神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S01E01

Part 1 Oct. 1, 2020, 12:34 p.m.

This job is eating me alive.
我要被这工作整死了
I can't breathe anymore.
我已经无法呼吸了
I spent all these years trying to be the good guy,
这些年来我努力做一个好人
the man in the white hat.
一个有道德有素养的好人
I'm not becoming like them.
我并不是要变得像他们
I am them.
我就是他们中的一员
Hey! What are you doing, weirdo?
怪胎你在干嘛
I'm doing the best speech from Donnie Brasco.
我在模仿<忠奸人>里最有名的一段演说
Or actually,
其实吧
ten of me are doing the best speech from Donnie Brasco.
是十个我在模仿<忠奸人>里的那段演说
What's up?
怎么着
Get it together, man. Okay?
正经点好吗
So the store was hit about two hours ago.
大概两小时前商店遇劫
They took mostly tablets, laptops, and cameras.
几乎所有平板电脑手提和照相机都遭劫
Sorry.
不好意思
I'd like a list of all your employees,
请给我一份
whoever had access to the store.
有商店钥匙的员工名单
I'd also like to apologize for my partner.
我还要替我的搭档给您道个歉
His parents didn't give him enough attention.
他父母以前没带他看病
Uh, Detective...
警探
I already solved the case.
我已经破案了
We're looking for three white males,
嫌疑犯是三名男性白人
one of whom has sleeve tats on both arms.
其中有个人两只手臂都有纹身
And how do you know that?
你又是怎么知道的
I had an informant on the inside.
我在内部有线人
He's been here for years.
他在这儿好几年了
Watching, learning. Waiting.
观察学习等待
His code name?
他的代号♥是
Fuzzy Cuddle bear.
毛绒抱抱熊
He's a nanny cam.
针孔摄像头
You got lucky.
你走狗屎运
No, I got here five minutes before you
我就是比你先到了五分钟
and figured that in this gigantic electronics store,
我想着这么大一个卖♥♥电子设备的商店
there had to be at least one working camera.
至少有一个摄像头在运作吧
Oh! Hi, bad guys!
坏人们你们好啊
You did it, fuzzy. You busted 'em.
绒绒你做到了你抓到他们了
It's time to come home.
可以回家了
I'm not sure if I can.
我可不确定
I've been undercover so long, I've forgotten who I am.
我做了太久的卧底我已经忘了我是谁
I have seen terrible things.
我目睹过许多惨状
I haven't known the touch of a woman in many moons.
我已经太久没有碰过女人了
All right.
够了
Detective Santiago!
Santiago警探
Don't walk away from me!
不要离开我
Yes, I did crack the case.
是的是我破的案
So, Santiago, would you do the honors?
Santiago 您请吧
I hate this!
真烦
I hate this.
真烦
And you're just gonna add one.
加一就好了
I'm winning.
我要赢了
It's a good feeling.
感觉真好
It's a good feeling. Yeah.
真的好
Enjoy it while it lasts.
抓紧时间好好享受吧
I will!
我会的
JP, update on the Morgenthau murder?
JP 汇报一下Morgenthau凶杀案
Yeah! Good news for all you murder fans.
你们这些喜欢凶杀案的好消息来咯
Earlier this morning...
今早早些时候
Someone decided to shoot and kill
有人决心枪杀
luxury food importer Henry Morgenthau.
食物进口商大亨Henry Morgenthau
Body was found by the cleaning lady,
清洁工发现的尸体
during her interview, I deduced, using expert Detective work,
录她口供的时候我运用我大侦探的聪明才智推断出
that she had something super gross on her chin.
她的下巴上有个特别恶心的东西
I think it was flan.
我觉得是果馅饼
Charles thinks it was flan.
Charles觉得是果馅饼
I think it was butterscotch pudding.
我觉得是奶油糖果布丁
Maybe it was just old person gunk.
也许就是老年人黏物
You know how old people always have that gunk on them.
老年人身上总是有黏黏的东西
Oldie gunk. Could be, yeah.
老年人粘稠物有可能
Anyone else? How about we focus on the murder
还有呢别说老年人黏物了
and not the old person gunk?
继续来讲案件吧
Crime techs are at the scene now.
技术人员在现场了
We're heading back when they're done.
等他们弄完我们就过去
Okay, I want you on this.
大家都对这个案子上点心
It's gonna be priority one for the new C.O.
这是会是新来警监想要先破的案子
Wait, tell us about the new Captain.
等下跟我们说说这个新警监呗
Captain Holt will be here soon.
Holt警监等下就过来了
He'll wanna introduce himself. Dismissed.
他会做自我介绍的散会
Hey, Gina.
Gina
You know any scalpers?
你有没有认识的黄牛啊
I wanna ask Rosa to go to the Rihanna concert with me,
我想邀请Rosa和我一起看Rihanna的演唱会
but it's sold out.
但是票都卖♥♥完了
Okay, two points to make here.
我要提醒你两点
First, Rihanna...
第一点 Rihanna
You...
你
And then Rihanna.
Rihanna
Yeah. What's your second point?
我知道第二点呢
She's got a type.
她有喜欢的类型
Which is really anyone but you.
除你之外的任何人
Yeah, that was my ex-wife's type too.
这也是我前妻喜欢的类型呢
Look, a Rihanna concert's a pretty big swing, man.
Rihanna演唱会可说不准啊
I don't know. She's into watching old movies.
我也不知道她喜欢看老电影
Cool. Where would I find a place that shows old movies?
这个好啊有什么地方会放老电影啊
Oh, yeah, just go on the Internet
你就上网然后搜索
and search for the phrase "I want to buy two movie tickets
"来两张和一个不喜欢我的女孩
for a girl who doesn't like me."
一起看场电影的票子"
Great. Thank you. Good.
太好了谢谢不客气
Hey, you heard anything about the new Captain?
你有没有新警监的消息
Uh, no, and I don't care.
没有我也不在意
I just wish Captain McGintley never left, he was the best.
McGintley警监没有走就好了他是最好的
He was terrible.
他很烂
You just liked him 'cause he let you do
你就是因为他让你随心所欲
anything you wanted.
所以才喜欢他
On your marks, get set...
各就各位预备
Go.
出发
What the hell's going on around here?
你们在干嘛
Fire extinguisher roller chair derby?
灭火器轮椅速度赛
Okay.
好吧
And go!
出发
What's your point?
你想说明什么
If I'm ever gonna make Captain, I need a good mentor.
如果以后我想当上警监我需要有个导师
I need my rabbi.
我需要我的师♥父♥
Sorry, dude...
抱歉了妹子
But this new guy's gonna be another washed-up pencil pusher
新来的这个肯定又是一个死板的办事员
who's only concerned with...
只知道
Following every rule
跟着巡逻指南走
in the patrol guide.
循规蹈矩
Meep morp zeep. Robot Captain Engage.
哔哔哔机器人警监来咯
Is that what you think? Hehey!
你这么想的吗嘿嘿
New Captain alert.
新警监警报
You must be the new C.O.
你一定是新警监了
I'm Detective Jake Peralta. Great to meet you.
我是Jake Peralta警探很高兴见到你
Now don't let me interrupt.
别因为我来了
You were describing what kind of person I'm gonna be.
就不描述我是啥样的了
I'd like you to finish.
你继续
That's not necessary.
没必要吧
Or I could recap very quickly, sure.
那我再快速来一遍
Um, let's see.
我想想
I think I said some joke
我好像说了点
about being a washed-up pencil pusher.
死板办事员的笑话
Now do the robot voice. Which...
继续模仿机器人说话什么