无耻家庭

Shameless S02E05

Part 5 Jan. 9, 2020, 10:37 a.m.

Heard you could help me.
听说你能帮我
Just disfigurement, or you want the whole nine yards?
是要毁容破相还是直接搞死搞残
Need an alibi.
要个不在场证明
Figure we say we were camping.
比如说我们在一起露营
You a retard? What? No.
你是个傻逼吗什么不是
Retards say they went camping.
傻逼才会说他们在一起露营
Know where they go next? Prison.
知道他们之后去哪了吗监狱
Where they get ass slammed by other retards.
在那里被别的傻逼狂抽屁股
How you gonna document a camping trip?
你打算怎么证明一次露营旅行
Fucking call a raccoon as your witness?
打电话给浣熊做你证人吗
We were at Fort Wayne. Gun show.
我们在韦恩堡看射击表演
You bought a crossbow. Seller remembers you.
你买把弩弓卖家记得你
Got the receipt: date, time stamped.
拿着收据上面有日期和具体时间
You can get doctored security footage, too.
你还能得到被篡改的监控录像
You're good. How much?
不赖啊多少钱
Fifteen hundred.
1500块
Eighty? This ain't a negotiation, shithead.
800如何不还价白痴
Family discount.
家庭折扣
You ain't fuckin' family.
谁跟你妈逼的是一家人
Our kids are practically hitched.
我们的孩子都勾搭在一起了
Money up front, all of it.
钱财第一一分都不少
Or fuck off.
要么滚蛋
I can get it.
我给你就是了
Then you'll be off the hook.
然后你就会摆脱困境了
Yeah, and this is the weekend place.
度周末的好地方
Feel bad for the bride. Why?
我真为新娘感到难过为什么
She's not going to be the prettiest girl at her own wedding.
她竟不是自己婚礼上最惊艳的那一位
Whose wedding is this?
这是谁的婚礼啊
It's my college roommate. What's he do?
我大学室友他干嘛的
Make rich people richer.
让富人更富
Parks!
帕克斯
Oh, Jesus, Garvin,
天啊加文
what, did Geithner let you escape the Fed for a day
怎么盖瑟纳竟放你从美联储出来玩一天
in the middle of this mess?
现在的形势正一片混乱吧
Had to see Aaron take the plunge for the second time with your own eyes?
就想亲眼见证艾伦第二次跳进婚姻的苦海嘛
Yeah, well, one more and he's caught up with Gingrich.
是啊再多一次他就跟金里奇一样了
Yeah.
确实啊
Who's this?
这是哪位
Uh, Fiona, Greg.
菲奥娜格雷格
Fellow Princeton Tiger.
普林斯顿大学校队老友
Only you would show up with a girl like this
只有你才能携此美眷啊
while the rest of us have to go home to our kids.
剩下的我们只好默默回家带孩子
So when did you graduate?
你什么时候毕业的
Actually, I'm, I'm going to be a senior.
其实我才要升大三
I hate you.
我嫉恨你
I lived in Rockefeller. You?
我以前住洛克菲勒你呢
Off campus.
住校外
What about freshman and sophomore year?
大一大二过得咋样
Rented a house with some friends.
跟一些朋友合租房子住
Hey, we'll catch up at cocktail hour.
我们要去喝点鸡尾酒
Uh, are we early?
我们来早了吧
No. Why?
没啊怎么了
There's not many people.
人不是特别多
Second wedding for both keeping it small,
他们都是二婚低调点好
which means we should, uh, mingle.
意思是我们应该融入其中
I'll need this first.
我先来杯这个
After you.
你先请
I got an alibi.
我有不在场证明
I got an alibi.
我有不在场证明
Hey, I do have I have an alibi.
我真真的有不在场证明
This is the way you treat hardworking Americans?
你们就这样对待勤劳的美国人民吗
If I were brown and hated this country,
要我是棕色人种并且厌恶这个国家
the goddamn ACLU would be all over this place.
那操蛋的美国公民自由联盟早就挤满这地儿了
Look, I didn't kill Eddie.
听着我没杀埃迪
I was in Ohio.
我当时在俄亥俄
You see that detective?
看到那侦探没
The bull dyke? She's the investigating officer.
那个拉拉吗她是调查员
She's put 11 men on death row.
她已经将11个人打入死牢
Detective, I'm innocent; I can prove it.
警探我是无辜的我可以证明
I didn't do anything, I swear.
我什么也没做我发誓
Predatory criminal sexual assault of a child.
虐童性侵犯罪案
years.
判30年 30
I'm gonna go talk to the victim's mother.
我得去跟被害人母亲谈谈
Let's see if she agrees you didn't do anything.
我们看看她是否认同你什么都没做
Fuck.
操
Thank you.
谢了
Okay, bye bye.
好的再见
Crying jag is finally over.
嚎啕大哭总算是结束了
Ugh, our poor sitter.
那可怜的保姆
Emma gets hysterical any time we leave her.
每次我们一离开艾玛就失控
Consider yourself lucky.
你还算幸运的
I took my oldest back to school shopping.
我带着我家长女去返校购物
She insisted I drop her off.
她坚持不让我抱她
Wouldn't be seen with me.
不愿被人看到我们一起
How old? Nine.
几岁了 9岁
Just wait couple years, she'll be borrowing your clothes
等着看吧几年以后她就会借穿你的衣服
and willing her breasts to grow.
希望自己的罩杯变大
Oh, fuck me.
杀了我算了
My little sister's 11.
我妹妹11岁
Tampons and birth control just around the corner.
眼看就要跟卫生棉和避孕套打交道了
Oh, god help us.
神啊救救我们吧
Uh, I need you just for a second.
能过来下吗
Excuse us, ladies.
失陪了女士们
That's for you. Thank you.
给你的谢谢
I saw you drowning in there.
我看你需要解围
Thanks, but your radar's off.
多谢但你弄错了
Oh, really?
真的吗
Well, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to whisk you away from all the fun.
对不起我不是有意扫你的兴
Where are you taking me?
你带我去哪
I want to offer you a tour of the house before the nuptials.
我想在婚礼前带你参观一下房间
I want to show you something cool.
想给你看点好东西
Are we allowed up here?
我们可以上来吗
Well, hey, I know Aaron's dad.
当然我跟艾伦的爸爸认识
He's the white guy.
他是白的那个
Thanks.
多谢指点
Foremost urologist in the country.
美国首席泌尿专家
He's seen every president's dick since Eisenhower.
他看过自艾森豪威尔后每位总统的鸡巴
Who takes a picture with their urologist?
谁会跟自己的泌尿科医生拍照啊
Listen, if a man has your testicles in his grip,
如果有人掌握着你的蛋蛋
you'll do whatever he asks.
你会任他差遣
Little known fact Gerald Ford was hung like a bear.
偷偷告诉你杰拉德·福特鸡巴超大
You're really bad at flirting, you know that?
你真不会调情知道吗
What makes you think I'm trying to flirt?
你怎么会觉得我是想跟你调情呢
Huh, getting me liquored up and alone?
让我大喝特喝跟你孤处一室
Oh, yeah, nothing closes the deal like deceased heads of state.
是啊没有什么比已逝首脑更让人性奋的了
Thought I was under no obligation to sleep with you.
不是说我不必跟你上床嘛
Oh, well, I was kind of hoping that you'd just want to.
我是希望你会想要跟我上床
Who says I don't?
谁说我不想了
Wedding's starting.
婚礼开始了
Hi, Holly.
霍莉
What's with the makeup?
化妆干嘛
I'm sending stronger signals.
我要表现的更明显一点
Did I leave my underwear in your brother's room?
我是不是把内裤留在你哥哥的房间了
It was my lucky pair.
那是我的幸运裤
Didn't see it.
没见着呢
You want to hang out later at the barbecue?
想在烤肉会之后逛逛吗
I'm busy.
我很忙的
Lip'll be there.
利普也会去
He wants to double.
他想找个伴儿
He said that?
他说的吗