神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S03E17

Part 1 Oct. 2, 2020, 9:41 a.m.

Hey Jake, can I show you something over here?
嘿 Jake 过来帮我看一下好吗
Sure thing, bud.
没问题哥们儿
I'm trying to send Genevieve a sexy pic.
我想给Genevieve发一张性感照片
Does this make my bubble butt pop?
这么看我屁屁翘吗
Nope. I'm out.
算了我后悔了
Who's that? I don't know.
这谁不知道
Um, excuse me, pal. Think you're at my desk.
呃不好意思这是我的办公桌
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
喔喔喔
Drop it! Drop the weapon!
放下放下武器
Don't be a dum-dum.
别做傻事
Squad, meet Detective Adrian Pimento.
同志们这是Adrian Pimento警探
He's been deep undercover for the last 12 years,
他深入潜伏了十二年
but he's just resurfaced, and he's rejoining the Nine-Nine.
最近刚刚结束现在要回到99片区
That...is...
简直
awesome!
棒呆
Some of you just met Detective Pimento,
你们中有的人是刚刚第一次见Pimento警探
and, of course, some of you knew him before he went undercover.
有的则在他去卧底前就认识他了
Hitchcock and Scully. Ha. You guys still work here?
Hitchcock和Scully 你俩居然还在这儿工作
The only way they're getting rid of us is in a body bag.
他们摆脱我们的唯一方式就是把我们装进运尸袋
It actually happened once, but it was a false alarm.
其实他们真装过一次但那次只是虚惊一场
Detective Pimento will be returning to his old desk.
Pimento警探会回到他原来的办公桌工作
Peralta will temporarily be moved to the break room.
Peralta暂时搬去休息室
Questions?
有问题吗
What'd you do undercover?
你卧底的时候是干什么的
I worked for Jimmy "The Butcher" Figgis.
我替 "屠夫" Jimmy Figgis干活
That is an A-list mobster. Tell me literally everything.
他可是A级犯罪团伙成员把那里的一切都告诉我
Everyone, shut up!
所有人都闭嘴
Pretty much just a bagman for him.
我基本上就是替他收钱
I mean, I did some other stuff.
不过也干点别的啦
Um, we usually try to tell funnier little stories.
我们一般都会讲搞笑的事儿
Well, there's nothing funny about what I did for The Butcher.
但是我替屠夫做的事一点都不搞笑
I've had to learn not to blink,
我必须要学会不眨眼
because every time I close my eyes, I see a fresh horror.
因为每次我一闭眼我眼前都是一片恐怖景象
Ooh, dark.
哇哦重口
But how do you keep your eyes moist?
可是你怎么能保持眼睛湿润呢
Actually, I have a very funny story about
其实关于保持眼睛湿润
keeping my eyes moist.
我有一个很好笑的故事
Come on...
很搞笑吧
Nope.
并没有
Still not getting that vibe, man.
还是没懂你的笑点
Really? Mmmm.
真的吗嗯嗯
I'll get there. That's my bad, everybody.
我会继续努力的同志们是我的错
Dismissed.
解散
Sir,
长官
can I partner with Pimento on my B&E?
我可以让Pimento跟我一起跟进破门侵入案吗
That guy is awesome.
他真的棒呆了
He's like a real life Donnie Brasco.
他简直就是现实版的<忠奸人>
Isn't Donnie Brasco a really sad movie that ends terribly?
<忠奸人>不是结局很惨吗
Yeah, but he's got that cool jacket,
对但是他有那件很酷的夹克
and he's always down at the docks.
而且总是在码头
I'm not sure I want you working with Pimento.
我不确定我想不想让你跟Pimento一起工作
He's a little unstable.
他有点情绪不稳定
Machine!
破机器
Psychologically, this could be a very difficult transition.
在他的心理上这是一个艰难的过渡期
Yeah, I know, I went undercover.
我懂的我也做了63天卧底
63 days, no big deal. You probably forgot.
没什么大不了的你可能忘了
No, it's your outgoing voice mail message.
怎么可能忘得了这就是你的语♥音♥信箱留言
Hey, it's Jake.
嘿我是Jake
Can't get to the phone right now.
暂时不能接电♥话♥
I might be undercover again, like I was for 63 days.
我可能又要去卧底了就像上次去卧底了63天一样
Bye!
拜拜
Look, I know what he's going through.
听着我知道他现在在经历什么
Let me be the man that brings him in from the cold.
让我来引领他走出黑暗吧
All right, he can work the B&E with you.
好吧他可以和你一起跟进破门侵入案
Just make sure you take it easy.
但是你一定要淡定
Uh, sir, I was 20 minutes late for work today.
呃长官我今早迟到了20分钟
I don't think you need to tell me about taking it easy.
你用不着提醒我要淡定
Are you bragging about being a bad employee?
你是在吹嘘自己是一个不称职的员工吗
No.
不是
Dismissed? Me?
解散了我
I figured out the best way
我想出了一个好方法来
to welcome Pimento to the Nine-Nine.
欢迎Pimento重回99区
Stay out of his way, maybe buy him a drink,
不要碍他的事或许可以请他喝东西
not do anything weird?
但是不要做奇怪的事
I'm making him a goat stew.
我正在给他炖山羊肉
Huh...all right.
呃好吧
Yeah, now, this Turkmenistani dish
这是一道土库曼斯坦传统菜
is traditionally made from an animal that's been so overfed
里面的肉用的是那种肥到站不起来的
it can no longer stand.
山羊身上的
That's the dream.
简直是我的梦想啊
Everything is authentic.
这些都是有根据的
I even ordered the pressure cooker
我甚至还从土库曼斯坦
from Turkmenistan.
订了一个高压锅
So you're on a terrorist watch list now?
所以你现在上了恐♥怖♥分♥子♥监视名单咯
Oh, yeah, Homeland Security's been in my house, yep.
没错国土安♥全♥局♥的人已经去过我家了
Now, this just needs to cook for another 11 hours, 32 minutes,
现在只需要再炖11个小时32分钟
and 6--
再加6
What the hell, Boyle! You almost killed me!
搞什么鬼 Boyle 你差点杀了我
I'm not going out in a stew-making accident!
我才不要在炖羊肉事故中挂掉
Terry's gonna die saving the President,
Terry要为总统护驾而死
or Terry's never gonna die!
不然老子就要永生不死
There's no way we can clean this up by ourselves.
我们不可能自己把这里打扫干净
We're gonna need help.
我们需要帮助
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
不不不不不
What are you saying?
你什么意思
You know what she's saying, man.
你知道她什么意思
Oh, no.
噢不
Mean Marge.
要去找刻薄Marge了
So we're supposed to come running to clean up your mess
所以每次你的小肥指头一打响指
every time you snap your fat little fingers?
我们都得跑去给你收拾烂摊子吗
Oh, no, no, I actually can't snap my fingers,
不不其实我不会打响指
they're always too wet.
因为我的指头一直都很湿
And I just thought, since it's your job--
我觉得因为这是你们的工作
Oh, I see.
我懂了
You cops think you're too good to clean up after yourselves?
你们这些警♥察♥都认为自己逼格高所以不用打扫是吧
Uh--no, I can do it myself, I'll just--
不是我可以自己打扫我会
That's union work!
这是工会的工作
How dare you try to steal our jobs.
你好大的胆子居然敢抢我们的工作
So where do we go from here?
那我们下一步怎么办
Well, you know the old saying,
有句谚语说得好
"The only way to unclog a toilet is to let it sit."
"通厕所的最好办法就是让它堵着吧"
You're a janitor. You should know that's not true.
你是清洁人员你知道这是不对的吧
Boys, take out the trash.
伙计们去把垃圾倒了
Oh, great! So you will do it?
太棒了所以你会帮我们清理啦
Oh! I'm the trash, I get it.
噢我就是垃圾我懂了
Okay, that makes more sense with your tone.
难怪你的语气是那样
Oops! Oh... Love you, Marge.
哎呀爱你哦 Marge
You wanted to see me, sir?
长官你要见我
Yes, I have a special project for you.
对我有一个特殊任务给你
Okay, but I'll have you know right now
好哒不过我得跟你说
I only fly first class.
我只坐头等舱
I'm not flying you anywhere.
并没有要你坐飞机去哪儿的意思
I made an application to the M.C. Guffin Foundation
我向M.C. Guffin基金会申请
for a grant to upgrade our office equipment.
拨款来升级我们办公室的设备
Unfortunately, they require a video submission.
不幸的是他们要求提交一个视频
I understand you have some filmmaking experience.
我知道你之前有过视频制♥作♥的经历
Well, you know, I've been re-Vined by Rob Kardashian,
那必须我的视频在Vine上可是被卡戴珊弟弟转发过的
so, yeah, I'm a director.
所以是的我是个导演
Here's what I'm picturing:
这是我的想法
I enter, in, like, a Fellini-style getup.
我以费里尼风格的装束入场