神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E11

Part 4 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:04 p.m.

What is going on with you two?
你闹什么呢啊 - 亲爱的
What's going on with you? - Love?
够了
That's it.
是时候来个急停会谈了
Time for an emergency stop and talk.
好那成
Okay, fine.
你想知道怎么回事吗
You want to know what's going on?
我们读了你的书
We read your book.
我告诉你我不是什么窝囊废
And you should know I'm not a pushover.
我也不是冷血婊
And I'm not a stone-cold bitch.
我是自然与美丽的化身
I'm a natural, beautiful presence.
好了很抱歉那些角色长得像你们
Okay, I'm sorry these characters look like you,
但相似的地方仅此而已
but that's where the resemblance stops.
的确六月虫对小鸭嘴兽挑三拣四
Sure, june bug is a meanie to the platy-pups,
但她对小袜仔却非常友好
but she's a sweetheart to the socktopus.
而且尽管蟋蟀的确是窝囊废
And cricket is a pushover
她让任何人向神奇麋鹿许愿
when it comes to magic moose wishes,
但在海豚战争里她却绝不服软
but she's very brave in the dolphin wars.
我觉得这些话的意思就是
I guess what I'm saying is,
这些故事荒谬至极
these stories are nonsense.
我爱你们
I love you guys,
但如果你们这么爱给我的书添油加醋
but if you're bringing something more to my book,
那你们就自己生闷气吧
that's on you.
如果你没把电梯停下来
If you hadn't stopped the elevator,
那你就可以在演讲完后潇洒走人了
you could have walked off after your great speech.
现在我们只好沉浸在这尴尬中
Now we all got to sit in it.
Marcus 你要走了吗
Marcus, you leaving?
来吧和我们吃顿早饭
Come, have breakfast with us.
你们起得好早啊
You're up early.
好吧
Okay.
还有 Diaz警探也在这里
And Detective Diaz is here as well.
嗨
Hey.
你好 Kevin
Hello, Kevin.
Rosa Marcus
Rosa. Marcus.
Kevin Ray叔叔
Kevin. Uncle Ray.
Marcus 还有Cheddar
Marcus. And cheddar.
Cheddar也在这里
Cheddar is also here.
呃你要不要来和我们一起吃饭
Uh, would you care to join us?
没问题
Sure.
我们坐下来吧
Shall we sit?
我不想坐下
I don't think... Sit.
好那就别强迫自己待在这里了 Rosa
Good, then feel no obligation to stay, Rosa.
Diaz警探
Detective Diaz.
Rosa Diaz警探闯入了我的私人早餐场所
Detective Rosa Diaz is in my breakfast nook.
那么谁想吃点法式吐司吗
So who would like french toast?
我可以在上面放个培根小笑脸
I can put a bacon smile on it.
我在这里呆着太尴尬了
My being here is weird.
这种想法真是太糟糕了
This was a bad idea.
我们还是不要在一起了
We shouldn't see each other again.
那么Rosa Diaz警探已经走了
Well, Detective Rosa Diaz has left.
哼
Hmm.
这屋子里剩下的唯一的食物
The only food left in the whole room
就是你那条白♥痴♥鲱鱼
is your stupid herring.
喔所以我们又开始说话了吗
Oh, so we're talking now?
呵估计是吧
Well, I guess so,
因为这话我说出口了也让你听到了
since words came out of my mouth and you heard them.
你这是在诡辩 "禁止诡辩"
That's glib. No being glib.
清单上写得一清二楚
It's on the list.
我受够这清单了
I'm so sick of the list.
我连"诡辩"是什么意思都不知道
I don't even know what "Glib" Means.
那你就问问自己
Ask yourself this.
"这话是加菲猫会说的吗"
Is it something you can hear Garfield saying?
如果是那这就是诡辩
If so, it's glib.
怎么你是想让我当加菲猫的主人乔恩·艾伯特吗
So what, you want me to just be Garfield's owner, Jon Arbuckle?
说话的时候过过脑子
Think about what you're saying.
他可是个温和懦弱的人
He's spineless and bland.
而且我告诉你我为人"加菲猫似的" 不拘小节
And by the way, me keeping things light and being "Garfeldian"
就是我们不吵架的唯一原因
Is the only reason we don't fight.
大错特错哟孩儿
Wrong, baby.
我们不吵架的唯一原因
The only reason we don't fight
就是我一直容忍♥着你烦人的行为
is because I never say anything when you annoy me,
也就是长久以来孩儿
which is constantly, baby.
我就任由你随便捣乱
I just let it roll off.
我充耳不闻哟孩儿
I'm a duck's back, baby.
别再说"孩儿"了
Stop saying "Baby."
Charles Boyle生气的时候就爱叫别人"孩儿"
Charles Boyle calls people "Baby" when he gets angry.
这才是我
That's who I am.
有了这些的我才是真正的我
And all this is who I am.
如果你讨厌这些事情
And if you don't like this stuff,
那我们就不要再做朋友了
then we shouldn't be friends.
好呀那我也告诉你
Great. 'Cause guess what?
我们不再是朋友了
We're not friends.
那当然没问题孩儿
That's fine with me, baby.
不好
Uh-oh.
这下好了调查暴露了
Well, the operation is blown.
*今晚带我去监视* - 我恨死这首歌♥了
*Stake me out tonight* - Oh, I hate this song.
我就喜欢 - *抓到坏人之前我不会放你走*
I stand by it. - *I don't want to let you go till we catch this guy*
好了我要把这些东西还回去
Well, I'm gonna check this stuff back in.
好啊去吧
Great. Do it.
好
Okay.
然后我们就完事了
Then we're done.
对彻底完事了
Yeah, then we're done.
哟哟哟
Well, well, well.
Boyle不去 Hitchcock不来嘛
Looks like Boyle's out and Hitchcock's in.
你今晚想干啥呀
What do you want to do tonight?
要去脱衣舞夜♥总♥会♥耍耍吗
Go to a strip club?
要和我老婆吃顿饭吗
Have dinner with my wife?
这些选项是互相独♥立♥的吗
Are those separate options,
还是说她就住在夜♥总♥会♥里
or does she live at the strip club?
想知道答案就来试试看
You want to know, you got to go.
好吧
Okay.
Peralta 由于你的篮球事故
Peralta, thanks to your basketball mishap,
窝点已经被弃用了
the drop site has been abandoned,
而且Alexei Bisko已经销声匿迹
and Alexei Bisko's gone to ground.
都说了八天的监视实在是太久了
We told you eight days was too long for a stakeout.
恕我失礼长官那并不是时间长短的问题
With all due respect, sir, it wasn't the amount of time.
而是共事人选的问题
It's who I was stuck there with.
和Scully在一起我就能轻易完成任务
I could easily have done it with Scully.
真的吗
Really?
你会往他的背上抹油吗
You would've applied that cream to his back?
不我会把那东西抹在地板上
No, I would've put it on the floor
让Scully在上面慢慢滚
and let him roll around in it.
我身经百战了好吗
This isn't my first rodeo.
你必须找到Bisko
You need to find Bisko.
你可以从挨家挨户排查开始
You can start by doing door duty,
看看有没有人知道他的下落
see if anyone knows where he is.
带上Boyle
Take Boyle.
长官我申请更换搭档
Sir, I'd like to request a new partner.
我没法和Charles一起工作
I can't work with Charles.
我们再也不是朋友了
We're not friends anymore.
"朋友"
"Friends?"
我不在乎你们是不是朋友
I don't care if you're friends.
这不是欢乐聚会
This is not a playdate.
这是你的上司在吩咐你去工作
This is your commanding officer ordering you to do your job.
好吧但我希望你能清楚
Fine, but I hope you can live with the fact
你在强迫不共戴天的人们去相处
that you're forcing people to spend time together who would rather not.
我并不介意的
I'm fine with that.
警长我要和你谈谈这本儿童书
Sarge, I need to talk to you about the kid's book.
真的吗
Seriously?
我正在包装它不能分神
I'm wrapping it right now, and I need to focus.
听着我知道故事很荒谬
Look, I know the story is nonsense
而我也不是啥穿套装盔甲的树林小仙女