同志亦凡人（2000）

Queer as Folk S02E19

Part 3 Oct. 21, 2020, 3:01 p.m.

"Ted Schmidt woke one morning from fitful dreams
「泰德·施密特有天早上从断断续续的梦里醒来
to find himself transformed in his bed into a giant vagina."
发现自己变成了一个巨大的阴♥道♥」
Worse.
比这还糟
I'm...
我...
Immune.
免疫了
To penicillin?
对青霉素免疫吗
To clever literary references?
对精妙的文学引用吗
To porn.
对色情片
I look at it and it has no effect on me.
我看着它它已经对我不起作用了
Zippo. Nada.
一点反应都没有
I totally lost interest in it.
我已经完全失去兴趣了
And I didn't even know it.
我之前都没意识到
One day, suddenly, it's...
有一天突然间
Just gone.
感觉就消失了
You know what they say.
你也知道人们常说的那句话
Too much of a good thing...
好事过头反而...
You're not helping.
你这是在帮倒忙
I've seen all my wildest fantasies fulfilled,
我将我最狂野的性幻想都变成实际了
live and uncensored right before my eyes,
现场版无♥码♥未删减就在我眼前
Over, and over...
一遍一遍...
And over... I got it.
又一遍我明白了
So may... maybe I need to...
所以或许我需要
lay off for a while, you know, just...
暂停一段时间
Just give it a rest.
休息一阵子
Or maybe you need to stop watching and do.
也许你应该亲身体验而不是观看
What's your most secret sexual fantasy?
你最最隐秘的性幻想是什么
Are you crazy?
你疯了吧
I'm not telling you that.
我不会告诉你的
Fine.
好吧
Live out the remainder of your days condemned to sexual purgatory.
那你就余生都在性♥爱♥的炼狱里受尽折磨吧
All right.
那好吧
But if I tell you,
如果我告诉你
do you promise not to make me feel like a fool?
你保证不让我觉得自己像个白♥痴♥吗
That would be redundant.
没必要你本来就是白♥痴♥
I may have seriously underestimated you, Theodore.
我以前或许真的太低估你了西奥多
Hey, you go, Em.
到你了小艾
Come on.
加油
Look, look! I did it, I got them all down.
快看快看我都击倒了
The next time, honey,
亲爱的记得下次
Uh, try and do it in your lane.
把球扔到自己的那个球道里
Gotta hand it to you mom,
我真佩服你妈
this match is the worst idea you have ever had.
这场比赛是你有史以来最烂的主意
Well, what was I supposed to do?
那我能怎么办啊
Let them get away with making fun of gay bowlers?
任由他们嘲笑来打球的男同没有任何后果吗
We do. Yeah well, they're cops,
我们就这样啊是没错但他们是警♥察♥
They should be held to a higher standard.
应该对他们有更高的要求
Right. We're going to do fine.
好吧我们的表现没问题的
All we need to do is practice. That's right.
我们只需要多多练习就好没错
'cause practice makes perfect.
因为熟能生巧
Brian already is perfect.
布莱恩已经很完美了
Glad you think so.
很高兴你这么想
Yeah. A little more practice,
就是啊只要再多练会儿
and I'll be perfect too.
我也会很完美的
You actually have a lot of potential, Emmett.
你的确很有潜力艾美特
For manslaughter?
过失杀人的潜力吗
You just need to work on your follow-through.
你只要再多练练挥球动作
See, wherever your hand goes, the ball goes.
你的手抛向哪里球就去哪里
So just pretend you're throwing right at the pins.
在心里假装你扔向了木瓶的方向
Throw your hand at the pins.
手瞄准瓶子
Welcome to team homo!
欢迎加入同志队
Debbie, you already have a full lineup.
黛比你的队已经满员了
We just lost a player.
我们刚刚失去了一位队友
Emmett, you're off the team.
艾美特你被踢出去了
Whatever happened to,
不是说好
"It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game"?
"输赢不重要重要的是过程"吗
Well, it needs a rewrite.
这句话需要改改了
Sorry, mom. He just got out of the hospital. It's too soon.
抱歉老妈他刚出院没休养好呢
Michael, I'm fine.
迈克我没事
And I would like you to stay that way.
我希望你一直保持没事
You shouldn't be doing anything physically strenuous.
你不应该做任何剧烈的运动
Hear that, professor?
听见没教授
No more heavy butt action.
也不能操屁♥股♥了哦
Do you mind?
你能闭嘴吗
Just looking after his health.
我只是为他的健康考虑
For Christ's sake, Michael.
老天呐迈克
Would you stop being a mother hen? That's my job.
别像个护小鸡的老母鸡那是我的任务
He says he feels fine.
他说他觉得没事
He's not bowling, and that's final.
他不能打保龄球这是最终决定
I guess I'm on the team,
我想我归队了
whether her majesty likes it or not.
不管我们的女王陛下喜不喜欢
I-I'm feeling good about this. Yes, I am.
我很有信心真的
We're good.
我们很厉害
Look who's here.
看看谁在这儿
Well, what are you, checking out the competition?
你干什么刺探军情吗
Checking it out real closely.
正密切关注着呢
I like what I see.
我喜欢我看到的情况
Hey, Vic. Hey.
你好维克你好
Leave it to my sister to get us into this.
真不愧是我姐姐把我们都卷入这事
Michael, cover your eyes.
迈克蒙住眼睛
You look like you need a drink.
你看上去像是需要喝一杯
For once, we can be alone.
我们总算能单独在一起了
Oh my... my kid's standing right there.
我的孩子还在那边站着呢
I just wanna give you a little kiss.
我只是想轻轻吻一下你
How about we go out for a drink?
我们出去喝一杯怎么样
I can't, I'm meeting with the guys. We're...
我不行我要跟他们一起我们...
We're strategizing for the game.
我们正在为这场比赛制定战略
Go ahead, I won't keep you.
去吧我就不耽搁你了
Pardon?
什么
Forget it.
当我没说
You can't just throw something like that out there
你不能这样把话说一半
and say, "Forget it".
然后来一句"当我没说"
I'm a detective,
我是个探长
I know how to read people.
我知道怎么看人
You're coming through loud and clear.
你表现得再清楚不过了
Well, I wish you were.
我希望你也能说清楚点
Every time I...
每次我试着...
try to get a little friendly, you shoot me down.
表现得更友好你都泼我冷水
No, I mean I told you. It's just that...
不我告诉过你只是...
you can't desert your team.
你不能抛弃你的队伍
If it wasn't this,
如果不是这个
you'd be stuffing envelopes for P-FLAG, or
就是要给同性恋家属联谊会装信封或者
marching for gay rights
为争取同性恋权利而游♥行♥
or some other excuse not to get close.
或者一些其他的借口不让我接近
That's bullshit.
胡说
You don't even know me.
你都不了解我
Who do we have to thank for that?
这是拜谁所赐呢
You're making too big a deal.
你有点小题大做
Too big a deal. You practically died.
小题大做你都差点死了
Yeah, but I didn't, Michael.
是但我没死迈克
I am still here.
我还活着呢
Yeah.
是啊
And I still wake up in the middle of the night
我还是会半夜惊醒
and listen to you breathe.
听听你是不是还有呼吸
Just to be sure.
只为确定一下
I don't want anything else to happen to you.
我不想你再出任何事
If it's that important,
如果这个真那么重要
you can bench my ass.
你可以让我坐冷板凳
Now stop worrying.
现在别担心了
I can't help it, I...
我忍♥不住我...
I have the genes of an Italian mother in my blood.
我骨子里就像个爱操心的意大利母亲