神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E12

Part 1 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:04 p.m.

有趣
Interesting.
非常非常有趣
Very, very interesting.
各位
Guys.
警监没穿裤子
Captain Holt has no pants on.
呃
Um...
什么情况
What?
情况就是他没穿裤子
He has no pants on, is what.
事情是这样的
Here are the facts:
在上午11点55分的时候
at 11:55 a.M.,
警监端着一碗热汤从我们旁边走过
Captain Holt walked past us holding a hot bowl of soup.
在中午12点03分我听到他大喊
at 12:03 P.M., I heard him yell...
哎呀
Ouch!
然后在12点07分
Then at 12:07,
他把Gina叫进了办公室
he called Gina into his office.
她进去的时候手上什么都没拿
She entered, holding nothing.
1分钟过后她拿着一个不透明袋子出来了
One minute later, she left holding an opaque bag.
警监的裤子就在那袋子里
Captain Holt's pants were in that bag.
凉风正在吹抚着他的膝盖
His knees are in the breeze.
他现在只穿着他的小内内
He's in his undies.
这些都是间接证据
That evidence is circumstantial.
噢所以你们是想要眼见为实啰
Oh, so you guys want visual confirmation?
不要 - 不是啊
No. - Not really.
没问题
Done.
嗨警监
Hey, Captain.
我需要你来我座位上签点东西很快的
I just need you to sign something at my desk real quick.
把东西放在沙发上吧
Just leave it on the couch.
散了吧 - 好的
Dismissed. - Okay.
警监你要激动坏了
Sir, you're gonna freak.
马友友(大提琴家)来咱们区了
Yo-Yo Ma is in the precinct,
他还在发签名照
and he's giving out autographs.
马友友正在澳大利亚巡演
Yo-Yo Ma is on tour in Australia right now.
你怎么会知道这个
How would you know that?
警监我被止咳糖噎到了
Sir, I'm choking on a lozenge!
我要挂了
I'm gonna die!
我来救你了 Jake - 不不要
I got you, Jake! - No, no.
停我吞了
Stop. I swallowed it.
我吞下去了没事了
I swallowed it. It's fine.
嘿嘿
Hey, hey.
我给你又做了一碗汤
I made you another bowl of soup
因为看你把上一碗洒了
since you spilled yours earlier,
不过你得过来拿
but you're gonna have to come over here to get it.
好了 Peralta 我不想看到你再浪费时间了
All right, Peralta, I'm sick of you wasting time,
所以没错我洒了点蔬菜汤到裤子上
so, yes, I spilled some minestrone on my pants,
还有我只穿着内♥裤♥
and I'm sitting in my underwear.
满意了吗
Happy?
满意了
Yes.
哎呀
Ah.
警监我需要你签一下
Sir, I need you to sign off on...
看看我们只是三个穿着裤子的人
look at us, just three people with pants on
进行着正常的对话
having a normal conversation.
没错没什么事情发生
Yep. No story here.
大家好
Hello, everybody.
我手上拿着的是去往
In my hands, I hold the driving directions
今年的全警探度假的驾驶指南
to this year's detectives-only getaway.
取个酷点的名字 Jake
Give it a cool name, Jake.
好全警探度假
All right, detectives-only getaway...
全犬犬假
d-o-g, dog, dog party...
犬假2015
Dog Party '15.
汪汪汪
Woof, woof, woof!
大家欢呼感谢Charles Boyle
Big shout-out to Charles Boyle
今年在他的海滩别♥墅♥招待我们
for hosting us at his beach house this year.
耶
Yeah.
你们其实应该感谢我的前妻
You should really thank my ex-wife.
我们离婚时分了这房♥子
We split it in the divorce.
从12月到2月归我用
I get it for December through February.
冬天的海滩别♥墅♥ 汪汪汪
Winter B-house! Woof, woof, woof!
感觉这台词不会火
Yeah, that's not really catching on.
唉 - 像往常一样没有配偶
Aw. - As always, there will be no spouses,
没有老板没有工作
no bosses, no work...
没有固定的就寝时间
No bedtimes,
但也不能太晚
within reason.
好了 Santiago已经嗨起来了
All right, Santiago's feeling rowdy.
还有谁感受到了这火热的气氛
Who else is feeling it?
我等不及了
I can't wait.
这个周末我就是假期Terry
This weekend, I am Vacation Terry.
没有孩子没有责任
No kids, no responsibilities.
我只是飘浮在湛蓝天空中的一只气球
I'm just a balloon floating in the great blue sky,
没有束缚
and I am untethered.
我想问一下
And just to clarify,
假期Terry的老婆有多不束缚他
how untethered is Vacation Terry from his wife?
有很多束缚
Very tethered.
好了还有人有问题吗
All right, anyone else have questions?
Hitchcock Scully 你们怎么这么安静啊
Hitchcock, Scully, you've been weirdly silent.
我们不想说错点什么
We didn't want to say anything
搞到自己被踢出邀请
that would get us uninvited.
机智好了大家兴奋起来
Smart. All right, get pumped, people.
犬假2015 喔喔
Dog Party '15, ooh-ooh!
两瓶伏特加
Two bottles of vodka.
我们终于要在这周末见到六杯Amy了吗
Is this gonna be the weekend we finally meet six-drink Amy?
六杯Amy 啥意思
Six-drink Amy? What does that mean?
这是Santiago酒量的顶峰
It's the pinnacle of the Santiago drunkenness scale.
一杯下肚就会变得有点迟钝
One drink, Amy's a little spacey.
等下你说啥
Wait. What?
两杯下肚讲话非常大声
Two drinks: Loud Amy.
要叫辆出租车吗
You want to get a cab?
三杯下肚
Three drinks:
开始乱舞
Amy dance pants.
四杯过后变得有些猥琐
Four-drink Amy is a bit of a pervert.
嘿看这个
Hey, check it out.
五杯之后
And five-drink Amy
变得奇怪的有自信
is weirdly confident.
咱来掰手腕吧小不点
Let's do this, little man.
但我从没见过六杯过后的Amy
But I've never seen six-drink Amy.
也许我能跟她真的成为朋友
Maybe she's the one I could actually be friends with,
也就是我的大脚野人
aka my sasquatch.
嘿美女
Hey, there, beautiful.
Marcus 你在这儿干什么
Marcus, what are you doing here?
我知道你把手♥机♥充电器弄丢了
I know you lost your phone charger,
所以我给你买♥♥了个新的还有我想确定一下
so I got you a new one, and I want to make sure
你手♥机♥充满电没有
your phone's all juiced up
好跟我甜蜜地发短♥信♥
for some sweet long-distance texting.
谢谢我欠你多少钱
Thanks. What do I owe you?
这是礼物
It's a gift.
只要说谢谢就可以了
All you got to say is thank you.
我说了谢谢这是我说的第一句话
I said thank you. That was the first thing I said.
对不起你真好
Sorry. You're nice.
我会给你短♥信♥的
I'll text you.
我等着哦
Can't wait.
不合时宜的工作亲亲
Inappropriate work kiss.
太快了你拦不住我
Too fast. Can't stop me.
Rosa D 在街上跟宝贝亲密
Rosa D macking down with her boo on the street!
我喜欢
I love it.
再说宝贝我就朝你肚子开一枪
Say "Boo" Again, I will shoot you in the stomach.
好吧就叫美男子吧
Fine. "Lover boy" It is.
我刚刚怎么说的 Charles
What did I just say, Charles?
我怎么说的 - 你说
What did I just say? - You said...
你让我不要说
you said not to say it.
Peralta 我以为你已经走了
Peralta, I thought you already left.
是啊我结了几个案
Yeah, I closed a couple of cases
要完成一些文件
and had to finish up the paperwork.