神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E23

Part 4 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:06 p.m.

I say we follow him for a mile.
明白
Copy that.
你在你妈妈三月二十六日的生日上送她的手♥机♥
How's your mom enjoying the new phone you got her
她用着顺不顺手啊
for her birthday on March 16th?
哥们别靠胡诌以前的事情来跟我套近乎
Dude, stop saying random facts to try to prove you know me.
我才没有套近乎呐
That's not what I'm doing.
我只是在和好朋友Rosa聊聊天
I'm simply making small talk with my friend Rosa,
话说她玩过高空跳伞
who went skydiving once.
够了
Enough!
我会去那个白♥痴♥派对的
I'm going to the dumb party
但只是因为我不想伤Marcus的心而已
but only because I don't want to hurt Marcus.
别以为我已经不生你的气了
I'm still super mad at you.
你是不是也还因为<吉尔莫女孩>的大结局生气啊
Mm, like how you're still super mad at Gilmore Girls for how the finale went down?
<吉尔莫女孩> 华纳兄弟推出的一部有关家庭、友情和爱情的系列电视剧
我就是想看到Lorelai得到幸福
I just want to see Lorelai happy,
Lorelai 剧中的叛逆女性
你给我闭嘴
and shut up!
你看吧
Ah, see?
我和你都这么熟了我就知道会这
I knew you so well, I knew it was co...
说真的我们啥事都没有吧
Hey, seriously, we're cool, right?
那当然
Yeah, totally.
我们很好 - 好
We're fine. - Good.
天哪肚子都有点饿了
Gosh, you know, I'm actually a little bit hungry.
在那个蛋疼的高级餐厅里我一口饭都没吃
I never ended up eating at that dumb fancy restaurant.
你猜我回家的时候会吃点什么
You know what I'm getting on my way home?
你肯定是去路上的波兰餐厅
Yeah, you're gonna go to the Polish place
吃波兰饺子土豆煎饼还有一杯热巧克力
and get perogies, potato pancakes, and a cup of hot chocolate.
你说的一点儿没错
That's exactly what I'm gonna get.
那可不
Yeah.
我打算吃披萨
I will be having pizza,
来两块托尼披萨店的至尊红肉披萨
two slices of meat supreme from Tony's,
就要刚从展台上拿下来的温度
served display temperature.
至尊红肉披萨已经够可怕的了
Meat supreme is a million red flags,
你凉着吃是想逆天吗
and eating it cold is just insane.
不不不并不是凉着吃
No, no, no. It's not cold.
而是刚从展台上拿下来的温度 - Jake
It's display temperature. - Jake.
Amy 这中间还是有区别的
There's a difference, Amy.
不是 Jake 他在盯着我们看
No, Jake, he's looking at us.
那就这只好这样了
Well, this is happening.
纽约警局不许动
NYPD! Freeze!
我们是警局同事
We are police colleagues!
你被捕了
You're under arrest.
这可是工作场合
This is a work event.
你签一下对Augustine和买♥♥家的逮捕报告吧
Hey, can you sign this arrest report for Augustine and the buyer?
没问题
Sure.
好的
Great.
我都忘了你签字要花上多长时间了
Man, I forgot how long your signature takes.
请容我马上用手♥机♥看完<勇敢的心>
I'm just gonna watch Braveheart on my phone real quick.
<勇敢的心> 梅尔·吉布森执导的战争片
鉴于现状
Given the circumstances,
我知道刚才的事情看起来很像是调情
I could see how that might have seemed like flirty teasing or something,
但我当时真的很不满
but I was legit being critical.
你要摊上大事了
You have a problem.
不对这话现在听着都像在开玩笑
No, even that sounded like banter now.
好吧我只有一条出路了
All right, there's only one way out of this for me.
我会变得超级残忍♥
I just got to get super cruel.
准备好被我指出生理缺陷吧 Amy
Prepare to have your physical flaws pointed out, Amy.
瞧你那高高的屁♥股♥和诡异的胳膊肘
I'm talking about your tall butt and your weird elbows.
Jake 没关系的
Jake, it's okay.
多谢
Thank you.
今晚真是太奇怪了
This whole night was really weird.
没错啊
I know.
我只是
I just...
真希望我们可以回到从前
I want everything to go back how it was, you know?
这是在太尴尬了
It's so awkward.
没错 - 你说得对
Yeah. - And you're right.
我们不应该和警♥察♥谈对象
We shouldn't date cops,
因为我们是个很厉害的团队
'cause we're a great team.
我们在一起工作得很好
We work great together.
我不想把这种关系搞砸
I don't want to mess that up.
是啊我也不想这些事都变味儿
Yeah, I don't want everything to change.
我也不想
Yeah, me neither.
好啊那么一言为定了
Okay, then that's that,
Peralta探员
Detective Peralta.
Santiago探员
Detective Santiago.
片区里再见了
See you around the precinct.
是的
Yep.
高高的屁♥股♥
Tall butt.
好在我们进去之前
Okay, before we go in,
记得一定要装出惊喜的样子
remember you have to pretend to be surprised.
这个怎么样
How's this?
天惹噜
Oh, my God.
这比我想象中的还要蛋疼哟
It's so much worse than I imagined.
你这精神面貌很好但是传达的信息不太对
The energy was great, but the message was flawed.
得了吧赶紧进去就完事了
All right, let's get this over with.
惊喜哟
Surprise.
什么情况
What's going on?
我租下了整个酒吧
I rented this entire bar
这样我们就可以边庆祝边享受二人世界了
so you and I could celebrate with no people anywhere near us.
话说我倒是该雇个酒保的
I probably should have hired a bartender, though.
我根本不会调酒
I have no idea how to make drinks.
太不可思议了
This is incredible.
这些都是Charles的点子
It was all Charles' idea.
都说了我懂你的 Roro
I told you I knew you, Ro-ro.
谢谢你
Thank you.
再敢叫老娘一句"Roro"试试
But never call me "Ro-ro" Again.
试试就试试
Oh, but I will.
这是我应得的报偿
I've earned this.
生日快乐呀 Roro
Happy b-day, Ro-ro.
欢迎光临 Madeline 你打好主意了吗
Welcome, Madeline. Have you thought things over?
打好了
I have,
但首先我怎么知道你是不是带了窃听器
but first, how do I know you're not wearing a wire?
8分钟后
于是我把事情想了一遍
So I've thought it over,
还是让你把那封信交给局长好了
and perhaps you should go ahead and show that letter to the commissioner.
让他炒了你吗
And let him fire you?
我会否认信是我写的
I'll deny I wrote it.
认证调查将花上几个月的时间
It will take months to authenticate,
那么我就会有足够的时间
which will give me plenty of time
来给这里做一些人事调整
to make some personnel changes around here.
布莱顿海滩那边正好缺一个警探
There's an opening for a detective down in Brighton Beach.
我就把Diaz调过去好了
I think I'll transfer Diaz there.
然后把Boyle探员调到长岛市
Detective Boyle I'll send to Long Island City.
Santiago一定很适合佩兰港
Santiago will be a great fit for Pelham Bay.
还有你的心头肉 Peralta
And Peralta, your little pet project,
我会把他输送到史泰登岛去
I'm gonna ship him off to Staten Island.
但愿他喜欢去英勇阻止日光浴沙龙间的斗拳
Hope he likes breaking up tanning salon fistfights.
看来轮到你做出决断了呢 Raymond
Looks like you've got a decision to make, Raymond.
你打算怎样
What are you gonna do?
队员们请听我说几句
Squad, if I could have your attention please?
我要被调到公♥关♥部了
I am being transferred to the public relations office.
我会当即离开九九片区
I'm leaving the Nine-Nine effective immediately.
什么鬼啊
What the hell?
我没懂你说什么
I don't understand.
什么鬼啊
What the hell?
你为什么要这样
Why are you doing this?
什么鬼啊啊啊
What the hell?
我想说
I want to say
非常荣幸能在过去的二十一又二分之一个月里和诸位共事
it has been a pleasure to have worked alongside all of you for the past 21 1/2 months.
希望大家能谅解我这无法控制的情绪
I'm sorry for getting so emotional.
其实你这语气和以前是一样的
A pretty consistent tone, actually.
这几年是
These have been the...
这几年是我的职业生涯中最美好的时光