神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E16

Part 4 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:05 p.m.

脚踩燕麦粥
stepping on some oatmeal.
展现真实自我
Just doing me.
难以置信在所有人中你是今天最大的麻烦 Jeffords
I can't believe that you, of all people, are my biggest problem today, Jeffords.
Kevin 警监在家不 - 不在
Kevin, is the captain home? - No.
太好了我知道怎么回事了
Good, I figured out what happened to him.
他被打劫了 - 啥
He was mugged. - What?
他告诉你的
He told you this?
不是是我运用了办案技能
No, I used my detective skills
和精确的Holt模仿技能发现的
as well as my spot-on Holt impression to figure it out.
我重走了他的上班路找出了监视录像
I retraced his steps and found security footage.
他离开击剑馆后三个鬼鬼祟祟的人跟着他进了小巷
After he left fencing, three shady guys followed him into an alley.
其中一个人还有刀
One of them had a knife.
所以他才这么不高兴
That's why he's been in such a bad mood.
他是个警监却被打劫了
He's a police captain that got mugged.
他觉得很丢脸
He's embarrassed.
天哪
Oh, my goodness.
Peralta - 他回来了
Peralta. - There he is.
你在我家干啥
What are you doing in my house?
Raymond 你被打劫了 - 啥
Raymond, you were mugged? - What?
你跟他说啥了
What did you say to him?
警监没事的
Captain, it's okay.
没什么丢脸的
There's nothing to be embarrassed about.
我没觉得丢脸我也没被打劫
I'm not embarrassed, and I wasn't mugged.
有三个人想打劫我但是我把他们撂倒了
Three men tried to mug me, but I fought them off,
还伤了两个
injuring two of them.
等等这么说你英勇地击退了三个家伙
Wait, so you heroically fought off three guys,
所以你不高兴
and that put you in a bad mood?
换做是我我绝对要为自己写歌♥了
If I did that, I would literally write a song about myself.
像这样
It would be like...
*Jake是个大英雄腹肌壮壮哒*
*Jake the hero. Abs of steel.*
*啦啦啦啦*
*Sha-la, la-la*
你为什么不告诉我
Why would you keep this from me,
为什么骗我说你去击剑俱乐部了
and why would you lie about going to fencing?
因为他去不了他受伤了
Because he couldn't go, because he's injured.
我没受伤就是被轻轻捅了一刀
I wasn't injured. I was lightly stabbed.
什么你被捅了
I'm sorry. You were stabbed?
轻轻地被捅了我不想吓到你
Lightly stabbed. I didn't want to frighten you.
你是我丈夫
You are my husband.
我希望你对我毫无隐瞒
I want you to tell me everything,
特别是那些会吓到我的事情
especially things that might frighten me.
你怎么能不明白呢
How can you not know that?
Raymond 你真太难以置信了
Raymond, you are unbelievable.
警监你看着好高大
Hey, Captain, you look so tall.
你的所作所为太不专业了
What you have done is beyond unprofessional.
你怎么可以四处插手私人生活
You cannot muck around in people's private lives.
快滚
Get out of my house.
滚去你的车里吗我还是走吧
But get into your car? I'll go.
长官 - 警探
Sir. - Detective.
你昨晚工作如何
So how was your night? Of work.
我不会打探你的私人生活的
I'm not asking about your personal life.
我不关心那些的
I don't care about you personally.
我是说我是中立的我是说你谁啊
I mean, I'm neutral. I mean, who are you?
胡扯不如闭嘴
Floundering is worse than silence.
好的好好好好
Oh, cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool.
好好绝对的绝对的绝对的
Cool, cool, no doubt. No doubt, no doubt.
这电梯真是慢对不
Man, this elevator's slow, huh?
因为你没按楼层按钮
That's because you haven't pressed the button.
所以说你能做警监
That's why you're the captain.
这么聪明
So smart.
我还是闭嘴吧
I'm gonna just... zip.
不再叽叽喳喳的
No more talk-y. Hmm.
呃一大♥波♥冷空气迎面而来
Eek, blast of cold air coming out of that box.
Amy性♥爱♥录像的标题
Name of Amy's sex tape.
嘿不是吧这样没意思了
Hey, man, come on. Not cool.
我现在痛苦不堪就让我开个玩笑嘛
I'm going through something. Just let me have this one.
Jake 很抱歉你浪费了你的"大号♥"
I'm sorry you wasted your chit, Jake.
没事
It's all right.
我想向Holt道歉但是这算是私事
I want to apologize to Hol but it seems personal,
我不允许跟他聊私事的
and I'm not supposed to talk to him about personal stuff.
我觉得你得想个谈公事的方法弥补他
Oh, boo, I guess you need to think of some professional way to make it up to him.
等一下 Gina 就这么办
Wait a minute. Gina, that's it.
我刚灵光一现
I just had an idea.
Peralta 你是天才
Peralta, you're a genius.
这是模仿谁斯嘉丽
Who was that, ScarJo?
是Holt 我认为你知道的
It was Holt, and I think you know that.
我觉得是斯嘉丽
I thought it was ScarJo.
真不敢相信那个混♥蛋♥打败了我
I can't believe that bastard beat me.
行了他都死了
Whoa, he's dead.
哪点能看出他是赢家啊
It's kind of hard to see how he's the winner in this.
他弄得我跟个傻瓜似的
He made me look like an idiot.
不我和Amy才是傻瓜
No, Amy and I were the idiots,
我们让那个老滑头耍了
because we let that ancient windbag fool us.
是他抢的银行
He robbed the banks.
他给钱让我去买♥♥姜汁汽水
He gave me money for the ginger ale.
因为你坚持说他有罪
After you insisted he was guilty,
我就去查了一下他给的钱
I went back and checked his dollar.
序列号♥和被盗的钱是一致的
Serial numbers match the stolen bills.
你抓的人是对的
You brought in the right guy.
你是个好警♥察♥ Boyle
You're a damn good cop, Boyle.
我知道就是没人听
I know. No one listens.
不过你朝他的脸泼水的时候不怎么样
Except when you threw water in his dead face.
真是残忍♥
That was rough.
我以为他装的呢
I thought he was faking it.
我想把他的谎言都泼出来
I wanted to splash the lies out of him.
好了警探有什么事
All right, Detective, what's this all about?
你有70秒 - 为什么是70
You have 70 seconds. - Why 70?
你真想浪费时间听我解释计算方法吗
Do you really want to waste your time while I explain my algorithm?
有道理我从你差点被劫的监视录像中截了图
Right, all right, so I pulled a still from the security footage of your attempted mugging
送去了附近的片区
and sent it to the nearby precincts.
识别了其中一个暴徒的身份他住这儿
We ID'd one of the mopes, and that's his apartment.
我想你应该想亲自动手吧
I thought maybe you would want to do the honors.
你觉得这能补救你的所作所为
And you think this will make everything you did better?
没准呢这是Gina的主意所以
Well, maybe. It was Gina's idea, so...
确实可以 - Gina和这事没关系
It will. - Gina had nothing to do with it.
你想知道我为什么一周都很生气吗
You want to know why I was so angry all week?
那些人袭击我的时候我的反应像个20岁的毛头小子
When those men came at me, I acted like I was a 20-year-old.
我愚蠢地冒险了还被捅了
I took a stupid risk, and I got myself stabbed.
我肉体疼痛
I was in pain
心灵还因为对所爱的人撒谎而恐惧不安
and frustrated about lying to the man I love.
你是说Kevin - 是的
Kevin. - Yes.
当然是Kevin - 当然
Obviously Kevin. - Obviously.
我想说的是你一直是对的
What I'm trying to say is, you were right all along.
我不是生你的气
I wasn't mad at you.
我是生自己的气还发在队员身上
I was mad at myself, and I took it out on the squad.
Peralta 你是天才
Peralta, you're a genius.
天呐你真说了这句话
Oh, my God. You said it.
我听见你在洗手间练习说这个了
I heard you practicing in the men's room.
对啊这才说得通
Yeah, that makes more sense.
大家注意了简单说一下
Attention, squad, quick announcement.
加班恢复了
Overtime is reinstated,
你们每人可以放两张私人照片
and you are each allowed two personal photographs,
两件装饰品三个组合摆设
two trinkets, and three assorted knickknacks.
反正就紧随Jeffords警长的领导
You know what? Just follow Sergeant Jeffords' lead.
他对这里该如何高效运作了如指掌
He always knows how to keep this place running smoothly.
太好了所以橡皮筋球可以回来了
Nice, so rubber band balls are back.
不行那样对橡皮筋不好
Oh, no, it's bad for the bands.
Kevin 我去拿一下外套
Ah, Kevin. Let me just get my coat.
你好 Peralta Gina
Hello, Peralta. Gina.
感谢亲爱的舞蹈之神
Oh, sweet lords of dance, thank you.
我们又回到被叫名字的行列了
We're back on a first-name basis.