无耻家庭
Shameless S04E02
Part 3
Jan. 8, 2020, 2:41 p.m.
好啦 我要把他丢出去了
All right, I'm gonna take him outside,
然后再回家睡一觉
and then I'm gonna go home and take a nap.
有点不舒服
I'm not feeling so good.
-你怎么了 -还不是孩子闹的
- What's wrong? - The baby,
再加上吸入了斯坦的骨灰 更难受了
and I'm sure inhaling Stan's dna didn't help.
这酒吧来的真及时
Hey, good timing, you getting this bar
马上要有两个孩子了对吧
when you're about to have two babies, huh?
可不是吗 现在我终于能负担得起
Yeah, no shit, now I can afford
卡罗天天念叨的那些乱七八糟的母婴用品了
all that ridiculous maternity crap carol keeps bitching about.
小维也终于可以不再为钱操心了
And V can stop worrying about money.
当然啦
Damn straight.
孩子他爸会照顾好我的
My baby daddy can take care of me!
还有你的孩子和你♥妈♥的♥孩子
And your baby and your mama's baby.
我们真是个前卫的家庭 宝贝
We're a regular modern family, baby.
-我爱你 -我也爱你
- I love you. - I love you.
你好 小维
Hey, V.
拜拜 小维
Bye, V.
凯特 猜猜你的新老板是谁
Guess who's your new boss, Kate.
她说什么呢
What she talking about?
现在我怎么说你就得怎么做
You gotta do everything I say now.
斯坦把酒吧留给我了
Stan gave me the bar.
你怎么会想要它
Why would you want it?
没看最近的账目吗
Have you looked at the books lately?
痒死了
So itchy.
擦
Fuck.
弗兰克
Hey, Frank.
你从儿科医生那里弄到什么好货没有
Did you get me anything from the pediatrician?
没 菲奥娜不让我拿
No, Fiona wouldn't let me.
老天呐
Christ.
但我想到一个办法 可以在上数学课时
But I figured a way to rub one out at my desk
悄悄在下面撸一管 而不会被人发现
in the middle of math class without anyone noticing.
儿子你最赞
That's real good, son.
坐后排的好处 对吧
Benefits of sitting in the back, right?
没错
Yeah.
什么味道
What's that smell?
是我
Me.
-什么 -我的肝终于要不行了
- What? - My liver's finally giving up.
要我去杂货店帮你偷一个回来吗
Want me to steal you one from the grocery store?
没那么简单
Not that easy.
-我的肝正在在体内腐烂 -你怎么知道
-Mine is rotting inside my body. - How do you know?
看到我胸口上蜘蛛网状的血管了吗
You see these spider veins on my chest?
我的眼睛估计也充血了吧
And my eyes are-- are probably bloodshot, right?
再看看这个
Look at this.
好恶 巨粗的脚脖子
Ew, cankles.
像个裹着破布的水肿少年曲棍球手
Like a teenage lacrosse player on the rag, retaining water.
那我们该怎么办
What do we do?
没办法 除非有人愿意捐肝给我
Nothing we can do unless somebody wants to give me their liver.
谁会愿意
Who?
死人
A dead guy.
处理掉
Get rid of it.
不不不 不是
No, no, no, no.
倒掉 就像刚才那罐尿一样
Out the window with the gatorade pee.
反正早晚也会变成那个
Gonna wind up there anyway.
我只是省去它中间变化的过程罢了
I'm just cutting out the middleman.
别再弄酒了 我要药 什么都行
No more alcohol, just drugs, whatever you can get me.
我去弄吗
Me?
一个垂死之人凭自己的意志是戒不了酒的
A dying man can't be expected to wean himself off booze by himself.
你想要什么药
What do you want?
随便什么都行 大♥麻♥ 止痛片
Whatever you can get. Pot, percocet--
-吗♥啡♥ -安定
- Morphine? - Valium.
-镇静剂 -维柯丁
- Ativan? - Vicodin.
非那根
Sizzurp?
我一直都想试试那个
I always wanted to try that.
包在我身上
I'm on it.
你是我的骄傲 儿子
I'm proud of you, son.
我不会让你失望的 老爸
Won't let you down, dad.
我的天
O.M.G.
我可以把我的孩子打扮成粉色的羊羔
I can dress my baby like a pink lamb.
我最好生的是女孩
I better have a girl and not a stupid boy.
不 你该去把它打掉
No, you better abort that thing.
-太晚啦 -人流永远不嫌晚
- Too late. - Never too late.
马蒂邀请我晚些时候去他家
Matty invited me over to his apartment later.
-他爸妈在家吗 -他没说
- His parents gonna be home? - Didn't say.
那肯定不在了 这也代表他想嘿♥咻♥了
Bet they're not, which means he'll want to do it.
最好带上避孕套
Here, better bring a condom.
我总是忘记
I always forget to do that.
如果他是个有风度的男生 钱包里会有套套
If he's a classy guy, he'll have a condom in his wallet.
没错
Totes.
看 我还能把孩子打扮成艺妓呢
Look, I can dress my baby like a geisha girl.
我觉得 我还没做好破处的准备
I'm not sure I'm ready to have sex.
当下就是最完美的时刻
Right now is the perfect time.
还没开始来月经 就不会怀孕
If you don't bleed, then you can't breed.
月经到底什么时候才会来
When am I gonna get my period?
唐娜·多蒂都来了 她才九岁
Donna Doty got hers, and she's nine.
我听说唐娜连狗的鸡♥巴♥都舔
I heard donna Doty blows dogs.
这上面说有些女人到25岁才来月经
It says here some women don't menstruate till they're 25
原因是饮用水中含有化学成分
due to the chemicals in our water.
那也太爽了吧 如果卵巢被感染了的话
That'd be sweet-- if your ovaries are polluted,
可以不戴套套操到一把年纪呢
then you can screw without protection till you're old.
可是我们才刚认识
But we're just getting to know each other.
我都还没告诉他我的年龄
I haven't even told him how old I am yet.
别告诉他
Don't.
他如果发现你才十三岁 一定会甩了你
He'll dump you if he finds out you're 13.
嘴巴闭紧 装得好像十六岁一样
Keep your mouth shut, and act like you're 16.
-怎么装 -多舔舔嘴唇
- How? - Lick your lips a lot.
他会认为你想给他吹♥箫♥
He'll think you're gonna blow him.
-你给他吹过吗 -我觉得没有
- Have you yet? - I-I don't think so.
很好 等等
Good. Wait.
先让他给你买♥♥些东西
Make him buy you something first.
比如什么
Like what?
我也不知道 衣服 首饰 iPad什么的
I don't know, clothes, jewelry, an ipad.
一些市区服装店的衣服
Something from urban outfitters.
好吧 好吧
Okay. Okay.
你总是关在厕所里撸 真恶心
You're always in there. It's disgusting.
你看什么看 傻♥逼♥
What are you looking at, fucktard?
只是为我待会儿的意淫取材而已
Just making a mental image for my spank bank later.
0.2英里之后请左转
Turn left in 2/10 of a mile.
你开车上路没问题吧
Hey, you get in the car and on the road okay?
一切都好 这车还有暖气呢
Yeah, all good. This thing has heat.
你没告诉我我每天还有免费午餐呢
And you didn't tell me I get a meal per diem.
生活还能比这更美好吗
How could life get any better?
我很高兴你过得开心
I'm glad you're enjoying it.
你介意我带上男友帽 暂时转变成男友角色吗
You mind if I put my boyfriend hat on for just a second?
只要身上没穿别的就行
As long as you're not wearing anything else.
什么都没有
Nope.
一♥丝♥不♥挂♥地站在装载区
Just standing here on the loading dock totally naked.
不 其实我是想接着聊完早上的话题
No, I wanted to finish our conversation from this morning, actually.
下双陆棋时我把你杀得落花流水的事吗
About me kicking your ass in backgammon?
关于你说昨晚会给我打电♥话♥的事
Oh, about you saying you were gonna call last night.
天呐 真的假的
Oh, my god. Really?
听着 没接到你的电♥话♥ 让我很担心
Look, I worried about you when I didn't hear from you.
你可以打给我啊
You could've called me.
是的 但那不是重点
Yeah, but that's not the point.
那重点是什么
What is the point?
就是你说过 你会打给我
That you said you were gonna call.
前方500英尺就是您的目的地
You will reach your destination in 500 feet.
我得停车了 快到体育馆了
I gotta go. I'm almost at the arena.
好吧 去搞定他们
Okay, cool. Yeah, go get 'em.
我们可以晚些时候再谈
Uh, we can finish this later.
嘿 你也是来上辅♥导♥课的吗
Hey, you, uh-you here for the tutoring?
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Shameless
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