神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S04E05

Part 5 Oct. 1, 2020, 3:12 p.m.

and the fact that I still kind of think Terry did this.
我甚至还觉得这一切是Terry做的
Nope, it was all me.
不全是我♥干♥的
Three weeks ago, Captain Holt asked me
三周前 Captain Holt叫我
to order a plaque that read,
订做一个奖牌要写着
"The Ultimate Detective/Genius."
"最强警探/天才"
I did it, and I ordered three copies
我照做了但我还定做了三个复♥制♥品
and a statue of Tyrese riding a dolphin.
和一座Tyrese骑着海豚的雕像
Is that relevant? To my life, yes.
这重要吗对我的人生来说当然重要啊
Once I had the plaques, I manipulated Captain Holt
我拿到奖牌后就开始影响Holt警监
into choosing Boyle as his partner.
选Boyle做他的搭档
All it took was six bottles of dish soap.
这只花了区区六瓶洗洁精
See, this is what happens
看这就是
when Jake tries to wash dishes by himself.
Jake试着自己洗碗的下场
It's like he's helpless without Boyle.
好像他离开Boyle就不能活了
Yes.
对
He is helpless without Boyle.
他离开Boyle就不能活了
And you fell for my trap
你掉进了我的陷阱
like a greedy little rat.
就像一只贪婪的老鼠一样
Easy.
悠着点说(容易)
Yes, it was easy.
对的确很容易
And the next phase of my plan:
我计划的第二步
a "Skating accident."
制♥造♥一起"旱冰意外"
But you knocked out your two front teeth.
但你把两门牙都磕掉了
False teeth.
是假牙
Fake blood.
假血
I lost my real teeth at Jenn Sutton's
我的真牙早在四年级Jenn Sutton的
birthday party in fourth grade.
生日派对上就没了
Oh, you made sure I didn't remember that!
你还确保了我不记得这事儿
It was minute five
当时是我和Todd Cohen的
of seven minutes in heaven with Todd Cohen
天堂七分钟里的第五分钟
when he bumped the wall
他撞到了墙
and a bowling ball fell on my face.
然后一颗保龄球砸在我脸上
Maybe I just wasn't at that party.
可能我根本没去那个派对
Once I had faked the skating mishap,
我假造了旱冰事故后
I swapped out a dummy plaque for the real one.
我就把真的奖牌掉包了
Then I left to go to the dentist.
然后我就去看牙医了
And you convinced your dentist
你说服了你的牙医
to help you carry out the rest of the heist.
帮你完成剩下的争夺赛
No. Of course not. Go ahead.
不当然不是请继续
I came back, wearing the perfect disguise
我折回来换上了完美的伪装
to make sure I was never noticed by anyone.
保证没有一个人会注意到我
Something so drab and uninspiring...
一些乏味而毫无生气的衣服
This feels like it's gonna be a dig on me.
我感觉接下来该损我了
I wore Amy's clothes. There it is.
我穿了Amy的衣服我就知道
This is your doing, you and your male prostitute.
这都是你的锅你和你的男妓
Bill is not a male prostitute, I don't think.
Bill不是男妓我觉得不是
That suit is not drab.
我的套装才没有毫无生气
It has a fun salmon lining.
它的里衬是充满活力的橙红色
No, Amy, it made me invisible.
不 Amy 它让我隐形了
And now that I had that power,
我有了这个能力后
every time one of you stole a plaque,
每次有人偷了奖牌
I replaced it with a fake.
我就换一个假的进去
And no one had any idea
你们丝毫没有发现
until the lights went out,
直到我关了灯
revealing a secret message:
显露出奖牌上的秘密讯息
"Heists are dumb."
"奖牌争夺赛蠢爆了"
Then we raced in here to blame Terry,
然后我们就跑来责问Terry
and you trapped us.
你把我们困住
But how did you know he was gonna say "Heists are dumb"?
但你怎么直到他会说 "奖牌争夺赛蠢爆了"
Terry says that about everything.
Terry说什么都这样讲
Everyone should wear suspenders.
每个人都应该穿背带裤
Belts are dumb.
皮带蠢爆了
People should swim forward.
人们应该向前游泳
The backstroke is dumb.
仰泳蠢爆了
30 grams of fat?
30克脂肪
Hummus is dumb.
鹰嘴豆泥蠢爆了
And now here you all are,
看看你们现在
locked up behind the glass
被锁在玻璃后面
like a bunch of loser fish.
一群我的手下败将
I bet you're wondering why I did it.
你们一定在想我为什么这样做
Because you wanted to win?
因为你想赢
No! I had a loftier goal in mind.
才不是我有更远大的抱负
Can you do me a favor and tell me
能麻烦大家告诉我
what that says right there?
这上面写了什么吗
"The Ultimate Detective/Genius."
"最强警探/天才"
Detective.
警探
Can you imagine what that word sounds like
你能想象不是警探的人听到这个词
to someone who's not a detective?
会有什么感觉吗
Discriminatory.
歧视
It's worse than segregation.
这比种族隔离还要严重
Uhuh. Too far? I'm sorry.
别这样说的太过了吗抱歉
But I think I've proved a point,
但我认为我证明了一个观点
and that's why we're changing the name of the plaque forever!
所以从现在起我们要给这个奖牌一个新的名字
To what?
改成什么
Gina Linetti
Gina Linetti
is the ultimate human/genius.
是最强人类/天才
Thank you.
谢谢大家
And now I'd like to say a few words.
我想说几句话
You talked for, like, an hour
你已经说了大概一个小时了
when you had us locked in that interrogation room.
之前把我们锁在审问室的时候
I'm a fair ruler.
我是一个开明的君主
Your comment has been heard.
你的评论我会听取的
But seriously, you guys,
不过认真的大伙
I just want to say,
我只是想说
I freaking love you losers.
我爱死你们这些失败者了
Happy Halloween.
万圣节快乐
Happy Halloween!
万圣节快乐
Take out your teeth.
取出你的假牙
Yeah!
对
Take out your teeth!
取出你的假牙
Take out your teeth!
取出你的假牙
Take out your teeth!
取出你的假牙
Oh!
噢
I'm invincible!
我是无敌的