摩登家庭

Modern Family S09E14

Part 3 Nov. 26, 2019, 11:02 a.m.

好啦其实好像只是长得像的人
Uh, you know, it just kind of looked like him.
这里有洗手间吗
Is there a bathroom?
帮我拿着我自己去找找
Here, I'm just gonna find it myself.
没什么我没事我很好
No big deal. I'm fine. I'm -- I'm great.
我...
I...
最近有跟新的人交往吗
So, are you seeing anybody new?
没有我今年都没给我妈做情人节卡片呢
No, I didn't even make my mom a Valentine's card this year.
我问你有没有跟人交往
It's alarming that I asked about dating,
而你直接说到你妈这样好吗
and you went right to your mother.
你好
Hello?
艾丽克斯我是费诺曼教授
Alex, it's Professor Fennerman.
很抱歉在情人节打扰你
I'm sorry to bother you on Valentine's.
没事的
Uh, it's okay. Uh...
海莉有联♥系♥你吗
Have you heard from Haley?
她不是跟你在一起吗
Isn't she with you?
本来是啊但她突然就跑掉了
She was, and... then she suddenly ran off.
我想... 我好像让她无聊到
I think -- I think I may have bored her
受不了逃跑了
to the point of fleeing.
你怎么可能会让人无聊呢
You could never bore anyone.
你知道谁才是真无聊吗舍费尔教授
You know who's boring? Professor Schaeffer.
同意他无聊到要死
Agreed. He's insufferable.
总是嘴上叨叨个没完
He never stops droning on.
他就像是宇宙微波背景辐射一样
He's like the cosmic microwave background radiation.
因为他是永远都弄不走的持续噪声
Because he's the constant noise you can't get rid of!
太好了今晚终于有人能懂我说的话了
Thank God somebody gets me tonight.
我觉得或许带她来天文台
You know, I think it might have been a bad idea,
并不是什么好主意
bringing her to the observatory.
或许我应该把目光放在
I probably should have set my sights on someone
跟我更有共同话题的姑娘身上
with whom I have more in common.
你懂我意思吗
Do you know what I mean?
我应该懂吧
I...think I do?
好了我打算再多等一会
Anyway, I think I'll wait here a little longer,
看一会儿星星以防她突然出现
take in the stars, just in case she shows up.
或许她会出现的
Maybe she will.
谢了艾丽克斯
Thanks, Alex.
天啊
Oh, my God.
-怎么了 -海莉弃他而去了
- What? - ?Haley blew him off.
他好像想要我去天文台那里陪他
I think he wants me to come to the observatory to be with him.
你对他有感觉啊
You have feelings for this guy?
谁不会对他有感觉啊
Who wouldn't?!
你知道想找到一个
I mean, do you know how hard it is
有颜值的天才有多难吗
to find a good-looking genius?
除了他就只剩打扮一下后的我了
There's him, and when I put in a little effort, me!
那就去吧
Then go.
我这就去
I will.
你就去吧我也要去
Yeah, you will, a-and I'm gonna make
给我妈做一张情人节卡片
a Valentine for my mom.
这两件事不一样好吗
They're not the same!
好先打开我的
Okay, open -- open mine first.
这个形状是和服
Oh. ?It's -- It's a kimono.
我上了网上的折纸课
I took an online origami class.
好吧
Okay.
是俳句
It's a haiku. ?
"友爱人丈夫
"Friend, lover, husband.
人生从见你开始
My life started when we met.
你是我所有"
You're my everything."
你真的是
Aww. ?You are.
来看看你给我写了什么
Ooh, let's see what you wrote in yours.
是协力脚踏车
Aww. It's a tandem bicycle.
真是有爱
Yeah. ?It's so cute.
"情节快乐
"Happy V-Day.
爱你米"
Love, M."
本以为我的妞够冷血了呢
And I thought my date was cold.
怎么小卡知道我意思[毒]
What? No. Cam knows what I mean.
小卡知道你毒吗
Cam knows you are mean?
你对今晚的菜单流露出的感情
You were more effusive about tonight's menu
都比给我的卡片多
than you were in my card.
"熔岩巧克力蛋糕看起来又骚气又美味"
"The molten chocolate cake looks slutty and delicious."
你也这么说我会死啊
Would it kill you to say that about me?
什么鬼阿曼达有来这里
What the hell? Amanda was here.
你们贴在脸书上的照片
This picture you posted on Facebook --
她就在你们背后她为什么就走了呢
She's right behind you. Why would she just leave?
今晚本该是浪漫的一晚
Tonight was supposed to be a romantic night.
我不想看着他饥渴地撩骚
I don't want to watch Luke make his sweaty moves
他这周的战利品
on his conquest of the week.
有些妹子还真上钩
Yeah, and some of them buy it.
到底是哪的煤气大泄露
Under what gas leak is
让他有这么多无脑女可找
he finding these brain-dead bimbos?
我知道发生了什么
I know what happened.
她走进店里第一次看到我本人
She walked in, saw me for the first time,
觉得我长得很丑
and thought I was hideous.
我最近的发型真是怎么弄都弄不好
I've really been struggling with my hair lately.
别才没有你发型好看死了
No, no, stop it. You have great hair.
席娜·伊斯顿留这发型好看你也能留得好看
If it worked for Sheena Easton, it can work for you.
1959年出生的苏格兰知名女歌♥手
我们互通短♥信♥了这么长时间
We spent all this time texting.
我还以为我们真的心心相印
I thought we had a real connection,
就真的很理解彼此
like, really got each other.
我们不忍♥心任他埋怨自己
We couldn't let him blame himself.
他知道后... 还接受得挺好
But, uh...he took it pretty well.
你们俩阴险贼猫可真损
You catty bitches!
卢克我们爱你但自从你进入青春期
Luke, we love you, but ever since you hit puberty,
-你就有点... 讨人厌 -讨人厌
- you've been... a little disgusting. - A little disgusting.
这还用你们说啊
Don't you think I know that?!
她不就是我扭转乾坤的机会吗
She was my chance to turn it around.
好这样吧打给她
Okay, you know what? Call her.
我们跟她讲讲帮你把整件事解释一下
We'll get on the phone, we'll clear the whole thing up.
我打给她了她不接电♥话♥
I called her. She's not picking up.
我们现在就去她家
We're going to her apartment.
我们惹的祸我们得弥补
We messed this up, we'll fix it.
在蛋糕上之前就走吗
Before the cake arrives?
我一整晚都等着把脸埋进蛋糕里了
I've been wanting to bury my face in that all night long.
你听不到你对它多浪漫吗
How can you not hear this?
好了乔时间晚了
Okay, Joey, it's getting late.
是时候该让你上♥床♥睡觉了
It's time to get you up to bed.
你能帮我看一眼房♥间有没有怪兽吗
Can you do a quick monster check first?
可以没问题
Yes, I can.
菲尔我睡觉不能没有小熊陪
Phil, I can't sleep without my teddy bear,
我把它忘在我小拖车上了
and I left him in my wagon.
你能去帮我拿来吗我怕黑
Can you get him? I'm afraid of the dark.
没问题小兄弟
You got it, buddy.
乔你在干嘛
Joe? What are you doing?
打开门
Open the door.
弗汉希欧·乔瑟夫·普里契特
Fulgencio Joseph Pritchett!
把门打开
Open the door!
年轻人你马上开门让我进来
You let me in right now, young man.
你不能这样乔
Not cool, Joe!
乔这音乐是怎么回事
Joe, what is going on with this music?
我的天啊
My God.
菲尔去哪里了
Oh. Where's Phil?
谁知道那家伙啊
Who knows what that guy?
亲爱的怎么回事
Honey, what happened?
小情圣把我锁外面了
Mini Casanova locked me out.
什么够了
What? That is enough.
乔你就是个小孩
Joe, you are a little boy,
你现在立刻去睡觉
and you're going to bed right now.
你是个烂情人
You're a bad Valentine!
惨了
Oh, no.
感觉就像电影《早餐俱乐部》中
I feel like the rest of the Breakfast Club
其他人发现贾德·尼尔森的角色
when they realized Judd Nelson was
没有他们想象中那么硬气时那样...