无耻家庭

Shameless S06E06

Part 3 Jan. 7, 2020, 11:55 a.m.

and here is something for your spouse,
还要你的保险公♥司♥提供这几份文件
and a little something from your insurance company--
等等配偶
Wait, spouse?
不好意思我以为你结婚了
I'm sorry, I thought-- I thought you were married.
我结了算是吧什么文件
I am, sort of. What document?
需要他和你共同签署这份按揭文件
He's just co-signing the mortgage there.
除非房♥子不是共有财产
Uh, unless the house won't be jointly owned?
不是共有财产我们分居了
Oh, it won't. We're separated.
那这里有份文件
Oh, well, then here is a document
声明他没有房♥子的所有权
declaring he has no claim to the house,
需要有公♥证♥人在上面签字
and it needs to be notarized there.
我睡了多久
How long was I out?
几个小时
Couple hours.
这些天真不在状态
Not myself these days.
真漂亮
Hey! Oh, that's wonderful.
是黛比帮你一块做的吗
Did Debbie help you with that?
我以前经常和我的小♥弟♥弟♥
I used to make these things all the time
利亚姆做这些
with my little brother Liam.
我很擅长做手工实际上我也很爱这个
I'm good with crafts. I--I love it, actually.
真的吗
Really?
你爱做手工
You love it?
是的
I do.
你的产前检查怎么样
How was your prenatal check-up?
性别写在这里头
Uh, the gender's inside.
我还没打开看
I haven't opened it yet.
是吗
Really?
你知道你该怎么做吗
You know what you should do?
你该开个"性别揭晓"派对
You should have a gender reveal party.
那是什么
What's that?
你把结果交给糕点师
Uh, you would give this to a baker
让他帮你烘焙一个里面撒有粉色
and ask him to make you a cake with either pink
或蓝色糖霜的蛋糕
or blue frosting on the inside,
你邀请朋友家人共聚一堂
and then you invite people over, gather around,
再切蛋糕
cut into the cake,
就能看到惊喜了
and surprise!
真棒
Oh, that's so cool.
我们可以就在这儿办
We could do it here.
你可以邀请你的家人
You can invite your family.
我很乐意认识他们
I'd love to meet them.
你在干什么做手工吗
What is this, arts and crafts hour?
胶水和通心粉呢
Where's the Elmer's and macaroni?
我赶走了那些嬉皮士好招揽老顾客回来
Getting my old customers back by keeping the hipsters away.
他们好像是自己不来了吧
Aren't they kind of staying away on their own?
我就是想向我的老顾客
Yeah, well, I'm trying to show my regulars
表忠心
that we're loyal to them,
我们不会为了城里那些爱留小胡子的家伙改变
and we won't change for all the mustache wax in the city.
因为你们已经变了
'Cause you already did,
你们会一如既往只要他们仍愿意花十美金
and you'd've kept doing it if they were still paying ten bucks
喝一杯低热量啤酒
for diet beer.
那种感觉真好
That was nice.
在我的国家人们常说
In my country, we have saying:
"远离胡须茂盛的男人"
"Stay away from men with excessive facial hair."
真这么说吗
Is that true?
假的你个蠢货
No, you dumb fuck.
我说的每句话都是放屁
Everything I say is bullshit,
但你们还是信我就因为我有俄♥国♥口音
but you believe me because I have accent
而且从来不笑
and I never smile.
好了从现在起凡是持有
Okay, from now on, free well drinks for anyone
水电停供通知电子福利卡驱逐警告
who comes in with a utility shutoff, an EBT card,
或者失业证明者都可获得免费优质饮品
an eviction notice, or an unemployment stub.
互相转告一下
Pass that shit on.
绅士们
Gentlemen,
和绅士旁边的人告诉我
and gentleman-adjacent, riddle me this:
一个女人怎么会昨天已临近死亡之门
how is it that a woman can be on death's door one day
第二天又如夏日雏菊般健康了呢
and healthy as a summer daisy the next?
我来告诉你们
I'll tell you.
就因为像我这样的纳税人为昂贵的癌症药物
Because taxpayers like me subsidize massively overpriced cancer drugs
补贴了大量资金都够医生们给老婆换张脸
so that doctors can buy their wives new faces.
或治好病人避免他们早亡
Or treat patients and stave off premature death.
谁让你说话了
Who asked you?
来杯我常喝的啤酒
Beerkeep, my daily.
大家伙儿重大喜讯
Hey, everyone! An announcement!
我可爱的小闺女肚子里有了宝宝
My winsome young progeny here is with sperm!
我就要头一回当外公了
Gonna be a grandfather for the first time.
你擦桌子
You, wipe tables.
-你喂小孩 -知道了
- You, feed baby. - Okay.
我还以为恰奇是你的第一个外孙
I thought Chuckie was your first grandkid.
那个弱智肥球绝不可能是加拉格家的孩子
There's no way that retarded donut is a Gallagher.
八成是从福利店的垃圾桶里捡来的
Probably found him in the discard bin at the Goodwill.
弗兰克我觉得艾丽卡的事你说对了
Frank, I-I think you were right about Erica.
确实开始奇怪了
Things are getting weird.
她握着我的手真的好久
She was holding my hand for, like, a really long time,
还这样盯着我看
and staring at me like this.
小黛你该面对事实了你就是个
Debs, it's time to face the fact that you are a sweet,
温柔朴素命中注定
earthy hunk of Irish sod, meant to be shared
被男女通吃的女孩
by flesh farmers of all persuasions.
你说什么呢
What are you talking about?
艾丽卡的病情缓解了
Erica is in remission.
什么她不是要死了吗
What? She was dying.
现在又不会死了
Well, now she's not.
我没透露这个消息是不想影响你的计划
I'm withholding the news so that you can step up your game,
但你要加快速度
but you better do it quick
因为她很快就会知道了
'cause she's gonna find out soon.
我什么计划
Step up what game?
艾丽卡好起来之后他们肯定不需要保姆了
There's no way they're gonna keep a nanny if Erica's healthy.
你得想个别的办法留下
You got to find another way in.
她已经喜欢上你了
She already thinks you're a babe.
很容易进一步发展
Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
但我喜欢的是男生啊
But I like boys.
那你想不想让孩子在一个温暖的家里长大
Don't you want to raise your baby in a cozy home?
当然想但是
Of course, but--
那就向她示好
Then throw her a bone.
玩点手上的把戏亲密接触一下啊之类
Uh, little finger bang here, nipple tweak there.
我又不会
I don't know how!
又不是让你真做下去
You don't have to go downtown right away.
慢慢发展嘛
You can work up to it.
否则冬日来临你就只能
Otherwise, come winter, you're gonna find yourself
抱着孩子向路边的雪人
begging for pocket change from a roadside snowbank
讨饭了
with an infant in your lap.
教子有方啊各位
A lesson in parenting, gentlemen.
谁知道呢说不定你还会喜欢呢
Who knows, you might like it.
没有什么能比被一个好女人爱上
There's nothing like the love of a good woman
更让人幸福的了
to make someone feel special.
天哪我真怀念那种幸福
My God, I miss that.
上周你还要我和泰勒上♥床♥
Last week you wanted me to bang Tyler,
这周又换他妻子了
now his wife.
我不是那样的人弗兰克
I'm not that person, Frank.
我会自己想个不牵扯性的办法
I'll find my own way in without sex.
我会成为他们家的一员
I'll, um, I'll become like a family member.
最容易得到一个女人的心的办法就是性
Quickest way to a woman's heart is through her la-la,
但如果你的方法真能成那算你厉害
but if your way works, more power to you.
好了大家觉得怎么样
All right, what do you guys think?
生人勿进
你的纹身多了个T
You spelled "Tattoo" With four Ts.
-纹身身 -干的漂亮小凯
- Ta-t-tattoo! - Terrific job, Kev!
开门阿曼达
Open up, Amanda.
我都听到你的声音了
Look, I can hear you.
告诉委员会你犯了个错
Look, just tell the board you made a mistake.
说你纯粹是出于嫉妒无意
Say you're a jealous cunt and you didn't mean
害她陷入麻烦
to get her in trouble.
什么委员会
What board?