神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E08

Part 4 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:03 p.m.

What's going on?
我是在梦里吗
Is this a dream?
不对啊我手上没有标签打印机
No, I'm not holding a label maker.
在萨满面前请保持安静
Silence before the shaman.
Amy 我将掌管你远离烟瘾的旅程
Amy, I'm taking charge of your journey away from addiction.
Gina会带领你冥想
Gina is leading you on a guided meditation.
我和Terry同意一起参与
Terry and I agreed to participate
以示支持
as a show of support.
好吧
Okay.
还有 Amy 也许你不知道这事
And, Amy, you don't know this
因为我不太常和你说话
'cause I don't necessarily enjoy talking to you,
我在二十岁出头的时候也跟瘾症做过斗争
but in my early 20s, I too battled an addiction.
我有购物强迫症
I was a compulsive shopper.
冥想帮助我远离了购物瘾
Anyway, meditation helped me past that addiction.
它也能帮助你
And it's gonna do the same for you.
闭上眼睛跟我念
Close your eyes and repeat:
我在一个宽敞的走廊里
I am in a vast hallway.
我在一个宽敞的走廊里
I am in a vast hallway.
我正在走向自我实现的光芒中
I walk into the light of self-actualization.
我正在走向自我实现的光芒中
I walk into the light of self-actualization.
因为我是个强大的女人
For I am a powerful woman.
因为我是个强大的女人
For I am a powerful woman.
有人没张嘴说哦
I'm not hearing everyone.
因为我是个强大的女人
For I am a powerful woman.
你们感受到了一阵凉爽的启示之风
You feel the cool breeze of enlightenment
温柔地吹抚着你们的脸颊
gently caressing your face.
我感觉到了
I feel it!
我感觉到微风了
I feel the breeze.
Amy
Amy!
干嘛我没张开眼睛啊
What? I'm not the one with my eyes open.
你才玩赖
Cheater!
警监玩赖
Captain Holt is cheating.
Santiago 我们是想要帮你
Santiago, we're trying to help you.
我做不到
I can't do it.
我放弃戒烟了
I quit quitting.
各位各位
Hey, hey, people.
我们的特遣队终于完成了一次成功的抓获
Task force, officially on the scoreboard with our first major giggle pig dealer busted.
好好待他
Treat him well.
这家伙的被捕情况跟Mitch Globmun差不多
This guy is sort of the Mitch Globmun of getting put in jail for this.
Globmun是我们年级第一个长阴毛的小孩
Globmun was the first kid in my grade to get a pube.
Rosa 好消息我的朋友
Rosa, great news, my friend!
怎么回事啊
What the hell?
Donger刚刚打电♥话♥来说你抛弃了他
Donger just called and said you abandoned him,
在机密的电脑上窃取了信息
took information from a classified computer,
还舔了所有的古董邮票
and licked a roll of antique stamps.
舔邮票这事是我♥干♥的
The stamps were on me.
我好奇以前的胶水是什么味的
I was curious about how old glue tasted.
答案是像马肉♥棒♥棒糖
Answer like a horse lollipop.
嗯
Mm.
听着这没什么大不了的
Look, it's not a big deal.
Donger打算让我们浪费一周的时间去盯邮筒
Donger wanted us to waste a week staring at mailboxes.
如果我听了他的我永远都不可能抓住Delroy
If I'd listened to him, I never would have caught Delroy.
也不可能找到他的笔记本上面写着
Or found his books, which tell us
今晚将有大批的猪咯咯运过来
there's a huge giggle pig shipment coming in tonight.
我让你跟美邮检合作
I told you to work with USPIS.
好吧我知道我没有完全按你的命令做事
Okay, I know I didn't do it exactly the way you asked me to...
我是以特遣队队长的身份命令你的
The way I ordered you to as leader of the task force.
你觉得因为我们是朋友
Do you think just because we're friends
你就可以随心所欲吗
you can do whatever you want?
Donger很生气他正在来这里的路上
Donger's furious. He's on his way over here now
因为他要接手这个案子了
because they're taking over the case.
什么他不能这样吧
What! He can't do that.
不他可以
Yeah, he can.
因为他们是联邦机构
They're a federal agency.
从今以后任何关于这个案子的搜捕行动
From now on, any bust that comes from this,
包括Delroy 都由美邮检负责
including Delroy, goes to USPIS.
我的特遣队啥也干不了还真是谢谢你了朋友
My task force gets nothing. So thanks, friend.
这桌子尝起来像Scully手肘上的水疱
This table tastes like Scully's elbow blisters.
好恶心但是我应得的
It's horrible and I deserve it.
我讨厌看到你这样子
I hate seeing you like this.
Rosa确实该生我的气
Rosa has every right to be pissed at me.
我没按她的命令办事毁了她的特遣队
I didn't follow her orders and I messed up the task force.
挽回这事的唯一办法
The only way to make things right
就是去做我能想到的最可怕的事
is to do the worst, most awful thing imaginable.
把你的小♥弟♥弟♥泡进醋里吗
Dip your penis in vinegar.
什么鬼啊不是
What? No!
你这么会想到这个
Why would you say that?
在主日学校里他们告诉我们
In sunday school, they told us
古巴比伦人就是这样对他们的敌人的
the babylonians did that to their enemies.
从那以后我就超级害怕这个
I've been terrified ever since.
好吧我要做的事比这个还要可怕很多
Okay, well, what I have to do is far, far worse.
对不起我是个混♥蛋♥
I'm sorry I was a jerk.
抱歉我之前说邮递员已经过气了
I'm sorry I said the postman was a flop.
抱歉我之前说"永久邮票"是个谎言
I'm sorry I said "Forever" Stamps are a lie
Forever Stamps 美国邮政发行的一种邮票无论邮费怎么涨都可以用
因为地球最终会被太阳吞噬
because the earth will eventually be swallowed by the sun.
我知道你安的什么心
I know what you're trying to do
我才不买♥♥账呢
and I'm not buying it for a second.
我不信你真的抱歉也不信你尊重美邮检
I don't think you're sorry and I don't think you respect USPIS.
也许一开始不是但那是在我读了
Maybe at first, but that was before I read,
<贴走犯罪:美邮检的历史> 这个册子之前的事了
Stamping out Crime : A history of the USPIS."
噢选得好
Oh, great read!
是啊
Yeah.
但它的介绍还不够全面
But it actually just scratches the surface.
真正的故事是从16世纪的法国邮局开始的
The real story begins in the 16th century with la poste francaise.
你们想听不
Do you wanna hear about it?
当然快跟我们讲这故事
Absolutely. Please tell us that story.
不要省略任何细节
And spare no detail.
简直跟泡醋一样可怕
The vinegar dip.
美邮检的历史故事从这一时期开始变得非常精彩
But this is when USPIS history gets really good.
他们真的把总部从华盛顿特区搬回了波士顿
They actually moved the headquarters back to Boston from Washington D.C.
让我们先来到1820年
Let's jump ahead to 1820...
等等你打算就这样跳过整整十年吗
Wait, you're just gonna jump a whole decade?
我意思是我超想知道
I mean, I'm dying to know
邮政检察长他生病的妻子
how the chief postal inspector's sickly wife
是怎么适应新英格兰区的严冬的
adjusted to the cold New England winters.
好吧 Peralta 我接受你的道歉
Okay, Peralta, I accept your apology.
你可以把案子领回去
You can have the case back.
太谢谢了
Oh, thank you.
其实我需要一些帮助
Truth is, I need some help.
Delroy不肯告诉我们今晚的货物会运去哪里
Delroy won't tell us where the shipment's going tonight
他的笔记都是用密♥码♥写的
and his notebooks are all in code.
你看看
Have a look.
你们追查了这个电♥话♥号♥码吗
Have you checked out this phone number?
是空号♥
It doesn't exist.
10位数字除了号♥码还能是什么呢
Ten digits, what else could it be?
两个连在一起的邮编
Two zip codes back-to-back.
但都不在这附近
But they're nowhere near here.
27889 那是北卡罗来纳州的华盛顿市
27889, that's Washington, north Carolina.
80751 那是科罗拉多州的斯特林市
80751, that's sterling, Colorado.
斯特林镇(纽约州)和华盛顿大道(布鲁克林区)
Sterling place and Washington Avenue.
等一下邮递员先生
Wait a minute, Mr. Postman!
经典歌♥曲中歌♥词
那就是猪咯咯会被送到的地方吗
That's where the giggle pig delivery's gonna be?
对咱们该走了马上
Yup. We gotta go, right now.
你能别咬了吗
Could you please knock it off?
我感觉像在海狸坝里工作一样
It's like working inside a beaver dam.
哦不这种领导要谈心的架势
Oh no, a next-to-desk-sit-down.
Santiago 你给自己太大压力了
Santiago, you're putting yourself under too much pressure.
这种压力反而让你更难戒烟
And that stress is making it even harder for you to quit.
也许当你不再是个完美主义者的时候
Some things might come easier to you
事情会变得更容易