同志亦凡人（2000）

Queer as Folk S02E11

Part 1 Oct. 21, 2020, 2:58 p.m.

Having fun?
玩得开心吗
Oh, it's amazing.
简直太棒了
It's... I didn't realize stagette parties were this wild.
简直... 我没想到单身派对会这么狂野
It's the warm-up for your honeymoon.
这只是给你们的蜜月热热身
Now come on, follow the Leda.
来跟着领头人丽达走
This way.
这边
Is this the happy couple?
这就是即将成婚的幸福爱侣吗
Sickening, isn't it?
超棒的对吧
They want their fortune told.
她们想来算个命
Please, I am not a gypsy, Rose-Louise.
拜托我不是吉普赛人罗丝·李
I am a trained Tarotitian.
我是个专业的塔罗大♥师♥
Now... Shall we see what the cards have in store?
好了要看看这些牌揭露了什么天机吗
When is the special day?
婚礼是哪天呢
This Saturday.
这周六
What? What?
怎么了怎么了
I'm sorry, girls,
很遗憾姑娘们
but you can't possibly get married this Saturday.
你们不可能在这周六结婚
Didn't you know?
你们难道不知道吗
Mercury is in retrograde.
水星逆行
A time of extreme imbalance in the universe.
这段时间宇宙极度不平衡
Upheaval. Miscommunication. And misunderstandings
大变动沟通不当以及误解
Resulting in serious discord for everyone.
导致所有人都会遭遇不和
Yeah, but is it going to rain?
好吧那天会下雨吗
Signing contracts, making pacts, taking vows. No.
签下契约达成协议宣读誓言都是大忌
No. Not now.
不行时间不合适
It'll be a total disaster. A catastrophe.
绝对是场灾难一场浩劫
But... on a positive note,
但是往好的一面看
You'll redecorate your dining room around June
六月份左右你们会重新装饰餐厅
in aqua and maroon.
装成浅绿色和栗色
And it will be stunning.
简直超级漂亮
So, what do you get two dykes who have everything?
那两个拉拉什么都有了还能送什么礼物
Dykes don't have everything.
拉拉并不是什么都有
That's why they're so miserable.
所以她们才那么可悲
Well, unfortunately, matching penis transplants
不幸的是赞助一个阴♥茎♥植入手术
are a little pricey for a poor shopkeeper like myself.
对我这样的小店主来说太贵了
Silver-plated dental dams?
镀银牙科橡皮障怎么样
Ooh, a specially engraved double-headed dildo?
一个特别打造的双头假鸡♥巴♥怎么样
How about stemware?
买♥♥些高脚杯怎么样
Honey, dildos are stemware.
亲爱的假鸡♥巴♥就是高脚杯
A water buffalo.
一头水牛
What?
什么
Lesbians are into endangered species.
拉拉可是濒危动物
Yeah, unfortunately they aren't one of them.
是啊但不幸的是她们两个不是
Oh, you guys are brutal.
你们太恶毒了
We need to get them something that shows we care.
我们要送点能表示我们在意她们的东西
Something special.
一些特别的东西
Well, I'd go shopping with you,
我可以跟你一起去逛街
But, uh,
但是
I'm actually picking out a very special gift for myself.
我是要给自己选一份特别的礼物
Yes, boys. I have finally saved up enough cash
没错兄弟们我终于存够了钱
whacking away on Teddy's house of porn,
这全靠在泰迪的色情屋打飞机
to buy me that brand new ass I've always wanted.
现在我可以去买♥♥一个我一直想要的新屁♥股♥了
You're really getting plastic surgery?
你真要去做整形手术啊
The landscape is littered with slaves to beauty
那种地方挤满了「美貌奴隶」
who have noses that are too small, tits that are too big.
有些人鼻子过小有些人奶♥子♥过大
You could end up the next cosmetic casualty.
你可能会死在整容手术台上
It's true. What if they make a mistake?
就是啊要是他们出错了怎么办
Like accidentally sewing up your ass hole?
比如一不小心缝合了你的屁♥眼♥
Well, you'll just have to chew me a new one.
那你就给我咬出一个新的来
You're so good at it.
你在这方面挺擅长的
At least wait a week until mercury's out of retrograde.
至少再过一周等水星恢复正常再说
Boy, you actually believe in that shit?
天呐你还真信这个啊
There is evidence that upheavals in our solar system
有证据表面太阳系的大变动
can cause disturbances here on earth.
可能会导致地球上的紊乱
Blaming the planets for your fuck-ups
将自己的不幸怪罪到行星身上
is just an excuse not to accept responsibility.
只是为不想承担责任找借口罢了
Gentlemen!
先生们
It's time to pick the winner
现在是抽取自♥由♥大道
of the Liberty Avenue AIDS hospice charity raffle.
艾滋收♥容♥所♥慈善大奖的时候了
Now somebody's going on an all-expense paid trip for two
获奖者会赢得本周末去迈阿密参加白色派对的
to this weekend's white party in Miami.
双人免费旅行的机会
Can I get a drum roll please?
来点鼓声好吗
And the luckiest prick in Pittsburgh is...
这个匹兹堡最幸运的家伙就是...
Brian Kinney.
布莱恩·肯尼
I don't know. The planets don't seem to be fucking with me.
我看你们说的不对行星似乎没跟我过不去啊
Oh, yeah? How do you plan to go away
是吗你打算怎么同时一边去旅行
and still be at Melanie and Lindsay's wedding?
一边出现在茉蕾妮和琳赛的婚礼上
Oh, no.
不好
Vic?
维克
What's the matter? You okay, uncle Vic?
怎么了你还好吧维克舅舅
See for yourself.
你自己看看
They're reevaluating your disability?
他们要重新评估你的残疾证明
And if they take it away,
如果他们取消给我的残疾福利
there goes my share of our monthly income.
我们每月的收入中我的那份就没了
Well, goddamn it!
妈的
What kind of fucked up universe
这是什么破宇宙啊
would snatch my brother from the jaws of death
把我弟弟从鬼门关里救出来
only to slowly starve both of us out of house and home?
就为了让我们倾家荡产慢慢饿死
Ben says it's got to do with mercury.
本说跟水星有关
Oh, does he?
是吗
Look, don't panic. I can help out.
淡定点我能帮忙分担的
No!
不
Michael, this is a sign.
迈克这是一个征兆
If I lose my benefits, then...
如果我没了福利金那么...
I'll just have to get back to work.
那我只能再回去工作了
Are you sure?
你确定吗
Once upon a time, I was a pretty decent chef.
曾经我是一个还过得去的厨师
Decent?
还过得去
Decent?
过得去而已吗
He was another Sara Lee.
他原本有可能发展成下一个莎莉公♥司♥的
I'll take that as the compliment
我就当你是在夸我吧
That I'm sure was intended.
我相信你是打算夸我的
The trick will be finding somebody willing to hire me.
当务之急是找个愿意雇我的人
Well, there's no shortage of restaurants.
各种餐厅有很多啊
There's also no shortage of chefs.
厨师也很多
I'm rusty as an old skillet.
恐怕我宝刀已老锈迹斑斑
And when they find out why I haven't been working,
要是他们知道我为何这么久都没工作
their souffles will drop.
一定会惊掉下巴
Would you stop talking yourself out of a job before you even get one?
你能不能别还没找到工作就先打退堂鼓
What if I got you a shift at the diner?
我让你在我工作的餐厅打工如何
We could work together.
我们可以一起工作
Come on.
来吧
In selecting your ideal derriere,
要选择你理想的臀部
It's very important that you be happy with your choice,
重要的是你要对你的选择感到满意
Since it'll be following you around for a long, long time.
因为它会陪你很长很长的时间
Right.
好吧
Our catalog will help.
我们的产品宣传册会有助你做选择
Thanks.
谢谢
So many to choose from.
可选的太多了
Pear shape, melon shape.
桃状的瓜状的
Each with its own unique personality.
每种都独具个性
God. How am I ever going to decide?
天呐我该怎么决定呢
Well, sometimes it helps to see them in the flesh.
有时候看看实物会有帮助
My staff have all had work done
我的员工都做了隆臀手术
and they'd be more than willing to show you
他们都很乐意为您展示
our most popular models.
我们最受欢迎的模型
Somebody loves his job.
真是热爱自己的工作啊
Gerald? Tell the boys to come in.
杰拉德让男孩们进来
Yes, doctor.
是医生
Mr. Honeycutt's having difficulty making up his mind.
哈尼卡特先生难以做出选择