神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S03E02

Part 3 Oct. 2, 2020, 9:38 a.m.

Look where my elbow's pointing.
看我的胳膊肘指在哪儿
It's Davis Garmin,
是戴维斯·高明
Chief of Detectives.
总警监
Holt said he could overrule the Vulture.
霍尔特说他能管秃鹫
Exactly.
正是
The only question now is, will he believe us?
现在唯一的问题是他会相信我们吗
Yes, 'cause we're gonna take a page
会的因为我们要从秃鹫那儿
from the Vulture's book.
学一招[直译为从书上撕下一页]
"The Big Book of Small Butts"? What?
"小屁♥股♥的大名堂"吗什么
It's the only thing I've ever seen him read.
这是我见过他看的唯一一本书
No, we're gonna secretly record the Vulture
不我们要悄悄地录下
telling you to dump me.
秃鹫让你甩掉我的话
Then we'll play it for Chief Garmin.
然后放给高明总监听
Then...
然后
We're gonna totally
我们就能
have sex on top of each other.
尽情地做♥爱♥了
You get to keep your job.
你就能保住工作了
Yes, that.
对这才是重点
Ooh, Charles, your jump-off is here.
哦查理你该上了
Hello, Detective.
哈喽警探
Hello, Lieutenant.
哈喽警督
Real tragic about the captain.
警监的事真是太让人伤心了
Yes, real tragic.
是的悲痛欲绝
I like the way your butt looks today.
我喜欢今天你屁♥股♥的样子
I've been doing lunges in the shower.
我洗澡的时候有在运动
Well, this got upsetting real quick.
已经没什么好看的了
I want to live in this moment forever.
我真想永远都看着这一幕
I got us a motel room across the street.
我在对面旅店订好了房♥间
Meet me there in 15 minutes.
十五分钟后去找我
I'll meet you, all right.
好的我会去的
M-e-a-t.
吃了你哦
Still think it's creepy?
依然觉得很怪异吗
Yes.
是
Charles, it is not like you to have sex
查理跟一个完全陌生的人上♥床♥
with a total stranger.
可不像是你会做的事
Really, tell that to me in an hour
是吗一小时后你就不会这么说了
when we've had sex 23 times.
那会儿我们已经做了二十三次了
There you are.
你在这儿
You okay, sir?
你还好吗长官
No.
不好
Until this morning, some small part of me
直到今天早上我心里的某处还在相信
still believed I would be captain of the Nine-Nine again.
我会再次成为九九区的警监
What a fool I was.
我太傻了
I should never have returned.
我根本就不该回来
It's like visiting your childhood home
就像是重回儿时的住所
and seeing it's been replaced by a denim pants store.
却发现它已经被一家粗布衣店代替了
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
喔喔喔
Slow down, sir.
悠着点儿
You didn't even stop and sniff the bouquet.
你都没停下来闻一闻酒香
You always sniff the bouquet.
你总是要闻闻酒香的
Maybe the old Holt did.
或许过去的霍尔特会闻
But the new Holt chugs Beaujolais
但现在的霍尔特一口气从勃艮特酒杯里
from a Burgundy glass without a care.
喝完博若莱红酒一点感觉也没有
Oh, it's a Sauternes glass.
哦这是苏特恩酒杯
Look, the alcohol has rendered me a simpleton.
看酒精已经让我变傻了
Maybe you should just call it a day.
或许你该回去休息了
I can't.
不行
I've been asked to deliver a toast here after the funeral,
葬礼完后我得敬酒
a message of hope.
关于希望的讲话
This is what I have so far.
听听我目前想到的
"Pain..."
"痛苦"
That's it.
没了
One tweak...
一个小建议
maybe you should lose the word "Pain"
或许你该忘了痛苦这两个字
and then get in a cab and go home.
打辆车回家去
Maybe I will.
或许我该照做
But first, you're gonna have one drink with me, Sergeant.
但是警长你得先陪我喝一杯
For old times' sake?
看在过去的情分上
One drink, and then we go. One drink.
只喝一杯然后我们就走就一杯
My tolerance has really changed since I had kids!
自从有了孩子我的耐受力就大不如前了
Hey, Captain.
嘿警监
I was looking for you inside.
我刚在里面找你呢
One thing I won't do is fart in church.
老子从来不在教堂里放屁
This is God's house.
那可是上帝的地盘
Oh.
哦
Respectful.
真有敬意
So listen, remember when you said to me
是这样还记得你跟我说
that I have to dump Santiago
我必须得甩掉桑提亚戈
or else you're gonna bust me down to beat cop?
否则你就要把我降级到巡警吗
What I remember, Jake, is you pretending to be my bro
杰克我记得的是你装作是我的兄弟
and me being like, "I'm onto you, dillweed.
然后我像是 "被我发现了吧"
Oh, uh, sorry, could you say that one more time?
嗯抱歉你能再说一遍吗
I couldn't hear you over the bagpipes.
有风笛声我听不到你说话
Ugh, one second.
嗯稍等
Excuse me, could you stop playing that?
打扰一下你能不能别吹了
Just trying to have a conversation.
我们在谈话
I'm warming up, man. Sorry.
我在热身排练抱歉
Yeah, I know. We just need two minutes.
嗯我知道我们只要一小会儿
No can do.
爱莫能助
The funeral's about to start.
葬礼要开始了
Everyone wants to hear me honk, so...
大家都想听我演奏所以
Do you really need to warm up, though?
你真的需要热身吗
I mean, you're just gonna make a terrible wall of sound.
反正你也就只是个背景
First of all, that's offensive to me as half Scottish.
首先作为半个苏格兰人你这样说是在冒犯我
Second of all, you think you could do better?
其次你觉得自己能吹的更好吗
Blow my bag.
把我的袋子吹起来
Look, we just need a couple of minutes to chat.
我们只是需要一小会儿聊聊
That's it.
仅此而已
I'm not gonna stop playing until you blow it.
你要是不吹我是不会停的
All right, just give it to me.
好吧给我
All right?
行了吧
Prepare to hear me play the bagpipes perfectly.
准备好大吃一惊吧
Okay.
没问题
Oh, my God.
哦天哪
Point proven.
我可以吧
Yeah, I think I've heard just about enough
好了我已经听够了
of this catfight.
这场闹剧
I'm out.
我走了
Wait, Captain! Sir!
等一下警监长官
Your boyfriend... sorry, your ex-boyfriend is pathetic.
你男朋友抱歉你前男友太可悲了
You should be glad that I ordered him to dump you.
我让他甩了你你应该庆幸才是
Swish, Kobe.
空心球科比
Got it.
录到了
Yes! You're amazing!
哇你太棒了
That was "We Are the Champions."
我吹的是"我们是冠军"
Ugh, it's impossible to find Garmin
呃大家都是一副哀悼脸
Garmin with everybody mourning all over the place.
怎么找的到
It's like they have no respect for our sneaky plans.
一点都不尊重我们的秘密计划
I know.
是啊
Oh, look, there he is.
看他在那儿
Oh, great.
太好了
Hi there.
哈喽
Sorry, this area is reserved
抱歉这里仅供
for close personal friends of the deceased.
与逝者关系密切的亲友入内
Ah, well, that is us.
我们正好是
Dozerman and I were pretty much besties.
多泽曼和我是铁哥们
Went on an annual fishing trip together.
我们每年都要来一次垂钓之旅
Cayuga Lake, caught a lot of Coho salmon.
去卡尤加湖钓银鲑鱼收获颇丰
We are both so bummed that he's dead.
他突然辞世真是令我们无比震惊
Super bummed.
超级震惊的