神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E08

Part 2 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:03 p.m.

我可以把它们的地址找出来发给你
I can find out where they are and send you the locations.
那真是太好了来我的电子邮箱是
That would be great. Here, my email is...
哈呵呵不要用电邮
Ha! Uh-hahaha, no email.
我会用"真邮"发给你
I'll send it to you with r-mail,
也就是真正的邮件
which is to say, real mail,
因为电邮我的几百号♥同事都丢了饭碗
because email has put hundreds of my coworkers out of work.
自己的兄弟被扫地出门
How would you like it if they laid off
再由机器警♥察♥取代的滋味你们可曾知道
all of your fellow detectives and partnered you with a robocop?
我真的有画过机器警♥察♥的草图呢
I've literally drawn sketches of that.
机器警♥察♥有个能装下我的背包
The robot has a backpack that can carry me.
嗨烟戒得怎样了
Hey, how's cold turkey going?
我听说嚼口香糖管用
I heard chewing gum helps.
虽然我从没吸过烟但我也是上过瘾的人
You know, I never smoked, but I did once have an addiction.
暴食场面异常惨烈
Food... it got bad.
你们怎么能打烊
You're not closed!
这才六点钟啊
It's six o'clock!
哥要吃木须肉
I need my mushu pork!
给哥木须喔
I need my mushu...Oh!
你知道我是怎么停止暴饮暴食的吗
You know how I finally stopped eating?
你是胖到挤不进厨房♥门了吗
You got too big to fit through the kitchen door?
我学会了压制自己的欲望
I learned how to beat my cravings.
我一旦想吃东西了就会重启自己的系统
Every time I wanted food, I rebooted my system.
准备好重启了吗
Are you ready to reboot?
每当我有了食欲
When I'd feel a food craving,
我就会一头扎进冰水里并重启大脑
I would dunk my head into ice water and reset my brain.
看好了
Watch me.
呼
Whoo!
感觉好爽
I'm all good!
赞该你了
Yeah! You try!
好吧 - 马上
Okay. - Now!
再来一次
Do it again!
好冷啊真的好冷啊
It's so cold! It's really cold!
最后一次
Last time.
我们觉得毒贩在利用这些旧邮筒
We think the drug dealers have been using these out-of-service mailboxes
进行猪咯咯的钱物交易
as drops for giggle pig and money.
干得好 Danger帮上忙了可真好
Good job. I'm glad Danger was useful.
其实是叫"裆儿"
Actually, it's "Dong-er."
尽管他更应该叫"裆炸"
Although it should be "Dong-est."
这人真是世界上独一无二的裆炸奇葩
Can't imagine anyone being more dong than this guy.
听起来他能帮上很大忙啊
Sounds like he was a good resource.
他告诉你们邮筒都在哪里了吧
He showed you where the mailboxes were, right?
说了但他还告诉我们
Yeah, but he also told us
他是如何缉拿了一个蜗牛走私团伙
how he brought down a snail-smuggling ring...
长达一小时
for an hour.
对他给我们看了那些蜗牛的照片
Yeah, he showed us all these pictures of the snails,
还把它们叫做"最小的受害人"
and he called them "The littlest victims."
好吧但愿Donger以后不会这么烦人
Well, hopefully Donger will be less annoying from now on.
是啊但愿吧
Yeah, hopefully.
等等 "以后"
Wait, "From now on"?
没错 - 别
Yeah. - No.
就是这样 - 别别别别
Yup. - No, no, no, no.
千万别告诉我我还要跟那个人一起工作
Please tell me I don't have to keep working with that...
Peralta探员
Detective Peralta.
嗨
Hi.
你们的片区不错嘛
Love your precinct.
非常有原始风格
Very primitive.
在美邮检每个人都有自己的办公室
At USPIS, everyone gets his own office,
不过那也是因为
but that's because
我们是这个国家反恐斗争的第一道防线嘛
we're this proud nation's first defense in the war on terror.
每一个包裹都是基♥地♥组♥织♥潜在目标
Every envelope is a potential target for Al-Qaeda.
噢
Oh.
Rosa Diaz警探这是我的新搭档 Jack donger
Detective Rosa Diaz, meet my new partner, Jack donger.
请叫我Jackie
Please, I go by Jackie.
Jackie donger(玩屌♥·自♥拍♥)
Jackie donger.
当然啦
Of course you do.
<华♥盛♥顿♥邮♥报♥进行曲>
哼起来(把它拿走) Peralta
Take it away, Peralta.
遵命
Will do.
你不该那么做的
Shouldn't have done that.
B面可是有些Sousa难找的金曲呢
B-side's got some banging sousa deep cuts.
美国♥军♥人/作曲家/指挥家 <华♥盛♥顿♥邮♥报♥进行曲>创作者
感谢上天终于到了看那边有个邮筒
Thank God we're here. Look, there's a box up there.
是啊那养眼优美的绿色曲线啊
Oh, yeah, that is some sweet green curves right there.
我们应该和那个卖♥♥炸肉丸子的小贩聊聊
We should talk to the falafel guy,
看看有没有什么可疑情况
see if he's seen anything suspicious.
你们应该让我来主导谈话
Uh, you should probably let me take lead on this.
很多人都不喜欢警♥察♥
A lot of people don't like cops,
但是人人都喜欢邮递员
but everybody loves postal workers.
是吗
They do?
所以才有这么一个说法
That's why the phrase most associated
选择"邮政化" 幸福千万家
with bringing goodness into people's lives is "Going postal."
你在开玩笑对吧
You're kidding, right?
"去邮局"其实是指(发疯)
"Going postal" Means that...
我知道是什么意思
I know what it means!
我刚说过它的意思了那就是它的意思
I just said what it means. That's what it means.
好吧
Okay.
我们何不全都避免和人交谈
Well, how about we avoid human contact altogether
直接去查看邮筒呢
and check out the box?
这东西有什么意义
What's the point of that thing?
传统又安全
Tradition and security.
而且如果我说这看起来不酷那我就是在骗人了
Plus, I'd be lying if I said it didn't look insanely cool.
我就不会这么说
I wouldn't.
中奖了是猪咯咯
Jackpot. It's giggle pig.
太好了
Yes!
你光荣地服务了你的国家女士
You have served your country proud, little lady.
站住
Stop!
哇
Whoa!
嗷嗷嗷扶我起来
Ow, ow, ow, help me up!
Peralta 救我扶我起来
Peralta, help! Help me up.
别抛下我
Don't ditch me!
他跑了
He's gone.
你还好吗
You okay?
不好我气坏了
No, I'm rattled.
嘿 - 嗯
Hey. - Hmm?
你要去哪儿 Amy
Where you going, Amy?
我只是到外面去
Oh, I was just going outside to...
看看我训练的鸽子
See this pigeon I've been training.
它会跳康康舞呢
It does the can-can.
那我可得看看
That I gotta see!
该死我把谎编得太诱人了
Damn it. I made my lie too enticing.
好啦我是要出去抽烟
Fine, I was going out to smoke.
你那个无聊的系统重启方法根本没用
Your lame system-reboot thing didn't work.
知道吗我不想提这件事的
You know, I don't like to talk about this,
很多年前我自己战胜过一个瘾症
but many years ago, I myself overcame an addiction.
我当时赌马赌得停不下来
I could not get enough of the ponies.
冲啊华丽辣子马
Go, razzmataz.
冲啊华丽辣子马冲啊华丽辣子马
Go, razzmataz. Go, razzmataz.
是号♥角手以一个头的优势取得胜利
It's bugle boy, winning by a head.
我输光了
I lost everything.
对我来说有效的方法是用一个好的瘾头
What worked for me was replacing my bad addiction
来取代坏的瘾头
with a good addiction...
锻炼
Exercise.
拿上你的运动鞋 Santiago
Grab your sneakers, Santiago.
你要跟我一起去午休慢跑了
You're going me on a lunchtime jog.
太好了我们可以小聊一下
Great! We can talk a little,
谈谈工作巩固一下师徒感情
chat about the job, do some mentor-mentee bonding.
我们会在无声中慢跑
We will exercise in silence.
也不能戴耳机
No headphones either.
听音乐也会产生依赖
Music is a crutch.
不好意思让我来理清一下
I'm sorry, let me get this straight.
猪咯咯贩子当时离你们只有20码
You had a giggle pig supplier 20 yards from you,