神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S02E14

Part 5 Aug. 16, 2021, 3:04 p.m.

This is just a stupid fight about nothing.
我可不想我们就因为这个分手
I'm not gonna let us break up over this.
Jake 我们俩的工作就不相容
Jake, our jobs are incompatible.
我们的生活也充满矛盾
Our lives are incompatible.
这样呢我们以后再也不谈论工作上的事情
Look, we'll just never talk about work,
也不跟彼此的朋友互动
or interact with each other's friends,
或者也不在公共场合承认彼此
or acknowledge each other in public,
我知道这听起来像描述敌人
and I know this sounds like I'm describing enemies,
但我们可以成功的
but we can make this work.
我们就是罗密欧和朱丽叶
We're Romeo and Juliet.
但是罗密欧和朱丽叶可没成功
It didn't work for Romeo and Juliet.
他们的结局是悲惨地双双自杀了
That play ends in a tragic double suicide.
结局是那样吗
That's how it ends?
那为什么人们还这么喜欢那剧
Why do people like it so much?
好吧这样 Jake 你很有意思好吗
All right, look. Jake, you're fun, okay?
我们不过也只约会了三个月
And we've only been dating for three months.
也没有那么认真
It's just not that serious.
恩但是对我来说很认真
Well, it's kinda serious to me.
我都不小心说了四遍"我爱你"了
I've accidentally said, "I love you," Like, four times already.
我知道我
I know. I-
我只是不认为我恰巧也爱你
I just don't think I accidentally love you back.
明白吗只不过太多事情要做了
Look, it's just... it's just so much work.
我愿意做这些事情
That's work I'm willing to do.
我不愿意
I'm not.
对不起
I'm sorry.
双双自杀
Double suicide?
你好啊 Madeline
Hello, Madeline.
Raymond 我正准备给你电♥话♥呢
Raymond. I was just about to call you.
我想谢谢你好心的推荐
I wanted to thank you for your kind recommendation.
我想给你这个
And I wanted to give you this.
<女巫前传>的票
Wicked.
Beth Danube主演
Starring Beth Danube.
算你狠 Raymond
Well played, Raymond.
但不幸的是呢我恐怕是用不上这票了
Sadly, I won't be able to use them.
因为我不会调去波士顿 - 什么
Since I'm not going to Boston. - What?
我不过是假借对波士顿的工作感兴趣
I was only interested in the Boston offer as leverage.
来得到在纽约市警♥察♥局的升迁
I used it to get a promotion from the NYPD.
我现在可是对你有着
I have never had more power over you
从未有过的权力
than I do at this very moment.
为了感谢你我只好把这些票还你
I wanted to give you these as a thank you.
你在开玩笑
You're joking.
我要给局长打电♥话♥
I'm gonna call the commissioner.
嘘嘘嘘嘘
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
我知道你绝不会推荐我去波士顿
I know you never would have recommended me for that Boston post
如果你内心深处认为我不能胜任那份工作
if deep down you didn't think I deserved the job.
搞什么
What the...
这一轮我请了谢谢你们
A thank you round of drinks
敬Amy - 哦
and a toast to Amy. - Oh.
你解决冲突的能力
Your conflict resolution skills
使我童年时的美梦成真
has made my childhood dreams come true.
我终于可以成为一个男花童了
I'm gonna be a ring bearer.
你难道不认为你♥爸♥爸会让你当伴郎吗
You don't think your dad will make you best man?
哦我觉得他想让Jake当
Oh, I just assumed he'd ask Jake.
挪过去点拜托我可有一个婚礼要筹划
Mm. Move over, please. I do have a wedding to plan.
既然事已至此
'Cause if this thing is happening,
我可不会让它变成Boyle爷俩的活动
it's not going to be a Boyle brothers event.
首先所有的伴娘
For starters, all the bridesmaids
都要穿成<罗珊娜>中罗珊娜的样子
are gonna be dressed like Roseanne from the television show, Roseanne.
<罗珊娜>1988到1997播出的情景喜剧女主人公超重一般打扮成蓝领工人的样子
哦我喜欢那个剧
Oh, I like that show.
一个持证的萨满巫师会主持典礼
A certified shaman will conduct the ceremony,
花童要是一匹货真价实的狼
and the ring bearer will be an actual wolf.
天啊我也可以做到但我四肢着地不会那么雄伟
Oh man, I could do it, but I wouldn't be as majestic on all fours.
这个婚礼听起来怪怪的我喜欢
This wedding sounds weird. I'm into it.
敬Lynn和Darlene Boyle夫妇
To Lynn and Darlene Boyle.
干杯
Cheers.
恶心
Yuck.
女朋友离我而去
My lady left me.
女对头不离不弃
My lady stayed.
别这样老大
Come on, sir.
要关注好的方面
Focus on the good.
你可以抬头挺胸了
You can hold your head up:
你选择了高尚的方式对待Wuntch
you took the high road with Wuntch.
也没有
Not entirely.
我一个人在她办公室的时候修改了她的自动纠错系统
When I was alone in her office, I changed her auto-correct.
现在如果她打"Wuntch" 就会被改成"屁♥股♥"
Now when she types "Wuntch," It gets replaced with "Butt."
啊我真不该去参加那个派对
Ah, I should not have gone to that party.
我真不该跟着去厕所
I shouldn't have gone to that bathroom.
我真不该逮捕了她上司
I should not have arrested her boss.
我不这样认为
I don't see it that way.
你每件事都做对了你是一个好警♥察♥
You did everything right. You were a good cop.
好孤单的警♥察♥
Good lonely cop.
嘿兄弟你已经努力争取了
Hey, man, you put yourself out there.
你可没嬉皮笑脸的
You weren't breezy.
你喜欢Sophia 你也为了她争取过
You like Sophia, you fought for her.
你应该为自己骄傲
You should be proud.
不你应该改她的自动纠错系统
No, you should be changing her auto-correct.
她姓什么
What's her last name?
Perez - 不再是了
Perez. - No.
现在也是"屁♥股♥"了
It's "Butt" Now.
Sophia 屁♥股♥
Sophia Butt.
感觉不错不是吗
That's feels good, doesn't it?
并没有
Not really.
好吧
Okay.
让我们不醉不归
Then let's get soused.
啊好吧好吧好吧好好好好
Ah, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
我的我的
Mine. Mine.