神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E07

Part 3 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:03 p.m.

最好是这样
You better hope that's true.
很好他终于走了
Good, he's gone.
现在干点正经事吧
Now, let's get serious and focus up.
我只是想蹦到打印机旁边
Just trying to get to the printer.
嘿大家伙
Hey, hey, hey, people.
麻烦各位过来一下
How about everyone come on, bring it in here, gather around?
大家感觉怎么样
So how we all holding up?
不太好我们可是在感恩节被困在这儿
Not good. We're trapped on Thanksgiving.
到底怎么回事
What's going on, man?
很好首先
Okay, great, first off,
感恩节快乐
happy Thanksgiving, everyone.
为火鸡欢呼吧
Shout-out to turkey.
喔呼
Whoo-whoo!
谢谢好了是这么回事
Thank you. All right, so here's the deal.
我们还在等初步检测结果
We are still awaiting the initial test results,
希望最终能知道
but hopefully, we'll hear soon
那包东西是无害的我们就能马上回家了
that it's all harmless and we can all go home soon.
你干得很
You're doing a great...
你在干嘛
What are you doing?
我在对你耳语呀二把手都这么干
I'm whispering in your ear. It's what a number two does.
靠太近了吧
It was way too close.
就小点声说不行吗
Can you say it quietly to me, please?
事情进行得很顺利
This is going really well.
好了
Okay.
总之我觉得这段时间内
At any rate, I figured we could pass the time
我们可以找点好玩的事也许来个电影之夜
and do something fun, maybe a movie night.
第一选择是 Diane Keaton经典电影
Our options are a bootleg copy of the Diane Keaton classic,
Diane Keaton 美国女演员代表作<教父> <呆头鹅>
<爱是妥协>的盗版碟
something's gotta give.
电影不错
Movie's hilarious.
噢很出乎意料的观点
Okay, surprising opinion.
我们待会再议
We'll talk about that later.
第二选择是看Amy Santiago警探
And our second option is surveillance footage of
言辞正经地去买♥♥毒品的录像带
Detective Amy Santiago soliciting drugs using perfect grammar.
礼貌地问"能给我一些可♥卡♥因♥吗"不会很奇怪吧
It's not that weird to say, "May I have some cocaine?"
会 - 这些选项无聊死了
It is. - Those options suck.
好吧那我们要不在这儿举办场达人秀呗
Fair enough, why don't we have a talent show then?
谁有才艺可以表演
Who has a special talent?
我刚学了的舞
Oh, I just learned the single ladies dance.
嘿太好了
Hey! Yes!
大家看得很开心啊
People love it.
看呀两个妓♥女♥也加入了
Look at that, two painted ladies just joined in.
你不得不承认
You got to admit,
Boyle很懂怎么扭动他的盆骨部位
Boyle really knows how to move his pelvis.
不敢相信这是我有生之年能看到的
I can't believe this is one of the last things
最后一个场面
I'm ever gonna see.
事实上中了炭疽你在最后看到的
Actually, with Anthrax, the last things you'll see
将会是医生血医生脓痂没了
will be doctor, blood, doctor, pus, scab, nothing.
你为什么要这样说
Why are you saying that?
因为你的反应太夸张了
'Cause you're being melodramatic,
所以我在嘲笑你 - 好吧
so I'm making fun of you. - Fine.
我要把你从我的遗嘱里去掉
I'm writing you out of my will.
跟两只"美邹豹"做♥爱♥的雕像说拜拜吧
Say good-bye to my sculpture of two "Jag-u-ars" Making love.
呼就是因为这个我才当警♥察♥的
Whoo! This is why I became a cop.
真的吗 - 大家可喜欢达人秀了
Really? - People love the talent show.
律师男在表演单口相声
Lawyer guy's doing stand-up.
他确实是个好苗子 - 喔
He's got really good material. - Oh.
世界上有两个职位的人可以完全控制
There are two jobs where you have total control
付钱给他们的人国家总统
over the people that pay you: President of a country
和清洁女工
and cleaning lady.
不敢相信你竟然给了一群暴民一个扩音器
I can't believe you gave the mob a megaphone.
好吧首先我们没有话筒可提供
Okay, first of all, we didn't have a mic,
其次他们不是暴民
and second, it's not a mob.
而是一个由怪咖们组成的欢乐群体
It's a happy group of unlikely friends.
可能没你说的那么欢乐
Maybe not so happy.
他们开始喊饿了
People are starting to get hungry.
好的没问题
Oh. Okay, not a problem.
就给他们弄点吃的来吧
Let's get them some food.
瞧从两个和我们一起被困在此的
Voila, a Thanksgiving feast
外卖♥♥小哥那儿得来的感恩节大餐
from the two delivery guys who are trapped in here with us,
是由我付的Boyle的钱
and paid for by me with Boyle's money.
先记在账上
Put it on the tab.
那我呢
What about me?
呃我应该可以找个朋友
Uh, I guess I could have a friend
从街上给你扔上来点椒盐卷饼吧
throw some pretzels up to you from the street?
也会有汽水吗
And soda too?
好吧我会找个人冲你
Fine, I'll have someone blindly throw
瞎扔冰凉铁皮听装汽水的
ice-cold metal cans of soda at you.
Jake 我知道你觉得事情进展的很好
Jake, I know you think this is going well,
但你不能再这样走一步看一步了
but you can't keep putting out fires as they come up.
你得立些规矩
You need to set down some rules.
没事的大家都很开心
It's fine. Everyone is happy.
现在我们只要坐等警报解除就好了
Now we just coast to the all-clear.
这里冷死了我们要暖气
We're freezing in here! We want heat!
我们要暖气
We want heat!
我们要暖气
We want heat!
我们要暖气我们要暖气
We want heat! We want heat!
怎么
What?
我很高兴我给了他们扩音器
I'm glad I gave them the megaphone.
让我更容易倾听群众的心声了
It helps me hear their concerns.
现在不好意思
Now, if you'll excuse me,
我要去找几袋暖气来
I need to go find a couple bags... of heat.
Charles和我几年前以售卖♥♥山寨
Charles and I arrest the guy a couple of years ago
名牌大衣的罪名逮捕了一个人
that was selling knock-off designer coats.
我们只需要找到装衣服的箱子
We just gotta find the box they're in,
大家就会温暖又开心了
and everyone will be warm and happy.
你不能让他们这样联合起来欺负你
You can't let them gang up on you.
你得男人一点
You need to man up.
男人一点性别歧视
Man up? Sexist.
很抱歉但是我不靠性别评判人长官
I'm sorry, but I don't see gender, sir.
告诉他们关于粉末的真♥相♥
Tell them the truth about the powder,
告诉他们他们需要在这儿呆上一会儿
tell them that they're gonna be here awhile,
然后告诉他们他们可能会
and tell them that they might have to be
有一点不适
a little uncomfortable.
因为我看起来太帅而引起的不适吗
Uncomfortable because of how amazing I look in this?
Zeke我很抱歉但警监觉得
Zeke, I'm sorry, but Captain thinks
我们得再多用一会儿你的房♥间
we're gonna have to use your room for a little longer.
没问题
No problem.
真的吗 - 是啊我理解你
Really?- Yeah, I feel you.
我也有一个那么混♥蛋♥的上司
I got a boss that's a jerk like that too.
是啊
Right.
警监最讨厌了
The Captain's the worst.
有时候我叫他呆瓜Holt
Sometimes, I call him Holt the dolt.
这叫法不错
That's cold.
继续坚持兄弟
Stay tough, brother.
兄弟
Brother?
兄弟我会的兄弟
Brother. I will, brother.
好的
All right.
等下再聊兄弟
Talk to you later, brother.
回见兄弟
See you, brother.
拜兄弟
Bye, brother.
好了我写好我的遗嘱了
Okay, I have finished my last will and testament.
对于Rosa 我什么都不给
To Rosa, I leave you nothing.
弃权
Pass.
你本来就没得到东西所以不能说弃权
You can't pass on me leaving you nothing.
我刚就这么说了
Just did.
这都最后一天了别这样 Rosa
Not today, Rosa.
对Charles 我给你留下了关于我柔软的身段的记忆
To Charles, I leave you the memories of my supple form.
我让所有人记住了我丢人的床史
I'm reminding everyone of my embarrassing sexual past
因为我希望这种善意之举
'cause I'm hoping it's the act of charity
能够让我上天堂