无耻家庭

Shameless S04E08

Part 5 Jan. 8, 2020, 2:43 p.m.

用蛋蛋顶着你的屁♥股♥更有意思了
slap their sacks against your ass cheeks.
该死
Shit!
喂等一下
Hey! Guys!
嗨希拉给我留了一把钥匙
Hi, um, Sheila left me a key.
我很高兴你能来欢迎
I'm so glad you came. Welcome.
我是来给盆栽浇水的
Supposed to water the plants.
为什么门前挂着一个"此房♥出♥售♥"的牌子
Why is there a for sale sign out front?
爸黛比和卡尔来了
Dad, Debbie and Carl are here.
你明天早上能陪我去学校吗
Can you come with me to school tomorrow morning?
那我得取消早晨的单车健身课了怎么了
Have to cancel my morning spin class. What's up?
我因为霸凌同学被停学了
I got suspended for bullying.
必须带家长去学校道歉
Need a parent to come with me to apologize.
道...
Apo--
太过分了
Outrageous.
给我打了麻醉剂
Feed me numbing agents
竟然还要拉我出去
and drag me to the ring.
你这个样子不能去任何地方
You are in no shape to go anywhere.
他必须去不然我就会被开除
He needs to or else I'll get expelled.
我很抱歉卡尔他太虚弱了
I'm so sorry, Carl, but he's too weak.
能借我一件长毛衣吗
Could I borrow a long sweater?
当然了宝贝给
Of course, honey. Here.
谢谢
Thanks.
你还需要别的什么吗
Do you need anything else?
好吧
Oh, okay.
卡尔如果你拿些气球
Carl, if you grab those balloons
绑到前门的出♥售♥牌上
and tie them to the sign out front,
我就让你玩玩我的枪
I'll let you hold my gun.
我月经来了但菲奥娜只有卫生棉条
I got my period, but all Fiona has are tampons
我想保住处♥女♥之身直到我真正变成一个女人
and I'm saving my virginity until I become a woman.
好吧首先
Okay, first of all,
使用卫生棉条不会失去处♥女♥之身
you can't lose your virginity to a tampon.
必须是男人的阴♥茎♥插入才算失身
It has to be a penis with a man attached.
其次你已经是个女人了
And second, you're already a woman.
正式的了
Officially.
从大姨妈叩响你的"大门"那刻起就是了
From the moment aunt flo came knocking at your vagina.
那我男朋友为什么还非要等到我16岁
Then why won't my boyfriend have sex with me
才肯跟我做♥爱♥
until I'm 16?
现在居然还有这样的人
They still make them like that?
你男朋友是好人
You got a good one.
卫生棉是大人用的
Tampons are varsity level,
你还小
and you are still J.V.
给用这些吧
Here, try these.
谢谢
Thanks.
我今晚能在这里过夜吗
Could I stay here tonight?
当然可以了
I love a sleepover.
住下吧
Absolutely.
喂怎么啦
Hey, what's up?
是这样我想把垃圾扔出去
Uh, listen, I'm trying to take the trash out.
你能过来帮帮我吗
Could you come help?
当然还需要其他的吗
Sure. You need anything else?
能给我来一加仑伏特加吗
How about a gallon of vodka?
好我20分钟后到
All right, I'll be there in 20 minutes.
谢了
Thanks.
有乐高积木土豆头先生[玩具总动员]
So we have legos, Mr. Potato head,
恐龙玩具车
dinosaurs, cars.
给他吃奇多玉米片之前
Make sure he eats at least half his pb&j
先让他吃半块以上的花生酱三明治
before you give him his cheetos,
他今天还没拉屎
and he hasn't pooped today,
不过他一般会抓着屁♥股♥吼一声"粑粑炸♥弹♥"
but he'll usually grab his butt and yell "Doody bomb!"
算是给你一点提示
so you'll have fair warning.
还有什么对了
What else-- Oh.
看好他的蜡笔
Keep an eye on his crayons.
他经常会往自己鼻子上乱画
He likes to jam them up his nose.
好的明白了
Okay, got it.
这小孩简直是白马王子
This kid, total dreamboat.
我男人要是有他一半魅力就好了
The men in my life should be half as charming.
包里有创可贴擦屁♥股♥纸
Okay, then we got band-aids, butt wipes--
当然少不了他的玩具猴
Oh, stuffed monkey, of course.
两个弹球两副拼图还有几只河马玩具
Two bouncy balls, two puzzles, very hungry hippos,
这还有体温计和儿童用泰诺止痛药
and then we've got a thermometer and then children's tylenol,
以防万一他发烧什么的
you know, just in case he gets a fever.
好的你要离开多久
Okay, how long are you gonna be gone for?
三个小时不过你知道的
Oh, three hours, but, you know,
就怕万一嘛
you can't be too careful.
你真是个好人
You're a really good person.
不我要是个好人的话
No, if I were a really good person,
就会退学待在家里全职照顾他
then I would quit school and I'd stay home full time.
那样也没什么好处的
Well, who does that help?
也对
Right. Um...
我2点就回来了
Okay, so I'll be back at 2:00.
应该没问题吧
Is that still cool?
别忘了今天晚上宿舍有ABC派对
Don't forget about the abc party tonight at the dorm.
-什么 -你知道的
- What's that? - Oh, you know.
"除了衣服什么可以"
"Anything but clothes."
胶带警告带垃圾袋床单
Duct tape, caution tape, trash bags, bedsheets.
好吧我明天有个文学论文要交
Okay, well, I got a lit paper due tomorrow,
不过派对听起来很有趣
but that sounds fun.
给你谢谢你这么帮我
Here you go. And thank you so much for doing all this.
真的我不知道该怎么报答你
You know, I wish I could think of a way to repay you.
我相信你会想到的
I'm sure you'll think of something.
-久等了 -你来了
- Hey. Hi. - Hey.
我11点半要去实验室
So, uh, I got a lab at half-past,
所以大概只有20分钟
so I only got, like, 20 minutes.
没事我很快的
That's okay. I'm quick.
好吧还有就是
Right, and also
我最近生活一团糟
I'm kind of going through some shit,
所以可能不想...
so I'm not really looking for anything too, uh--
兄弟我很冷也很饥渴别墨迹了
Dude, I'm cold, I'm horny, let's do this.
行是去你的洗衣间还是我的
Okay. Uh, so your laundry room or mine?
上下动起来
Up and down, come on!
燃烧所有脂肪
Let's burn the fat.
屁♥股♥甩起来
Swing that booty!
跟着芭菲健身
With Figure Eight fitness,
我减掉了9.5公斤
I lost a total 21 pounds.
我的腰部瘦了19厘米
I've lost 7 1/2 inches around my waist
减掉了24公斤
and 53 pounds.
我减了6.8公斤...
I've lost 15--
你♥他♥妈♥来这里干什么
The fuck are you doing here?
给你带了点小礼物
I brought you a little gift.
甜甜圈我排了好长的队才买♥♥到
Cronuts. I stood online 40 minutes for those.
-还只能买♥♥两个 -你想干什么
- Only let me have two. - What do you want?
想先吃点点心
A trendy hybrid pastry for starts.
麦克跟我说了
Mike told me.
关于可♥卡♥因♥ 孩子坐牢的事
Right, the coke, the kid, jail.
我无法想象你现在有多难受
I can't imagine what you're going through.
我他妈被困在这个房♥子里了
I'm stuck in this fucking house.
我刚刚把卡尔的T恤按颜色整理好
I just organized Carl's t-shirts in color order.
简直快疯了
I'm going mental.
我都走不到人行道警报就响了
Can't even make it to the sidewalk without bells going off.
我...
I, uh--
会不会有警♥察♥来找我
So should I be expecting a knock on my door?
为什么
What for?
可♥卡♥因♥是我的
It was my coke.
你就是为这个来的
That's why you're here,
想看看我是不是把你供给了警方
to see if I ratted you out to the police.
-同时也想看看你... -操♥你♥妈♥
- And to check on you-- - Fuck you.
-到底有没有 -没有你个混♥蛋♥
- Yes or no-- - No, asshole.
供出来就好了
I should have.
要是把你卖♥♥了还能早点出来
They would have let me off easier.
是吗那你为什么没说
Well, yeah, why didn't you?