生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S11E12

Part 3 Oct. 8, 2019, 10:36 a.m.

你在干什么呢
Hey, what you doing? ‭
谢尔顿给我出了道题挺好玩的
Sheldon gave me a brain teaser. It's kind of fun.
一群人共进晚餐
It's about a group of people at dinner,
你得找出让他们不吵架的座位安排
and you have to figure out where they can sit without fighting.
是不是那个草绿先生不可以
Oh, yeah, is this the one where Mr. Green
和吃肉的人坐在一起
can't sit next to anyone eating meat,
浅蓝叔叔
and Uncle Light Blue
身边不能有比他颜色深的人
won't sit next to any of the darker colors?
没错谢尔顿也发给你了吗
Yeah, did Sheldon send it to you?
艾米发的我已经做出来了
Amy did. I solved it already.
-真的吗 -真的
- Really? - ‭Yeah.
就像对待我的陪审团义务传票一样
Same way I solved my jury duty summons,
直接丢了
I threw it away.
不行不行不行
No, no, no, no, no.
橙黄阿姨不可以坐在吧台边
Uh, Aunt Orange can't sit next to the bar
粉红小姐会说
without Ms. Pink saying,
"我滴神呀你酒喝得太多了"
"Jesus thinks you've had enough whiskey."
谢尔顿和艾米也给你们出那道题了吗
Did Sheldon and Amy give you guys that puzzle, too?
是的是我多心还是他们最近变得很怪
Yeah. Is it just me or have they been acting strange?
是一直怪不是才变的
I don't think they're acting.
对啊之前有一天
Yeah, the other day,
谢尔顿叫我带他去火车模型商店
Sheldon made me take him to the train store.
我们都没进去他就说了句
We didn't go inside. He just said,
"做得很好" 我们就回家了
"Nicely done," and then we went home.
是啊艾米给了我这个塑料戒指
Yeah, and Amy gave me this plastic ring
叫我保管好
and told me to hold on to it.
-我也有一只 -一样的
- I got one, too. - Yeah, same.
我也有
Yeah, me, too.
不过被小桂子吞了
But-but Cinnamon ate it.
我明天给能"找回来"
I-I'll get it back tomorrow.
不得不说进行得真顺利啊
I have to say, this is going pretty well.
没错
It is.
如果用人类做试验在道德上是错的
I-If experimenting on humans is morally wrong,
那我不想当个道德正确的人
then I don't want to be morally right.
你们是不是测试我们
Hey, are you testing us
看谁够格当伴郎伴娘
to see who gets to be in your wedding?
-是的 -不是
- Yes. ‭- No.
他们居然在给我们打分
Wha-- they're rating us.
我竟然还是最后一名
And I'm in last?
别慌还有时间
Don't panic, there's still time.
这可是马拉松不是短跑
Look, it's a marathon, not a sprint.
知道吗这太侮辱人了
You know what, this is so insulting.
我都不想当你的伴郎了
I-I don't even want to be your stupid best man.
-没错 -我也不想
- Yeah. ‭- Me neither.
等等等等
W-W-Wait, wait.
好奇问一句有谁解出题了
Just out of curiosity, which one of you figured it out?
我
I did.
真棒
Impressive.
你好斯图尔特
Hello, Stuart.
好啊谢尔顿
Oh, hey, Sheldon.
想喝杯卡布奇诺吗
Can I interest you in a cappuccino?
你何时开始卖♥♥咖啡了
When did you start selling those?
有人落在这儿的不过还是温的
Oh, someone left it here, but it's still warm.
算你四块钱怎么样
Say four bucks?
不用了谢谢
No, thank you.
没出什么事吧
Oh. Everything okay?
这个嘛
Well...
我暗中在我朋友身上做试验
I secretly experimented on my friends,
现在他们都不想当我的伴郎了
and now none of them want to be my best man.
就是些寻常的婚礼破事
So, you know, normal wedding drama.
抱歉
Sorry.
可能得让我那蠢哥哥来做伴郎了
Probably have to use my stupid brother.
准备好他用咯吱窝来说婚礼祝酒词吧
So get ready for a wedding toast delivered by his armpit.
要是你真的不想让你哥当伴郎
Well, if you really don't want to use your brother,
我愿意当
I'd be your best man.
真的吗
Really?
对啊我们是朋友啊
Yeah, we're friends.
再说这也挺好的
Plus, it'd be nice.
我从未被称为"最佳"
Never really been called the best before.
说起来也没被称为"男人"过
Or a man, for that matter.
好吧谢谢你斯图尔特
Okay, well, uh, thank you, Stuart.
谢谢你的好意
That's a very generous offer.
不客气
My pleasure.
据我所知伴郎通常会收到一份礼物
I-I understand the best man usually receives a present.
此话不假
That's true.
开瑞坦[抗过敏药]永远都不嫌多啊
Can never have too much Claritin.
你还在想谢尔顿的那道破题吗
You're still working on Sheldon's dumb brain teaser?
老天啊紫博士是个女人当然了
Oh, my God, Dr. Purple's a woman! Of course!
感觉太爽了
Oh, that feels so good.
大家好
Hello.
我想我该向三位道个歉
I believe I owe the three of you an apology.
毋庸置疑
No argument here.
通过拿你们做试验
By experimenting on you,
我意识到我伤害了你们对我的信任
I realize I've violated your trust
可能也违反了《日内瓦公约》
and possibly the Geneva Convention.
说完了吗
Is that it?
还没有
No.
所以为了不再进一步惹恼你们
So as to not upset any of you further,
我已经邀请了斯图尔特当我的伴郎
I've asked Stuart to be my best man,
他也答应了
and he's agreed.
你们仍然欢迎来参加单身派对
You're all still invited to the bachelor party.
他想在好市多超♥市♥举♥行♥ 主题是"光看不买♥♥"
Uh, he's thinking Costco and the theme is browsing.
你选斯图尔特也不选我们吗
You picked Stuart over one of us?
我本来想选你们其中一个
Well, I wanted to choose one of you,
但你们都离我而去了
but you all turned against me.
选伴郎不是通过计分选出的
Picking a best man isn't about keeping score.
但你们都是我的朋友
But you're all my friends.
如果我不收集数据
I mean, if I didn't collect data,
我又怎么能从你们三人之中选出一个呢
how could I possibly choose among the three of you?
这话还挺暖的
Well, that's actually kind of sweet.
是吗可能我表达得不对
Is it? Perhaps I said it wrong.
这是你的婚礼选你想要的人就行了
Look, this is your wedding, just pick whoever you want.
除了你自己你谁都不必考虑
You don't need to worry about anyone else but yourself.
你也算是为今天训练了一辈子
You've kind of been training for this your whole life.
谢谢你莱纳德
Thank you, Leonard.
如果有帮助的话这两人都是半途而废的主
And if it helps... these two are quitters.
你在煮什么呢
Hey, what you making?
我把芝士调味包给撒了
Uh, well, I spilled the cheese packet,
所以我们今晚吃无料通心粉
so we're having mac and nothing.
我就吃通心粉好了
Yeah. I'll just have the mac.
"无料"会让我放屁
"Nothing" gives me gas.
你心情为什么这么好
Why are you in such a good mood?
我刚跟谢尔顿聊过
Mm, I just talked to Sheldon.
他为试验的事道歉了并邀请我当他的伴郎
He apologized about the tests and asked me to be his best man.
太好了你为他付出了那么多他应该请你的
Uh, great. After all you've done for him, he should've asked you.
艾米是你最好的朋友
And Amy's your best friend.
她肯定会醒悟过来选你的
I'm sure she'll come to her senses and pick you.
她才不是呢我们又不是什么12岁少女
Okay, she's not my best friend. We're not 12.
如果她想选伯纳黛特当她的伴娘
If she wants Bernadette to be her maid of honor,
我真的不在乎
I really don't care.
听起来你挺在乎啊
Sounds like you care.
不我只是觉得不爽
No, I mean, it-it's just annoying.
我们每天都聊天无时无刻不在一起
You know, we talk every day. We see each other all the time.
她总是在我身边陪着我基本上...
She's always there for me, and basically--
天啊艾米真是我最好的朋友
oh, my God, Amy's my best friend.
你还好吧
You okay?
不好我最好的朋友没邀请我当她的伴娘
No, my best friend didn't ask me to be her maid of honor.
老娘气炸了
I'm pissed!
总之你的所为是错误又残酷的
So, bottom line, what you did was wrong and cruel,
而我孩子的妈莫名觉得被打动了
which the mother of my children finds oddly appealing.