神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E13

Part 5 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:04 p.m.

No, no. I'm still good.
瞧这个
Check this out.
右勾拳右勾拳上勾拳
Right hook, right hook, uppercut.
看起来我的手臂已经不听大脑使唤了
My arms don't seem to be responding to my brain anymore.
错误
Nope.
呃该死真是恨死了
Ugh! God, I hate how hard it is
猜中别人的密♥码♥居然这么难
to guess other people's passwords.
等等大伙等一下
Wait! Everyone, wait!
试试"酸奶"
Try "Yogurt."
进去了
We're in!
Terry爱死酸奶了
Terry loves yogurt.
加油 Jake 上啊
Come on, Jake! Let's go!
你平常干这个的时候嘴里一般会有
So how much blood do you usually have in your mouth
多大一口老血呢
when you do this?
一点也没有
None.
棒极了我不干了
Great, I'm done.
这回健身棒极了警长
Great workout, sarge.
Boyle 我得扔掉这张纸
Ah, Boyle, I need to throw away this piece of paper
但我动不了了
but I can't move my body.
马上来 Jakey
On it, Jakey.
该是大展身手的时候了
It's show time, here we go.
我爱死这事了我们就像是蝙蝠侠和他的管家Alfred
I love this, we're like Batman and Alfred.
你宁愿当Alfred也不愿当Robin
You'd rather be Alfred than Robin?
管家能进入蝙蝠洞此外他还能够
He has access to the batcave, plus, he gets to drive
开车送蝙蝠侠所有的女友回家还负责饭菜
all of Batman's girlfriends home and dish.
当然喽
Doy.
嗨你好吗警长夫人
Oh, hey! How are you Mrs. Sarge?
你看起来一如既往
You look normal.
嗨 Jake Charles
Hi, Jake. Charles.
呃稍等甜心
Uh, hold on, honey.
我得先看看我的邮箱然后就可以走了
I gotta check my emails and then I'll be ready to go.
好了都搞定了
Okay, all set.
太好了玩得开心点
All right, have fun.
没错
Yeah.
Jeffords警长还有Sharon
Sergeant Jeffords. Sharon.
警监咋回来了他啥时候回来的
The Captain's back? When he get back?
快把我转过去
Turn me around!
我方才身体不适
I'm not feeling well.
刚跟盥洗室约了个会
I have an appointment at the restroom
但我还是得献上我的祝福
but I gather congratulations are in order.
祝福什么
For what?
Peralta刚刚给办公室里的每个人
Oh, Peralta sent everyone in the office
都发了封关于给你新宝宝命名的邮件
an email about what to name your new baby.
无论如何我都挺喜欢Todd这个名字的
For what it's worth, I really like the name Todd.
Terrence 他在说什么呢
Terrence, what is he talking about?
是哦 Peralta 他在说什么呢
Yeah, Peralta! What is he talking about?
这个嘛
Hey.
Scully 就是现在
Scully! Now!
哦不他心脏病发了
Oh, no! He's having a heart attack!
那是个活生生的人啊你们这帮冷血动物
This is a man's life, you calloused bastards!
Terry 我很抱歉
Terry, I am so sorry.
你是该觉得抱歉
You should be sorry.
我是该出去吗
Should I get out of here
还是说我淡化成背景就好
or should I just fade into the background
直到你需要我把你推出去
until you need me to wheel you out?
我这就渐隐渐隐
I'll fade. I'll fade.
你答应我你不会告诉任何人的
You promised you wouldn't tell anyone.
我知道但这警局里的所有人都是神探的话
I know, but I can't help it if everyone in this precinct
我也没办法啊
is a brilliant Detective.
但你发了群邮件
You emailed them all!
还是用你的邮箱
With your email!
发到了他们的邮箱
To their emails!
是的没错那是帮助他们破解谜题的关键事实
Okay, yes, that was one fact that may have helped them crack the case,
但Boyle当时已经快发现了
but Boyle was closing in.
其实还差得远呢
I was actually way off.
我的一切理论都只和保龄球有关
All my theories were bowling alley related.
再次渐隐淡出
Fading, fading again.
听着我知道我搞砸了
Look, I know I messed up.
但那真是个无心之过
But it was an honest mistake.
我发誓我是很认真的对待这事的
I promise you, I was taking it seriously.
你给所有人发的那封邮件里讲了什么
What was the email you sent everyone about?
说你该给你的孩子起名叫飓风
How you should name your kid hurricane.
推他出去 Charles
Wheel him out, Charles.
等下
Wait.
这是说我不能做教父了吗
Does this mean I can't be the godfather?
我说了推他出去
I said wheel him out.
你可以做我的教父啊 Jake
You can be my godfather, Jake.
可你比我老啊
You're older than me!
警监你感觉怎么样
Captain? How are you feeling?
今天好多了
Better today.
我今早还试着吃了点原味吐司呢
I even managed to eat some plain toast this morning.
机智
Smart.
吃点清淡的
Something bland.
那是我最爱的早餐
That's my favorite breakfast.
是哦
Right.
警监我很抱歉
Sir, I'm sorry.
我想要当个好点的搭档
I wanted to be a great partner.
另一个Martin Ormankupp
A Martin Ormankupp.
但我却成了让你腹泻的搭档
But instead, I was the partner who made you sick.
我能跟你说点关于Martin的事吗
Can I tell you something about Martin Ormankupp?
我们开始搭档的第二天
On our second day as partners,
他就被一匹警马爆了裆
Martin Ormankupp was kicked in the crotch by a police horse.
万万没想到你要说这个
Not what I was expecting you to say.
在我们合办的所有案子当中那一刻是
Of all the cases that we worked, that moment was the one
最让我们紧密相连的
that bonded us the most.
因为那成了我们之间的笑料
Because that's what we laughed about.
在他历经了手术和数月的复健之后
After his surgery and months long rehab.
对Martin和他夫人Heather来说
It was a terrible ordeal for both Martin
都是段惨痛的时光
and Heather Ormankupp.
所以你觉得我们能把我给你下毒这事当做笑料
Mm. So you think we can laugh about me poisoning you?
没错
Yes, I do.
在未来某天
Someday.
没准就是在吃完路边摊之后
Perhaps over street meat.
警监你刚刚是笑了吗
Sir, did you just laugh?
那是放声大笑
Uproariously.
我的天哪
Oh, my God.
这真的发生了
It's happening.
遵命
Yup.
警长给
Here, sarge.
这是我余下的欠款
It's the rest of the money I owe you.
1237元
1,237 bucks.
我还以为你已经榨干了你的银行账户了呢
I thought you already drained your bank account.
我把车卖♥♥了
I sold my car.
没关系的
It's not a big deal.
噢我的天啊这事关系大了去了
Oh, my God! This is such a huge deal!
我不该泄露你的秘密
I can't un-tell your secret.
我能做的就是确保接下来的四个星期里
The best I can do is make sure no one talks about it
没人谈论这事外加还上你的钱就这样
for the next four weeks and pay back your money, so.
Jake 等一下
Jake, hold up.
咋啦
Yeah?
我在想你是否还愿意当教父
I was wondering if you still wanted to be the godfather.
等会儿你说真的
Wait, seriously?
没错当然
Yes! Of course!
那真是太棒了
That would be amazing.
谢谢你
Thank you.
我一定会做一个超棒的教父
I'm gonna be such a good godfather.
你会看到我像这样
You'll see. I'm gonna be like...
"你这是怎么搞的你得做个男子汉"
"What's the matter with you? Be a man!"
经典黑帮电影<教父>中的台词
你懂我意思吧
You know?
显然我不会朝着宝宝大吼大叫的
You know, obviously I wouldn't scream that at the baby.