摩登家庭

Modern Family S09E12

Part 4 Nov. 26, 2019, 11:02 a.m.

你紧张兮兮就是为了这个吗耳钉
That's what all the fuss is about? An earring?
熊呢
Ugh. Where's the bear?
柜子
Closet.
耳钉只是个开始
I started with an earring.
根本没人注意到
No one even noticed.
所以你可能需要升级
So, you might need to up your game, pal.
可以在脖子上绕个蛇
Try wearing a snake around your neck
然后一有人谈论就表现得你很烦
and then act annoyed when people want to talk about it.
抽屉
Drawers?
我采取了不同的方式
I went a different way.
好吧
Oh! Okay.
首先欢迎来到反叛期
Well, first of all, welcome.
我们这样比较有趣
We do have more fun.
我猜你喜欢这样
I'm guessing you like it,
但你担心其他人的想法
but you're worried what other people will think?
路人甲把我比作网球
A passerby likened me to a tennis ball.
而你不能...
And you can't...
躲在这等着它长长
hide in here until it grows out.
我算过了
I ran the numbers.
即使是衣物都反过来穿
Even with inside-out wearings,
我也只能宅在这里三周
I'd be out of underwear in three weeks.
好吧
Yeah.
我和你讲讲我认识的最开心的家伙
Um, let me tell you about the happiest guy I know.
他在他家前院拉了一个钢索
He stretched a tightrope across his front yard.
从不在意邻居侧目
Didn't worry about the neighbors.
他用弹簧单高跷跳着去上班
He pogo-sticked to work, and...
关键是他不在意别人怎么想
The point is, he doesn't care what anybody thinks,
如果他在意
and if he did,
他就得不到那么多的乐趣
he wouldn't have had half the fun he's had.
我再问你
Let me ask you again.
你感觉这头发怎么样
How do you feel about the hair?
还挺喜欢的
Kinda like it. Yeah.
对于杰会讨厌这头发你有何想法
How do you feel about the fact that Jay's gonna hate it?
我喜欢
I love that.
谢谢了克莱尔
Thanks, Claire.
我得再抱一会儿
Yeah, I'm gonna hold on just a little longer.
我今天超需要拥抱
I need it today. Okay.
橱柜
Oh. Cabinet.
不是吧
Come on.
抱歉打扰一下
I hate to interrupt,
你就大声嚷说会打回给她吧
but if you just scream you'll call her back,
我觉得你会想先去看乔的派对怎么了
you might want to see how Joe's party's going.
很明显乔和他的朋友们分享了
Apparently, Joe shared the uplifting news
大家可能随时死掉的振奋人心消息
that his friends could die at any minute.
我喜欢我的工作
Hey, so, I love what I do,
但我以观众的活力为生
but I feed off the energy of my audience.
如果观众没什么热情
And if I'm not getting a lot back,
我就更难忘记我已经45岁
it's harder for me to forget I'm a 45-year-old
科班出身却穿着连裤♥袜♥
classically trained actor in a body sock
披风除了当道具还得当作车厢窗帘用
and a cape that doubles as a curtain in my van.
所以我先走了
So, I'm gonna go.
杰克逊妈妈来了
Jackson, Mama's here!
你居然对他们说他们都会死
You told them they were all going to die?
不我只对乔说了但说的方式很温和
No, only Joe, but in a very nice way.
真的吗那他们怎么看起来像
Really? Because it looks like the "before" picture
嚼服百忧解之前的对比照片
in an ad for chewable Prozac.
把我们也带走
Take us, too!
乔过来
Joe, come here.
这件事我们得再谈一次
We need to talk again about the thing.
我只想去床上躺着
I think I'm just gonna go to bed.
等等
Hold on.
我们都会在某天死去不假
It's true we all die sometime.
但像你年纪这么小的人
But someone like you, so young,
会活很久很久的
is gonna live a long, long, long time.
是的重点是
Yeah, and the thing is,
知道我们会在某天死去是件好事
knowing we're gonna die some day can be a good thing.
因为这能提醒我们
Because it reminds us to appreciate
珍惜我们活着时的每分每秒
every minute that we're around.
这让你很受打击对吗
It's hitting you hard, isn't it?
我感觉我再也不会笑了
It feels like I'm never going to laugh again.
但这是很自然的
But that's natural.
你面对的是个很成人化的问题
This is a pretty adult thing you're dealing with here.
事实上如果你接下来几天
In fact, I'd be worried about you if you weren't
没有垂头丧气我反而会担心
walking underneath a cloud for a few days.
但最终...
And eventually --
你我卧室
You, me, bedroom.
我拿了红酒我想好好红红火火浪一浪
I got the Syrah and I want to do something Syr-wrong.
你不按♥摩♥了吗
But what about your massage?
我说了不想按了
I said I didn't want it.
快来
Come on.
米奇尔我们能这样我真高兴
Mitchell, I am so happy we're doing this.
我们好久没这样随性过了
We haven't done anything spontaneous in forever.
我希望你对我的选择满意
I hope you like what I picked out for us.
和以往比起来水果味更重些
It is a little fruitier than we're used to.
今天可真波折
What a day, huh?
罗马托加袍看急诊
Togas and health scares...
米奇尔我爱你
Mitchell, I love you,
我不想让凯莱布夹在我们中间
and I don't want Caleb to get between us.
那你们想让我在哪个位置
Oh, so, where do you want me, then?
我的天你在这做什么
Wha-? Oh, my God. W-what are you doing here?
我卡梅隆说你喜欢我
Me? I -- Cameron said that you liked me,
然后你又叫我来卧室等你
and then you said meet you in the bedroom.
你告诉凯莱布我喜欢他吗
You told Caleb that I liked him?
你告诉他来卧室等你吗
You told him to meet you in the bedroom?
我以为是对你说的
I thought I was talking to you.
二位听起来我们三个都需要放纵一下
Guys, it sounds like all three of us could really use this.
别急凯莱布
Take it easy, Caleb.
很快米奇尔就是你的人了
You'll have Mitchell to yourself soon enough.
小卡你命长着呢
Cam, you're not dying!
这我们可不知道
We don't know that I'm not!
我有个表亲就是我这年纪死的
I-I had a cousin that died at my age
死于遗传病
from a genetic condition,
是我妈这边传下来的
and it runs on my mom's side of the family.
如果你有那两种基因就有危险
And if you have those two genes, you're at risk.
所以我今天才神经兮兮的
That's why I've been acting crazy all day.
那就去做个检测
Well, then, take a test
确保你没有那对老妈基因[牛仔裤]
to make sure you don't have that pair of mom genes.
米奇尔我的确去做了检测
Mitchell, I did take the test.
一周前做的
I took it a week ago,
我太害怕了一直不敢看结果
and I've been too scared to look at the results.
亲爱的我真抱歉
Oh, honey, I'm-I'm so sorry
你一直都在独自承受这些
you've been going through this by yourself.
我们一起看结果好不好
Let's look at the results together, okay?
-真的吗 -当然
- Really? - Yeah.
好我要看了
Okay, here goes.
谢天谢地
Oh, thank God.
你没事
You're okay?
不是网购订单发货了
No, my Etsy order shipped.
但好吧这就是结果
But, okay, here's the -- here it is.
-你来看我不敢看 -好好好
- You look. I cannot look at it. - Okay, okay, okay.
是阴性的
It's-it's negative.
-什么 -你没事快看
- What? - You're fine. Look.
-真的吗 -真的
- Is it? ?- Yeah.
我的天我真不敢相信
Oh, my God! I can't believe it!
这可得好好庆祝一下
Oh, now, that is something to celebrate.
-是啊我爱你 -我爱你
- Yeah. I love you. - I love you.
好了伙计们我不傻
All right, guys, I'm not-I'm not dense here.
我知道我该走人了
I-I know this is my cue to leave.
但你们俩的感情
But what you guys have is...
不是人人都有的
it's very special.