无耻家庭

Shameless S06E05

Part 3 Jan. 7, 2020, 11:54 a.m.

我竭尽全力向韦克斯勒先生证明
I've been busting my ass trying to prove to Mr. Wexler
我会是个好妻子
that I'd be a great wife,
可他就是不喜欢我
and he just doesn't want me there.
因为你不像个好妻子
That's because you're not being a great wife,
你只是像个好保姆
you're being a great nanny.
没人想上仙女玛莉
Nobody wants to fuck Mary Poppins.
《欢乐满人间》里的保姆
那我要怎么办
What am I supposed to do?
满足他的需要所有需要
See to his needs. All his needs.
我试过勾引他
But I've tried sexy before.
但是不管用
It's never worked,
而且还是在我脚肿之前
and that was before I had cankles.
胡说你简直光彩照人
Nonsense. You're glowing.
记住我妈妈说的 "有洞走天下"
And remember what my mother said: "A hole's a hole."
男人才不管这洞长谁身上
A guy doesn't really care who's attached to it.
像奶奶的风格
Sounds like Grammy.
况且你觉得被放疗一整天
Besides, you think after a day of radiation,
她还能起得来吗
cancer girl's getting on her knees?
她几个月没让他爽过了
She hasn't given it up for months.
你握下她老公的手估计他都能射出来
The husband would probably blow his wad if you shake his hand.
那堵墙怎么回事
What happened to the wall?
少管闲事
Mind your own business.
你身上臭死了
You smell like a toilet.
滚开兔崽子
Beat it, brat!
妈妈
Mom!
那个老婆快死了的人什么时候到家
What time's the soon-to-be widower get home?
傍晚
Late afternoon.
好的他家人不在时你好好伺候他
Okay, when the family's away, you take care of your man.
我保证过不了多久他就会让你住进客房♥
I guarantee you, he'll move you into the guest room in no time.
那韦克斯勒太太呢
But what about Mrs. Wexler?
-她现在在哪 -医院
- Where is she now? - Hospital.
好的我保证她回不了家
All right, I'll make sure she's not home
妨碍你们的好事
to cock block you.
过来
Here.
这样
There.
好了
There you go.
这才像话
That a girl.
你好啊美女
Hey, what's up, girl?
新自行车怎么样
How's that new bike handle?
-很稳当不像你 -得了吧
- Smooth, unlike you. - Please.
你骑车的乐趣可不仅于此
That's not the only thing you'd enjoy riding.
你脑子被门夹了吗
Do you have a straight-up brain injury?
靠这锁好帅
Damn, nice lock.
是美国宇航局设计的吗
Did NASA design that?
氪石锁
Kryptonite KryptoLok.
该走了
Hey, yo, it's on.
-她要见我们 -好
- She's meeting us. - Tight.
别羡慕
Hey, don't get too jealous.
房♥产经纪人
Real estate agent.
你们找房♥产经纪人干什么
What do you need a real estate agent for?
我和尼克要找个地方自己住
Me and Nick getting our own crib.
什么时候不想跟老爸一起住了
When you get tired of crashing with daddy,
就给我打个电♥话♥
you should give me a ring.
我会为梦中情人保留空间的
I always got room for my number one boo thang.
我们到了进来吧孩子们
We're here! Come on in, boys.
快进来
Come on.
直接告诉我哪个是我们的
Just tell me which one is ours
好让我把他扔电视机前
so I can stick him in front of the TV.
上帝多赐予了我们几个难民
Well, the good Lord gave us a few more refugees than we expected.
那是上帝的问题
Well, that's the good Lord's problem.
我相信他能解决的
I'm sure he'll figure something out,
毕竟他那么有本事小凯
him being all powerful and shit--Kev!
我自己带三个
Girl, I'm taking in three myself.
不要瞎逼逼了拿出你的基♥督♥徒怜悯心来
Stop bitching and show some Christian charity.
我这儿看起来像有额外的五张床吗
Does it look like I have an extra five beds?
床
Beds?
他们住在丛林里靠吃昆虫和树皮为生
They've been living in the jungle off of insects and tree bark.
他们能有房♥子住有罐头肉吃
They'll be happy with a roof over their head
就满足了
and a can of Spam.
凯文·鲍尔给我滚下来
Kevin Ball, get your ass down here!
好了没事了
Okay, come on.
他们是谁
Who are they?
该死的难民儿童
Damn refugee kids.
我以为你说他们来自迈阿密
I thought you said they were from Miami.
-缅♥甸♥ -缅什么
- Myanmar. - Myan-what?
在亚洲
It's in Asia.
亚洲的国家也太多了
You know, there's too many damn countries in Asia.
应该搞成一个国家
Should just make it one country.
没关系孩子们
Oh, it--it's okay, boys.
只是车而已
It--it's just a car.
没关系
It's okay.
声音大点动作快点
Loud sounds spook them,
都会吓到他们所以要慢慢来
and quick movement too, so go slow.
他们是童子军还是什么
Were they altar boys or something?
他们不嗜血他们是被逼着打仗的
They weren't fondled, they were forced to fight.
内战
Civil war.
你能想象吗刚学会走路
Can you imagine, handed a gun and made to kill
就被迫拿上枪杀人
practically just out of diapers?
谢天谢地我们救他们于水火
Oh, thank goodness we got them out.
我同意接收的可不是
I didn't sign up for
一米多点有创伤后应激障碍的雇佣兵
four-foot mercenaries with PTSD.
我妈想把这个烂摊子扔给我们
Mama trying to dump the whole litter on us.
-这个主意不错 -凯文
- That's a great idea. - Kevin.
我可以一次性把欠下的报应给抵消了
I can get all my karma points out at once.
千万不要
Oh, hell no.
给我一根
Let me get one of those.
我不记得发短♥信♥包括在你的工作职责之内
I don't recall texting being one of the requirements of your job.
我告诉员工我得去办公室
I told the staff I had to come to the office
做些计算
to run the numbers.
那是什么意思
What does that mean?
不知道但听起来很有经理范儿
No idea. It sounded managerial.
我不想让他们看到我处理私人事务
I didn't want them to see me doing personal stuff.
我是你的老板
I'm your boss.
你做这种事不应该也避着我吗
Aren't you supposed to try to keep that shit from me too?
我们能付得起的房♥子都不能住人
All the houses at our price point are, like, condemned.
我以前怎么没意识到自己住的是豪♥宅♥
I didn't realize what a palace I lived in.
我们什么时候去接威尔
What time are we picking Will up?
我觉得你手头上的事情已经够多了
Oh, I think you got enough on your plate already.
不不这对我来说很重要
No, no, it's important to me.
你有什么安排
What have you got planned for him?
我考虑的是先去玩卡丁车然后去打激光枪
I was thinking go-karts and then laser tag,
也许可以去个游乐场
and maybe hit an arcade?
是不是太多了
Is that too much?
我只能陪他几天
I only have him with me a few days.
我觉得自己得把这几天变成他最开心的日子
I feel like I have to make this the best time he's ever had.
只要威尔和你在一起他都会很开心的
As long as he's with you, Will's gonna have a blast.
好吧
There you go.
但你要能凑点钱带他去六旗
But if you can scrape together enough for Six Flags,
六旗世界上最大的主题公园连锁品牌
他可能会直接跟你说他爱你
he might just tell you he loves you.
买♥♥儿子的爱一向在我的考虑范围内
Buying his love is not beneath me.
-小黛怎么了 -菲奥娜警♥察♥来了
- Hey Debs, what's up? - Fiona, the sheriffs are here.
-他们要把我们赶出去 -什么
- They're kicking us out! - What?
他们把东西都扔到街上了
They're putting everything on the street!
我♥操♥ 马上来
Shit. I'm on my way.
那不是你的
Hey! That's not yours!
起来
Hey! Get off that!
那是我们的东西
That's our stuff!
我♥操♥
What the fuck?
请给前台回电
Please call the front desk.
斯泰特曼医生请给前台回电
Dr. Stateman, please call the front desk.