摩登家庭
Modern Family S10E21
Part 2
Nov. 25, 2019, 7:20 p.m.
真是不敢相信 我跟你的孩子
It's so surreal that one of our kids
居然能获得如此高的成就
could do something so amazing.
我也爱你们两个哦
I love you both.
你们俩去拿香槟和鲜花送给艾丽克斯
So, you two, grab champagne and flowers for Alex.
我们...我们去拿雪茄送给杰
We'll, uh -- We'll get some cigars to give to Jay.
行
Yeah.
天啊
Oh, my God.
是斯基普·伍斯南 他炒掉你之后你见过他吗
It's Skip Woosnam. Have you seen him since he fired you?
见过一次 在卖♥♥♥房♥♥会上
Once, at a listing.
我试图假扮成我自己的3D纸板
I tried to pretend I was a 3D cutout of myself
避免跟他说话
to avoid talking to him.
不过今天我倒想跟他聊聊
But you know what? Today I want to talk to him.
我想我要告诉老斯基普
I think I'll let ol' Skip know
我女儿要从加州理工毕业了
I have a daughter graduating from Caltech.
不 亲爱的 我们不是那种
No, honey, we are not the kind of parents
靠炫耀孩子来给自己长脸的家长
who make ourselves look good by bragging about our kids.
那我们为什么要生孩子 克莱尔
Then why did we even have them, Claire?
我们连自鸣得意一下都不行吗
Are we really not gonna crow about it
我们终于有个孩子做了能让我们骄傲的事
when one of our kids finally does something we can be proud of?
我好爱你们两个
I love you both very much.
我不介意做性感的那个
I'm comfortable being the hot one.
这个月又创纪录了
Another record month?
谢谢
Well, thank you!
你是世界上最优秀的管家
You're the greatest butler on Earth.
我得挂了
I gotta run.
-菲尔 -斯基普
- Phil? - Skip!
你这家伙 最近好吗
You son of a gun. How the hell are you?
很好 很好 生意比以往更红火
Great, great. Business is better than ever.
你怎么样
How about you?
你现在买♥♥真的人形立牌了吗
Did you, uh, finally get real cutouts?
我不知道你在说什么
I don't know what you're talking about.
我的立牌都是3D高仿真的
Mine are so realistic and 3D,
你肯定像白♥痴♥一样对着它笑来着
you must have been laughing at one of them like an idiot.
我们购物时撞见彼此真是太巧了
How crazy is it we ran into each other shopping, huh?
对了 你的孩子们还好吗
Say, how are your kids?
都特别好
Terrific. Yeah.
琼刚找到份康泰纳连锁店的工作
June just, uh, took a job at the Container Store.
真厉害 我也有个孩子
Impressive. I have a kid
对太空特别感兴趣
that's interested in space, as well. Yeah.
其实她在考虑去太空总署工作
Considering a job at, uh -- at NASA, actually.
是啊 他看起来很有这方面天赋
Yeah, he, uh, looks like he's got the right stuff.
不 我说的是我女儿
No, I -- it's -- I was talking about my daughter.
爸 你猜怎么着
Oh. Hey, Dad. Dad, guess what.
我一拿起酒瓶双胞胎就开始乱踢
The twins started kicking the second I picked up booze.
绝对是我的孩子 对吧
They're my kids, right?
我的另一个女儿
My other daughter.
那好 我的演讲里
Okay, I'm doing a little thing about
会稍微说说追随梦想
following your dreams in mine.
你的演讲里有吗
Do you have anything like that in yours?
我的是"追随热情"
I say "Follow your passions."
好的 不算重复
Okay, yeah. That's different enough.
好吧
Okay.
那边有点可疑
Something fishy's going on over here.
我去旁敲侧击一下 看看能查出什么
I'm gonna go shake some trees, see what falls.
你今天真精神 副校长塔克
Looking lovely today, Vice Principal Tucker.
别装纯良少年了 佩考斯基
Cut the choirboy act, Pitkowski.
你不喜欢我用这种方式对你说话吗
Oh, you don't like the way I'm talking to you?
你能跟谁投诉去
Well, who are you gonna complain to?
没人
No one!
因为我是代理校长
Because I'm the acting principal,
执掌无上大权
clothed in immense power!
等等 这是什么 休想
Wait, what is -- Nope!
我弯腰速度更快
I bend faster.
"杰·普里契特 猫头鹰杀手"
"Jay Pritchett, Owl Killer"?!
这是什么鬼东西
What the hell is this?
那是1972年
The year was 1972.
我接到了超级大单
I landed a whale --
一艘嘉年华游轮上的所有衣柜
every closet on a Carnival Cruise ship.
为了预算和工期合得上
To make the numbers work,
我需要快速搞到一大批廉价雪松木
I needed a lot of cedar fast and cheap.
结果我砍伐的一片森林
I ended up cutting down a forest
刚好是金斑猫头鹰最后的栖息地
that happened to be the last habitat of the Golden Speckled Owl.
怎么没人提我这一举救下了多少老鼠
You know, nobody talks about all the mice I saved.
没人提
Nope!
只提猫头鹰
Just the owls.
你们在计划抗♥议♥吗
Are you all planning some sort of protest?
在我的监管下 休想
Well, that ain't happening on my watch.
快去坐好
Now go take your seats!
"猫头鹰希♥特♥勒♥"
"Owl Hitler"?!
这照片是怎么回事 我从没勒死过猫头鹰
What the hell is this picture? I never strangled an owl!
让迪兰告诉我他人在哪很过分吗
Is it too much for Dylan to let me know where he is?
我的羊水随时会破
My water could literally break any minute.
我坐在这没问题吧
Am I okay sitting here,
还是说像海洋世界前排一样会被溅湿
or am I in a SeaWorld splash zone situation?
克莱尔 你高中时的死敌艾希莉·沃尔斯
Claire, your old high school nemesis Ashley Walls,
她不是有个女儿吗
did she have a daughter?
我记得没有 怎么了
Uh, I don't think so. Why?
那边那个女人
Well, that woman over there
看起来很像艾希莉 但不太可能
looks just like Ashley, but it can't be.
她看起来只有你一半 美貌
She looks half your... beauty.
艾希莉·沃尔斯
Ashley Walls.
她在每件事上都胜过我
She outdid me at everything.
返校节女王 曲棍球队长
Homecoming Queen, Field Hockey Captain,
我们上大学前的那个夏天
and the summer before we went away to college,
她竟打败我成为了普里契特衣柜的实习生
she beat me out for an internship at Pritchett's closets.
克莱尔
Claire?
让我想想
I...want to say...
艾希莉
Ashley?
-是我 你好吗 -很好
- Yes! how are you? - Good.
艾希莉·沃尔斯-卡内基
Ashley Walls-Carnegie.
菲利普·汉弗莱·邓菲
Phillip Humphrey Dunphy.
你最近在忙什么 艾希莉
So, what have you been up to, Ashley?
我是人身伤害律师
Uh, well, I'm a personal injury lawyer.
我有个兄弟靠这个赚了好多钱
I have a buddy that makes bank from that.
他不是律师
He's not a lawyer.
他专门挑豪车碰瓷
He just tries to get nice cars to hit him.
他只是在开玩笑
Yeah, he's just kidding.
我没开玩笑 妈
No, I'm not, Mom.
-事实上 我 -给 吃块糖
- In fact, I've ac-- - Here, have a candy.
真无礼
That was rude.
我刚刚遇到了以前的健康教育老师
I just ran into my old health teacher,
她说她一直都觉得
and she said she always expected
我会挺着大肚子参加毕业典礼
to see me pregnant at graduation.
恭喜
Congratulations.
谢谢 是双胞胎
Oh, thanks. Twins.
抱歉 要是知道他们老爸现在在哪
Sorry, I'd be a lot happier about it
我会开心得多
if I could track their father down.
吃糖
Candy.
看 是你弟弟米奇
Oh, look -- it's your brother, Mitch.
他总是一板一眼的 对不对
Now, he was always a little uptight, wasn't he?
高中时是的 但现在他特别好...
Well, he was in high school, but now he's just the most --
听好 你今天只有一个任务 小姑娘
Okay, you have one job today, young lady,
支持你大爸
okay, to be supportive.
假如他说了笑话 你就要笑
If your dad makes a joke, you will laugh.
他演讲后你怎么做 鼓掌
If he makes a speech, you will what? Applaud.
好吧 我得去找我的座位了
Right. I-I-I'm gonna go find my seat.
但和你叙旧真开心 克莱尔
But it was great catching up with you, Claire.
提一嘴我们女儿今天要从加州理工毕业
No one would blame you if you mentioned you had a daughter
谁也不会责怪你的
graduating from Caltech today.
亲爱的 错过时机了
Honey, the moment has passed.
摩登家庭
Modern Family
剧集 | 摩登家庭 | 导航列表