摩登家庭
Modern Family S10E10
Part 1
Nov. 25, 2019, 7:19 p.m.
平安夜快乐 艾丽克斯
Merry Christmas Eve, Alex.
他还活着啊
So, he's still alive --
你一定还没跟妈妈说你怀孕的事吧
must mean you haven't told Mom you're pregnant yet.
我们想谨慎处理好这件事
We want to be careful to do it right.
现在你倒知道谨慎了
Now you're being careful?
我没办法再保守秘密了
I can't keep this secret anymore.
看看我
Look at me!
她头发都发白了
Ugh. She's going gray.
我的天 还真是
Oh my God, she is!
我刚才是在惊讶她的丑发型呢
I was just gasping at the haircut.
我现在似乎一有压力就会这样
Apparently, this is what happens when I feel stress now.
好吧 我们一定会在今天告诉他们 好吗
Well, we're telling them today, okay?
这样的话 就算妈妈生气
That way, if Mom freaks,
她也有十天的时间在百慕大冷静下来
she'll have 10 days in Bermuda to calm down.
行啊 那现在就去啊
Okay, then go now!
她不会有比平安夜心情更好的时候了
She's never in a better mood than on Christmas Eve.
等一下 这样告诉她怎么样
Wait, is this a good way to tell her?
我们挂只袜子给"克莱尔外婆"
We hang a stocking for "Grandma Claire,"
然后当她说"我不是外婆"的时候
and when she goes, "I'm not a grandma,"
我们就说 跟海莉和我"滴"宝宝说去吧
we go, "Tell that to Haley and my's baby."
答应我 送孩子去上学 别留家教育
Promise me you won't home school this kid.
妈妈 你在干嘛呢
Hey, Mom. What are you doing?
圣诞贺卡就是一堆废纸
Ugh, Christmas cards are just clutter.
等下等下等下
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
你可不能扔掉小卡舅舅的贺卡
You can't throw away Uncle Cam's card.
你知道他对钢琴上的布局有多敏感
You know how sensitive he gets about his piano placement.
还记得那年他的贺卡
Remember that one year where his card
比我们家老保姆的卡片放得靠后了一点吗
was slightly behind the one from our old babysitter?
我想他用了句迷人的措辞
Mm, I believe he spoke the charming phrase,
"这臭婊♥子♥是谁"
"And who is this whore?"
今年圣诞节在外公家过
Well, Christmas is at Grandpa's this year,
所以小卡不会看到它的
so Cam will never see it.
看看这些滑雪橇的北极熊包装纸
Check out the sledding polar bear paper.
看到它不由自主就会有好心情 对吧
Can't look at that and not be in a good mood, huh?
可不是吗
Yeah.
我讨厌这玩意儿
I am so sick of that stuff.
我为了学校活动跟某孩子订了5卷
I ordered five rolls from some kid for a school drive.
结果他带来了50卷... 他的错
He shows up with fifty -- his fault.
这孩子就哭了起来
Kid bursts into tears.
好像他不会数数是我的错
Like it's on me that he can't count?
-我那时才六岁 妈妈 -行吧
-I was six, Mom. -Mm.
去百慕大就该这样穿
Bermuda just gets it --
正式却不失休闲
formal yet casual.
而且还能看到世界上晒黑最完美的
And home of the most perfectly tanned
大腿下部和膝盖上部区域
lower thigh, upper knee region in the world.
以后在更衣室要找到百慕大同乡就很容易了
Not hard to pick out a Bermudan in a locker room.
别了吧 等一下
No. Oh, hang on.
等等 这不对啊
Wait. Well, this can't be right.
这个行程表上说我们有四个航♥班♥
This itinerary says we're on four flights
和三次中转
with three layovers.
是啊
Oh, yeah, um...
记得我在网上找到那个很棒的机票吗
remember how I found that amazing airline deal online?
记得 可是其中两个中转长达六个小时
Yeah, but two of these layovers are six hours each.
是啊 但第三个只有十二分钟呢
Yes, but the third one's only 12 minutes.
但那是在奥黑尔机场
But it's at O'Hare.
亲爱的 我们得在十二分钟内
Honey, we'll have to sprint
从机场的这头跑到那头
from one end of the airport to the other.
当我们12月27日在百慕大醒来的时候
It'll all be worth it when we wake up on December 27th
一切都是值得的 那里天气预报显示...
in Bermuda, where the forecast predicts...
热雾
hot fog.
我们就不能坐直达班机吗
Can't we just take a direct flight?
不能变更 条款写得很清楚
There's no changes, the terms were very clear.
这是一个新网站促销活动
It was part of a promotion for a new website
那网站叫做机.票网
called Tickets.Plane
对了 我要在附近带人看♥房♥♥
Oh, yeah, I have a showing right down the street.
好的 等一下
Okay. Wait, hang on.
先别急着走
Don't leave. Don't leave.
低等经济舱是什么
What is Economy Minus?
其实应该是升等才对
A plus, actually,
因为这舱里没有人会嫉妒坐不到走道位
since no one's jealous of people with aisle seats,
这基本上是两排创新的十八人长椅
because it's basically two innovative 18-person benches
面对面放着
facing each other.
菲尔
Phil?!
-什么事 -没事
- What? - Nothing.
谁动了小卡的贺卡
Who moved Cam's card?
如果不放在壁炉上小卡会很不开心的
He's gonna be very upset if he's not on the mantel!
我把它放在抽屉里了 等他来再拿出来
I put it in a drawer until he gets here.
上面的闪粉粘得到处都是
That glitter was getting on everything.
我还吸进了一点
I breathed some of that in.
我现在咳出的都是金粉
I cough gold now.
歌♥洛莉亚 你有一个哥伦比亚来的包裹
Gloria, you got a package from Colombia.
看来你们政♥府♥拿回飞机跑道了
Must mean the government took back the airstrip.
那是我亲戚们送的礼物
Those are the gifts from my cousins!
真好看
Beautiful!
在老家我们叫它"毛衣之圣诞[西语]"
Back home we call these sueteres de Navidad.
所以就是圣诞毛衣呗
So...Christmas sweaters.
快穿上 我们来拍张照
Put them on so we can take a picture.
这毛衣真柔软
Wow, these are really soft.
可舒适保暖了
Damn cozy is what they are.
看 他们还送了香蕉叶花环
Oh, look, they also sent a banana leaf wreath.
香蕉蜘蛛
Banana spider!
-什么 -那是什么鬼玩意
- What?! - What is that?!
是一种致命毒蜘蛛 能杀死人的
It's a deadly spider! It will kill you!
我知道致命是什么意思
I know what deadly means!
它去哪了
Well, where'd it go?
我的家居鞋不包脚后跟
I'm wearing backless house slippers!
我觉得它跑到
I think it ran over to the --
它占领圣诞树了
He took the tree!
只有我觉得有点痒吗
Am I the only one who feels kinda itchy?
毛衣有问题
The sweaters.
明处有一只 暗处上百千
Where there's one, there's many!
-快跑 -我们走
- Run! - Let's go!
老天 它占领到遥控器了
Dear God, he's got the remote.
来笑一个
Okay, smile!
这个完了我们能去看看手♥机♥吗
Can we go look at phones after this?
不行 莉莉 圣诞节不能给你手♥机♥当礼物
No, Lily, you are not getting a cell phone for Christmas.
手♥机♥很贵 你还没有证明自己
They're expensive, and you haven't proven yourself
有足够的责任感拥有自己的一部手♥机♥
responsible enough to own one yet.
我够有责任感了 我都到一个陌生的国家
Uh, I was responsible enough to come to a foreign country
和两个陌生人过日子了
and build a life with two strangers.
你想晚点睡觉的时候用过这理由了
Okay, you used that one to get a later bedtime, all right?
卡尔 你是下一个
Oh, Cal, you're next.
我们想给卡尔一个完美圣诞
We want Cal to have a perfect Christmas.
这挺有难度 毕竟他妈妈在监狱
It's tough with his mom being in prison.
另外 他的圣诞季开始得有点糟糕
Plus, his holiday season kind of got off to a rough start.
你知道吗 我们选的所有装饰品里
You know, of all of our wonderful ornament selects,
这俩是我的最爱
these are my fave.
圣诞快乐[M.C]
Merry Christmas!
也是米奇和小卡的首字母缩写
From Mitch and Cam!
♪ 驯鹿屋顶上停下来 ♪
♪ Up on the rooftop, reindeer pause ♪
歌♥名: Up On The Housetop
♪ 圣诞老人蹦下雪橇 ♪
♪ Out jumps good old Santa Claus ♪
♪ 背着玩具爬下烟囱 ♪
♪ Down through the chimney with lots of toys ♪
♪ 带给孩子们圣诞欢乐 ♪
♪ All for the little ones' Christmas joy ♪
♪ 呵呵呵 谁不想来呢 ♪
♪ Ho, ho, ho, who wouldn't go? ♪
♪ 呵呵呵 谁不想来呢 ♪
♪ Ho, ho, ho, who wouldn't go? ♪
♪ 圣诞老人屋顶上 嗒嗒嗒 ♪
♪ Up on the housetop, click, click, click ♪
-他没事 真的没事 -挺好的
- He was fine. Fine! - He was fine.
我们还没唱完三节和一段合唱
We barely got through three verses
就反应过来自己的过失了
and a repeat chorus before we realized our mistake.
-这么"短"时间还下了场暴风雨 -是啊
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