busy reading everything Salinger ever wrote.
而是一直忙着看塞林格的作品
And you're, like,
你现在
totally successful and rich now, right?
完全是既成功又有钱啊对不对
Not at all.
一点也不
But I'm cool,
但是我很酷
and that's what really matters.
这才是真正重要的事
I like you. I like you so...
我喜欢你我喜欢你
I, can I... can I just,
我可以我可以
just grab it? There you go. It's fine.
就抓它一下吗好吧挺好
It's my personal boundaries...
这是我的底线
We're fine. I swallowed the barf!
我们挺好我吞下呕吐物了
Oh, she swallowed the barf!
哎呀她吞了呕吐物
I swallowed my barf!
我吞下了呕吐物
She swallowed the barf!
她吞下了呕吐物
Oh!
噢
Oh! Oh, my God.
噢噢天哪
You know, at first, I had my doubts about this party.
你要知道起先我对这个派对还有些怀疑
I mean, it's no Weekend Tuesday,
我意思是当然不及周末礼物二精彩
you know what I'm saying?
你明白我的意思吧
But now? I mean, this is a blast.
但现在真的是超赞的
Oh, and I even met this great girl Megan
噢我甚至还遇见了梅根这个超级棒的女孩
who said she found your flyer in a gutter.
她说她在排水沟里发现了你的传♥单♥
Oh, she's such a good listener.
噢她真是善于聆听
And I told her all about my divorce.
并且我告诉了她关于我离婚的所有事
But I think she's from England, because, I mean,
但我觉得她是英国人因为我是说
her teeth are not good. But she gave me
她的牙不太好看但她给了我这根
this terrific menthol cigarette.
棒极了的薄荷香烟
I think Megan might be a meth addict.
我觉得梅根可能对是个瘾君子
Oh, yeah? I think you maybe just smoked meth.
哦是吗我觉得你可能刚刚吸的是冰♥毒♥
Oh. Okay. Well, you know, that'd explain
噢是的好吧要知道这解释了
why I've been digging a hole in the backyard
我在过去一小时里
for the last hour. But it's still fun!
一直在后院挖洞但仍然充满乐趣
Hey, Megan, honey,
嘿梅根我的宝贝儿
let's clean something.
我们去打扫打扫吧
This party is a real who's-who of...
这个派对真的很多我不认识的
who?
人
Well, if it isn't Mr. I Can't Come to Your Party
好吧如果不是"我不去你的派对
Because I Have a Bunch of Complicated Reasons,
因为我有一堆复杂的理由
I Probably Have to Buy More Black Clothing,
我可能要去买♥♥几件黑衫黑裤
Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah.
什么什么什么的"先生
That's a long name I have. Polish?
这名字可真长波兰名字吗
All right.
好了
Sincerely, thank you for coming.
由衷地非常感谢你今天来
It means a lot to me that you're here.
你在这里对我意义非凡
Well, you took all my customers.
好吧你把我的顾客全抢走了
I usually get the gamblers after their meeting.
我经常找到一些聚在一起的赌徒
Then I started thinking,
接着我开始思考
"I've got to show up to this party to see
我要去这个派对上看看
in what gruesome way it could all go wrong."
到底这个派对会怎样被搞垮
I figured at least a Porch collapse.
我想至少要让整个房♥子倒下才会被搞垮
But, now that I'm here...
但是现在我在这里
It's not that bad. Yeah,
这没那么糟是的
it's pretty great, right?
这非常棒对不对
And I have one person to thank for that.
为此我有一个要感谢的人
Hey, girl.
你好姑娘
I know that as a kid you never got to see
我知道你小时候从没看过
that boy band concert on pay-per-view.
那乐队在付费电视台的演唱会
But it's okay.
但没关系
Because I'm here now.
因为我就在这里
And I'm all the boy band you'll ever need.
而且我就是你曾需要的所有男孩乐队
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ 噢噢噢噢 ♪
♪ Girl, I know things haven't always ♪
♪ 女孩我知道你的生活 ♪
♪ Been so easy for you ♪
♪ 并非总是一帆风顺 ♪
♪ Kids were mean and your daddy ♪
♪ 孩子们都尖酸刻薄 ♪
♪ Walked right out the door, too ♪
♪ 而你的父亲也把你置之不理♪
♪ Maybe we should have a session ♪
♪ 或许我们该找个时间 ♪
♪ Address your anxiety and depression ♪
♪ 抒发你焦虑和失落的心情 ♪
♪ 'Cause I got a funny feeling if we do ♪
♪ 因为这样我会有种怪怪的感觉 ♪
♪ Baby, you can ♪
♪ 宝贝儿你可以 ♪
♪ Kiss all your childhood traumas goodbye ♪
♪ 吻别你所有的童年创伤 ♪
♪ You're never gonna miss ♪
♪ 你永远不会再想起 ♪
♪ All that stress you've been ♪
♪ 你从前独自在心里 ♪
♪ Keeping inside ♪
♪ 所面对的压力 ♪
♪ All your psychological problems ♪
♪ 你所有的精神问题 ♪
♪ Girl, we're gonna solve them ♪
♪ 姑娘我们会把一切解决 ♪
♪ 'Cause we're not just a boy band ♪
♪ 因为我们不单单是 ♪
♪ Made up of four Joshes ♪
♪ 由四个乔希组成的乐队 ♪
♪ We're also a team of licensed ♪
♪ 我们同样是合资格的 ♪
♪ Mental health professionals ♪
♪ 精神健康专业团队 ♪
♪ We'll help you ♪
♪ 我们一定帮助到你 ♪
♪ Understand the reasons ♪
♪ 了解为啥你妈 ♪
♪ That your mom made you sad ♪
♪ 总会惹你伤心的原因 ♪
♪ And why every man you date ♪
♪ 还有为啥每个跟你约会的男人 ♪
♪ Is just a stand-in for your dad ♪
♪ 也跟你♥爸♥一样离你而去 ♪
♪ You'll stop revisiting your fears ♪
♪ 一旦我们把你的泪擦干之后 ♪
♪ Once we wipe away your tears ♪
♪ 你将不会重访你心里的恐惧 ♪
♪ Trust us, girl, your prognosis isn't bad ♪
♪ 相信我们姑娘你的未来并不糟糕 ♪
♪ Baby, you can kiss ♪
♪ 宝贝儿你可以和 ♪
♪ All your unexplained ♪
♪ 所有解释不清的症状 ♪
♪ Symptoms good-bye ♪
♪ 说声吻别 ♪
♪ You're never gonna miss all those nightmares ♪
♪ 你不会想念过去那些 ♪
♪ In which you tend to die ♪
♪ 曾经让你轻生的噩梦 ♪
♪ We'll get you through those developmental stages ♪
♪ 我们会让你安然度过 ♪
♪ That you've been stuck in for ages ♪
♪ 你一直被困其中的成长阶段 ♪
♪ 'Cause we're not just ♪
♪ 因为我们不单单是 ♪
♪ A boy band made up of four Joshes ♪
♪ 由四个乔希组成的乐队 ♪
♪ We're also a team of nationally recognized ♪
♪ 我们还是被全国认可的 ♪
♪ Mental health professionals ♪
♪ 精神健康专家 ♪
♪ Trained in cognitive behavioral therapy ♪
♪ 专门训练来给你进行治疗 ♪
♪ With specialties in ♪
♪ 人格障碍 ♪
♪ Personality and sleep disorders ♪
♪ 和失眠问题 ♪
♪ And love. ♪
♪ 还有爱情问题 ♪
And the guy is like, "Me, I'm fine.
那个家伙就像说 "我我很好
See that girl over there"
看看那边的那个女孩吧"