绝望的主妇

Desperate Housewives S01E15

Part 2 Oct. 22, 2019, 10:47 a.m.

没人会同情弱者
Nobody respects a shrinking violet.
又不是只能有一种领导风格
There is more than one, you know, leadership style.
我是低调点但是很有效率
Mine is quiet but... Effective.
带上你们的球棍出去
Take that racket outside!
你自己喜欢就行了
Whatever works for you.
苏珊
Susan!
美女去哪了
Hey, sexy. Where you been?
我给你打了两次电♥话♥ 你在躲我吗
I called you twice. You avoiding me?
我怎么会躲你呢
Don't be silly. Why would I do that?
我就是忙着买♥♥杂货而已
No, I've been really busy grocery shopping.
买♥♥了两天你这是在囤货啊
For two days? You must be pretty well stocked.
晚上一块吃晚饭吧
How about dinner tonight?
晚饭今天
Dinner... Tonight? Um...
你没事吧
You ok?
你能帮我拿一下吗
Can you hold these a sec?
趴在车上
Up against the car!
你有权保持沉默
You have the right to remain silent.
你所说的一切都可能
Anything you do say can be used
作为呈堂证供
against you in a court of law.
你有权利雇佣律师
You have the right to consult an attorney...
跟你们说
So get this.
扎克·杨♥周♥六晚上要举♥行♥泳装派对
Zach Young's throwing a pool party saturday night.
发了一堆正式请柬用的还是花体字
He sent out a bunch formal invitations.Complete with fancy lettering.
我倒是奇怪他干嘛不洒点须后水上去
I'm surprised he didn't spritz them with aftershave.
请柬做的漂亮不对吗
What is wrong with nice invitations?
妈妈是泳装派对
Mom, it's a pool party.
他直接在院子里发几张传♥单♥就好了
Why couldn't he have just passed out flyers in the quad.
因为他天生就当不了正常人
'Cause he's genetically incapable of being cool.
那你们去吗
So, uh... Are you going?
可能吧
Uh... Maybe.
莉莎和贾斯汀还有其他几个朋友
I mean, um, Lisa and Justin and some of the guys
觉得游游泳也挺有意思的
thought it'd be fun to swim.
如果真的很无聊的话我们溜掉就是了
We can always bail if it's lame as we think it's going to be..
莉莎是你那个穿了脐环的朋友
Oh, is, um, Lisa your friend with the pierced navel?
是啊
Yeah.
你们最近老在一块玩是吗
You've been spending a lot of time together lately. Haven't you?
差不多吧
I guess.
安德鲁我希望你周六晚上11点前回家
Oh, uh, Andrew, I'm gonna want you home by 11 on saturday.
11点周日又不上学
11? Mom, it's not even a school night!
宵禁是没有用的
Bree, a curfew isn't gonna do any good.
你可能愿意放弃
You may be able to abdicate
作为家长的职责
all your parental responsibility,
我可不会
But I cannot.
到底是怎么回事
What... What's going on here?
这是不是跟你放在我房♥间那个安全套有关
Was this have to do with the condom you left in my room?
事实上没错我们得明确一件事
As a matter of fact, it does. And just so we're clear,
如果你让莉莎怀孕了你就得娶她
if you get Lisa pregnant, you will marry her.
安德鲁这一点也不搞笑
Andrew, this is not funny.
妈妈相信我这很搞笑
Mom, trust me. This is very funny.
主要是因为这个安全套不是我的
Mostly because the condom wasn't mine.
你是个混♥蛋♥ 知道吗
You suck, you know that?
很明显我们需要谈谈
So obviously we need to talk.
我还是处♥女♥ 如果你想知道的话
I'm still a virgin, if that's what you want to know.
不错
Well, good.
但你为什么会需要安全套呢
But why on earth would you need a condom?
因为我准备做♥爱♥ 而且不想怀孕
Because I'm planning on having sex and not want to get pregnant.
丹妮尔你是禁欲俱乐部的主席
Danielle, you are president of the abstinence club.
我下学期打算卸任了
I wasn't planning on running for a second term.
你打算和谁做♥爱♥呢
Who were you planning on having sex with?
约翰
John.
约翰·罗兰我还以为你把他甩了
John Rowland. I thought you broke up with him.
没有是他把我甩了
No. He broke up with me.
你知道为什么吗因为我不想做♥爱♥
You want to know why, because I wouldn't do it.
要是他是这种男孩分了更好
If that's the type of boy he is, then good riddance.
妈学校里的男孩子都是这种人
Mom, every boy at my school is that type of boy.
而且约翰不一样
And besides, it's different with John.
我爱他
I love him.
宝贝靠性来取悦男孩
Sweetheart, just because you give a boy sex
不一定能得到对方的爱
doesn't mean you'll get love in return.
也许我就是犯傻
So maybe I'm being stupid.
那又怎么样呢只不过是上♥床♥而已
What's the big deal? It's just sex.
我在乎你的幸福
I am looking over for your happiness.
我能理解年轻时的那种冲动
I understand what it's like to be young and feel urges.
不过我一直等到结婚你♥爸♥爸也是
But I waited until I got married. As did your father.
那样好得多
And it was so much better.
但是爸爸最终背叛了你
But daddy ended up cheating on you.
是那个
Yes. Well...
现在他搬回来了你就更痛苦了
And ever since he moved back, you've been miserable.
你为什么这么说
Why would you say that?
我们卧室间的墙壁像纸一样薄
The walls between our bedrooms are paper thin.
我听到了很多我不该听的
I hear more stuff than I probably should.
妈妈我很爱你
Look, mom, I love you a lot,
但是你真的是最没资格
But you really are the last person ever
给别人关于性与幸福的建议的人了
to give anyone advice about sex and happiness.
看到这些了吗又有五份欠费通知了
Have you seen these? Five more past due notices.
别担心我正在想办法
Don't worry, I'm handling it.
你有什么办法
How are you handling it?
能不能让我先把三明治吃完
Can I please finish my sandwich?
看到我们的银行账户了吗我们破产了
Have you seen our account? We're broke.
还有按揭要付
We have the mortgage payment coming up...
还有不动产税要交还有
we have property taxes, we have...
加布会好起来的
Gaby, it's gonna be ok.
不会我们真的完蛋了
No, it's not. We are seriously screwed.
而且我很担心你一点都不上心
And I am freaking out that you're not freaking out.
-会好起来的 -什么时候
- Look, things will turn around. - When?
我也不知道
I don't know when.
不过我们是幸运儿好运会再来
But we're lucky people. And we'll be lucky again.
-那是什么 -割草机
- What is that? - It's the lawn mower.
今天我们有了个新园丁
We got a new gardener today.
不用花一分钱这孩子是约翰的一个朋友
It won't cost us a cent. The kid's a friend of John's.
-卡洛斯 -他说他可以给免费修整草坪
- Carlos... - And he said he'd do the lawn for free.
难以置信吧我们是幸运儿
Can you believe it? We are lucky people.
同志们很高兴又见到你们
Hey, guys, good to see you again.
别那么郁闷你能得分的
Don't look so glum. You'll get a hit.
不是因为这个
Oh, it's not that.
这个是我"讨厌蒂姆·杜根"的表情
This is my "hating Tim Duggan" look.
杜根又得分了
Oh, Duggan connects.
瞧
There!
瞧这磨洋工的混♥蛋♥跑起来那样儿
Look at that job-stealing bastard run.
杜根总是热衷于邀功希宠
Duggan is really showing some of that glory-hounding,
溜须拍马他最擅长不过了
Ass-kissing hustle that he is so well-known for.
我都忘了你在不爽的时候是多么可爱了
I forgot how much fun you are when you're bitter.
他在跑更多的垒
Look, he's stretching for extra bases.
就像他将魔手伸向更多的领域
Just like he stretched for extra territory,
欺负被埋没的全能选手汤姆·斯加沃
screwing over unsung utility player, Tom Scavo.
杜根摔倒了
Oh! Down goes Duggan.
杜根摔倒了很疼吧
Duggan goes down. That's gotta hurt.
马屁精触杀出局
Oh, Lord! Hound is tagged out, and now he's gonna
看来蒂姆·杜根这一跤摔得不轻
have to deal with some tough dirt stains, that Tim Duggan.
汤姆
Tom...
不我相信他只是装模作样
No, I'm sure he's just grandstanding.
天哪
Oh, my god!
见鬼
Holy crap!
不过是个游泳池派对而已大家都会去
It's only a pool party. Everyone is going to be there.
我说不行
I said no.
你想怎么样
What are you goning to do?
难道要让我18岁之前不接触任何男孩
Keep a boy-free zone around me until I'm 18?
一两年内你可以接触男孩但不要是他
You can see boys, in a couple years, just not that boy.
你为什么讨厌扎克
Why do you hate Zach?
我不是讨厌扎克就是觉得他有点疯
I don't hate Zach. I just think he's sort of crazy.