《生活大爆♥炸♥》前情提要
Previously on The Big Bang Theory...
你能相信我们的小羊羔终于要嫁人了吗
Can you believe our little lamb is finally getting married?
他肯定不信
He can't believe it.
我也不敢相信
And neither can I.
爸 你还好吗
Hi, Dad. How you doing?
我以"连你都能证婚网"
Then by the power vested in me...
所赋予我的合法权利
by EvenYouCanPerformWeddings.Com...
我现在宣布你们正式结为合法夫妻
...I now pronounce you husband and wife.
你可以吻新娘了
You may kiss the bride.
早安啊 老婆
Good morning, wife.
早安啊 老公
Good morning, husband.
真不敢相信我们真的结婚了
I can't believe we're actually married.
正式完婚了 根据传统
It's official. According to tradition,
我们应该把床单挂在外面
we should hang the bedsheets outside
这样其他村民就能知道我们行房♥了
so the villagers can see that we consummated.
我觉得这有点不太合适吧
I don't think that that's appropriate,
毕竟我们是在这里开始我们的蜜月之旅
considering where we're starting our honeymoon.
你说的有道理
Well, I suppose you're right.
不过如果你仔细想想
Although, when you think about it,
乐高有着形容夫妻房♥事的最完美隐喻呢
Lego is the perfect metaphor for marital congress.
两片乐高"合体"并带有爽度十足的咔哒声
Two pieces that interlock with a satisfying snap.
原来你当时发出的声音是这意思啊
Oh, that's the sound you were making.
我差点就忘了
Oh, I almost forgot.
在你睡觉的时候 我点了客房♥送餐
While you were sleeping, I ordered room service.
真的吗
Really?
请看
Voila!
你本来还以为是食物 对吧
You thought it was going to be food, didn't you?
谢尔顿跟艾米出去度蜜月你们是不是很爽啊
Is it nice having Sheldon and Amy away on their honeymoon?
是啊 因为我跟莱纳德有大把的独处时间
Yeah, because now Leonard and I get all this alone time.
但你俩不能独处啊 我们在呢
But you're not alone. We're here.
是啊 你们在呢...
Yes. Yes, you are.
需要我们先行告退 好让你们夫妇有空聊
Would you like us to leave so you and Leonard can talk about
你们之间有的共同话题吗
all the things you have in common?
哈哈哈 吹牛被抓到了吧
Ha, ha, she called your bluff.
有件很酷的事情跟你们分享
So, something pretty cool happened.
第3频道邀请我去上明晚的新闻
Channel 3 asked me to be on the news tomorrow night
去聊聊即将到来的流星雨
to talk about the meteor shower.
-那很棒啊 -恭喜你啊
- Oh, that's great. - Hey! Congratulations.
尼尔·德格拉斯·泰森也是这么开始火的
You know, that's how Neil deGrasse Tyson got his start.
算是天文科普界的红人 也是海顿天象馆的馆长
他从在海顿天象馆就职
He went from the Hayden Planetarium
到去地方电视台当嘉宾
to guesting on the local news
最后在网上吐槽毁了大家所钟爱的电影
to ruining everyone's favorite movies on the Internet.
导致导演在10周年纪念DVD中修改了星空
现在这机遇轮到我身上了
Now it's happening to me.
或许我该开始列个表
Ooh, I should probably make a list
写下歌♥舞电影《妈妈咪呀2》中的科学不合理处
of all the scientific inaccuracies in Mamma Mia 2.
你确定要在电视直播中承认你看过这个电影吗
You're gonna go on live TV and admit you've seen that movie?
是你老公带我去看的
Hey, your husband's the one who took me.
影后梅丽尔·斯特里普与雪儿 小爷看过咋的
Meryl Streep and Cher? Yeah, I saw it.
听起来像里面有人啊
Sounds like someone's in there.
天啊 有人进去偷谢尔顿与艾米家可怎么办
My God, what if Sheldon and Amy are getting robbed?
还可能更惨 是他们提早回来了
Or worse, what if they're back early?
没回来 他们刚刚发了一张
They're not; they just posted a picture
在自♥由♥女神像前的合影
in front of the Statue of Liberty.
-真的那尊还是乐高 -乐高
- Real or Lego? - Lego.
我们该怎么做 我们谁去看看情况吗
So, what should we do? Should someone go check it out?
我愿意 但我明天得上电视
I would, but I got to be on TV tomorrow.
我得保护好我的生财机器啊
Got to protect the money.
是的 里面绝对有人
Oh, yeah, someone's definitely in there.
好 大伙先进我们的公♥寓♥
Okay, let's go into our apartment.
我们把门锁上 再打给警...
We'll lock the door, we'll call the pol...
有人在里面吗
Hello?! Anyone in there?!
-有事吗 -是福勒先生啊
- Yes? - Oh, uh, Mr. Fowler.
抱歉 我们不知道你在这里
Sorry, we didn't know you were here.
我们还以为是有人偷闯入了他们家里
We-we actually thought someone was breaking in.
而你当时准备好要放倒贼人了
And we were ready to take them down.
艾米请我来给她的植物浇水
Amy asked me to water her plants.
她没养植物
She doesn't have any plants.
好吧 被你抓到我撒谎了
Well, you caught me in a lie.
在下告辞
Have a good day.
刚才很奇怪吧
That was weird, right?
怪吗 我已经失去分辨怪的能力了
Was it? I-I honestly can't tell anymore.
你有看过《妈妈咪呀》第一部吗
Hey, did you even see Mamma Mia 1?
不需要 这续集能自成一部
Didn't need to. The sequel stands on its own.
来
Here you go.
如果两位游览纽约时需要任何事物的推荐
If you need any recommendations while visiting New York,
随时欢迎你们联♥系♥我
please don't hesitate to contact me.
我们正在度蜜月
Well, it is our honeymoon.
所以我们会挺忙的
So we are going to be quite busy.
懂了
Got it.
要去看哈利波特舞台剧 上下两部
Harry Potter play, parts one and two.
而明天我们要去参观
And tomorrow, a tour of the sites
尼古拉·特斯拉居住 工作与慢慢发疯的地方
where Nikola Tesla lived, worked and slowly went crazy.
当然不用说 还有交♥媾♥
And, of course, coitus.
那祝两位享受纽约之旅 以及...享受交♥媾♥
Well, enjoy New York. And, I guess, coitus.
真的假的 谢尔顿
Really, Sheldon?
你想再来一发吗
You want to do it again?
别一副很惊讶的样子好吗
Don't act surprised.
明明白白写在日程表上了
It's clearly marked on the schedule.
我看看
Now,
我们是应该先熨平我们巫师袍上的褶皱
shall we steam the wrinkles out of our wizard robes,
还是做一次激♥情♥并受社会认可的爱
or make vigorous, socially sanctioned love?
任何一种我都能消掉一项待办事物
Either way, I can check something off my to-do list.
社会认... 哇靠 还真的写了
Socially sanc-- Oh, wow. Yeah, there it is right there.
快点 马上轮到拉杰了
Uh, hurry. Raj is on next.
我真不敢相信他们砍了电视剧《吸血鬼日记》
All right. I can't believe they canceled Vampire Diaries
却留着这破烂节目
but they'll show this.
这可是新闻啊
This is the news.
那剧是在说一个女人为两个帅壮吸血鬼左右为难
And that was a woman torn between two hunky vampires.
你的点是什么
What is your point?
拉里 我知道你在里面
Larry? I know you're in there!
是艾米她妈妈吗
Is that Amy's mom?
让我进
Let me in.
让 我 进
Let me in!
不是她妈就是来吃小猪的大坏狼
Either that or the Big Bad Wolf.
拉里
Larry?
福勒太太 你有什么事吗
Mrs. Fowler, are you okay?
我没事 你该担心要出事的是我老公
Oh, I'm okay. It's my husband you should worry about.
我们有替他担心
Oh, we do.
拉里 快开门
Larry, come on.
我觉得他应该不在里面
I don't think he's in there.
他当时来浇过不存在的植物
I mean, he came by to water the imaginary plants,
但后来他就走了
but then he left.
好傻好天真
You are so naive.
金发妹能把你生吞活剥吃干抹净 再吐出来
Blondie here is gonna chew you up and spit you out.
你别告诉他嘛
Well, don't tell him.
快点 你们有备份钥匙 把门打开
Come on, you have an extra key. Open it up.
好吧 但我告诉你
All right, but I'm telling you
他不在里面
he's not in there.
你看 没人吧
There. See?
他绝对在这里
Oh, he's in here.
我能闻到他的斧牌身体芳香喷雾
I can smell his Axe body spray.
他用斧牌身体芳香喷雾呢
He wears Axe body spray.
你高兴了吧 你闻起来像艾米她老爸
You happy? You smell like Amy's dad.
拉里 快跟去看
Larry? Ooh, come on.
我们不应该少管闲事吗
Ah, shouldn't we mind our own business?
有时候真感觉你完全不了解我
Wow, sometimes it's like you don't know me at all.
看到没 他不在这里
See, he's not here.
你可没有我了解他
You don't know him like I do.
老实说 我们对你俩都不了解
To be fair, we don't know either of you.
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