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Modern Family S09E04

Part 5 Nov. 26, 2019, 11:01 a.m.

I appreciate the advice, and that should be an easy fix
毕竟我现在有一个"精"力充沛的伴侣
now that I've come into my own with such a virile partner.
天啊
Oh, my God.
够了
Okay, that is enough!
瞧你对这个可怜的男子做了什么
Look what you're doing to this poor man,
让他夹在你们俩之间扭曲变♥态♥的
putting him in the middle of this twisted power struggle
权力斗争中
between the two of you!
这正是你和你♥爸♥整天对我做的事
This is exactly what you and your dad always did to me.
你在说什么啊
What are you talking about?
我第一次见你♥爸♥的时候
The first time I met your dad,
他不认可我你就一直亲我
who did not approve me, you kept kissing me.
还有我们第一次和你家人
Or the first time we went away with your family
去小木屋度假时你故意各种呻♥吟♥
to that cabin and you made all those noises.
我呻♥吟♥不是为了气他
Th-That wasn't about that.
那如今这些呻♥吟♥都到哪儿去了克莱尔
Then where did those noises go, Claire?
我不会束手旁观看着你手撕本
I will not stand here while you tear poor Ben down
就像你♥爸♥当年也手撕了我一样
the way that Jay tore me down,
还有本你是蓝色还是金色
and, Ben, were you blue or gold?
-我必须得知道 -我是蓝色
- I need to know. - I was blue.
我想要来点《阿凡达》的感觉
I wanted to feel like an Avatar.
知名电影剧中部分角色全身蓝色
本是我不对
Ben, I'm sorry.
菲尔跟艾丽克斯说得对
Phil and Alex are right.
你不应该被如此对待
You don't deserve to be treated this way.
谢谢克莱尔其实我...
Thank you, Claire. You know, I --
我还没说完我对你做的事
Not finished. I am doing to you...
就是当年我爸对我与菲尔做的事
...exactly what my father did to me and Phil.
他觉得任何人都配不上他的宝贝女儿...
No one was good enough for his little girl, and...
我想我也觉得没人配得上我的宝贝女儿
And I suppose nobody's good enough for mine.
但亲爱的我也曾站在你这立场
But, honey, I've been where you are right now,
所以我是最不应该
and I'm the last person
给你增添无数磨难的人
who should be making it harder for you.
我真的很对不起
I'm...I'm so sorry.
我不该故意留下性♥爱♥画作给你们看
And I'm sorry I left the sex painting for you to find.
不知道你听完会不会开心点
If it makes you feel any better,
其实画是假的
we faked it.
本吓死了根本无法"表现"
Ben was so freaked out, he couldn't perform.
我听了一点都没开心啊
Doesn't make me feel any better.
但我开心多了
That helps a lot.
《魔法坏女巫》
? 我相信自己已变得比以前更好 ?
? I do believe I have been changed for the better ?
我还是没懂为什么她是绿色的
I still don't understand why she's green.
这首是好女巫与坏女巫对唱的歌♥曲《For Good》
坏女巫小时候喝了魔酒变成绿皮肤
? 因为我认识了你 ?
? Because I knew you ?
? 因为我认识了你 ?
? Because I knew you ?
? 因为我认识了你 ?
? Because I knew you ?
? 让我永远地... ?
? I have been changed ?
她们以前曾关系那么好
They used to be so close.
-你还好吧 -? 改变了自己 ?
- You okay? - ? For good ?
-她们怎么变成这样了 -我不知道啊
- What happened to them? - I don't know.
一个金发碧眼的万人迷一个绿皮肤的"怪物"
从竞争对手变成至交最后却因为立场不同成为敌人
我中间睡着了几分钟
I-I dozed off for a couple of minutes.
不好意思借过一下
Excuse me. Excuse me.
对不起不好意思
I'm sorry. Excuse me.
靠
Damn it.
早知道就该让歌♥洛莉亚来
I should've sent Gloria.
兄弟
Hey, fella.
你这是怎么了
What happened in there?
杰我是个骗子
I'm a fraud, Jay.
我就是个大骗子
I'm a damn fraud.
别这样啦人人都有怪异的哭点
Come on. We all cry at weird stuff.
像我是拳击手打完之后拥抱的那一刻
For me, it's when boxers hug after a fight.
我的重点不是哭
It's not the crying I'm worried about.
其实你说得没错
You were right.
你说过我要是去哥斯达黎加就会倾家荡产
You said I would lose everything if I went to Costa Rica,
你说对了
and I did.
你在说什么鬼
What are you talking about?
你不是什么果汁业大亨吗
I-I-I thought you were a big juice magnate.
谎话都是谎话
Lies! It's all lies, Jay!
我才不是什么果汁大亨
I'm not no juice magnate.
我开了个果汁小摊本来一切顺利
I had a juice stand, and things were okay --
直到后来猴子拿到了我的刀...
until these monkeys got a hold of my knives.
律师说我不能谈这件事
The lawyer says I can't talk about it.
达琳也跟高空滑索的老板好上
Then Darlene takes off with this honcho in zip lines
然后离我而去
and leaves me.
所以我才一直躲着你
That's why I've been avoiding you.
我就是个丢人现眼的废物
I'm a disgusting loser!
你把我当什么人了
Who are you talking to?
在我面前你怕什么丢人
You don't need to be embarrassed.
但你说过"你到时候出事了
But you said, "Don't come crying to me
可别来找我哭我还得收拾烂摊子"
when it all turns to hell and I have to pick up the pieces."
-你说的 -也就是说说而已嘛
- You said that! - ?It's just what you say.
我当然会帮忙你收拾残局啊
Of course I'm gonna pick up the pieces.
不然我还能怎么样
What else would I do?
你是我最好的朋友啊
You're my best friend.
妈的你也是我最好的朋友啊要抱抱
And you're my best friend, damn it. Come on.
因为认识你我变得更好了
I'm better because I knew you.
一辈子当最好的好朋友
Best friends forever.
歌♥洛莉亚说得对我现在懂了
Yeah, Gloria's right. I...I hear it now.
曼尼开门嘛
Manny open the door.
我知道你在房♥里
I know you are in there.
妈你来做什么
Mom, what are you doing here.
我知道你说过你想有自己的空间
I know that you said that you want your space,
但对我来说真的很难熬
but it's so hard on me, ok?
所以我要你每天睡前给我发一封短♥信♥
So, I want a text message at the end of everyday,
跟我报平安
telling me you are ok.
然后每周三次
And three times a week,
发你的自♥拍♥给我
a picture of your face
这样我才能看着你的眼睛
so I can look into your eyes
知道你有没有说谎骗我
and see if you are lying to me.
妈我们昨天早上才互通过短♥信♥
Mother, we texted yesterday morning.
才没有呢上次都多久之前了
No, we didn't. That was days ago.
昨天早上8点37分
Yesterday at 8:37A.M.
你问我收到你寄的爱心包裹了没
You asked if I got your care package,
还让我别告诉杰你给我寄了香肠
and said don't tell Jay I gave you a sausage.
然后你不小心发了语♥音♥消息
Then you accidentally hit voice memo,
我听到你叫斯黛拉找块地去死
and I heard you tell Stella to go in a yard and die.
对不起嘛我好想你
Sorry. I just miss you.
你偶尔来看看我应该也没关系啦
I guess it's not so terrible of you stopping by every now and then.