外星居民（2021）

Resident Alien S02E03

Part 5 Feb. 22, 2022, 11:53 a.m.

什么
What?
- 谁是布兰登·陶特 - 哦
- Who's Brandon Touter? - Oh.
他是新的科学老师
He's the new science teacher.
他人其实很好
He's actually a really nice guy.
他赚的是你的两倍
Well, he makes twice what you do.
混♥蛋♥
Prick.
搞什么你不是律师吗
What? Weren't you a lawyer?
我可是法学博士搞什么
I have a JD/PhD. What the...?
是谁管着这个预算的
Who the hell is in charge of this budget?
我知道是谁
I know who.
他就住在我的房♥子里
He lives in my goddamn house.
♪致所有让我神伤的混♥蛋♥♪
For all the ones who bum me out
♪黑名单♪
Shit list
♪那些让我的脑袋充满疑惑的人♪
For all the ones who fill my head with doubt
♪黑名单♪
Shit list
♪那些激怒我的无聊老顽固♪
For all the squares who get me pissed
♪黑名单♪
Shit list
♪你们统统都上了我的黑名单♪
You've made my shit list
♪黑名单♪
Shit list
绑匪
Kidnappers!
哦不不不是的
Oh, no. Oh, no. Nope.
醒醒
Wake up.
本在做噩梦的不是你是我们
You're not having a nightmare, Ben. We are.
你知道什么是噩梦吗
You know what's a nightmare?
工资只有一美元的七十六美分
Getting paid 76 cents on the dollar.
什么
What?
没错镇上男女员工的收入差距
Yeah, there is a blatant pay gap
可非常明目张胆
between the male and female employees of this town.
什么不作为市长我只是对预算签字
What? No, a-a-as mayor, I only sign off on budgets
作为市长你必须改变这一切
A-a-as mayor, you need to fix this!
嗯嗯
Mm-hmm.
这公然的性别歧视让我感到恶心
Yeah, the blatant sexism makes me sick.
- 没错 - 恶心
- Yeah, damn right. - Sick.
- 哦宝 - 真的很恶心
- Oh, honey. - It's really gross.
- 我都反胃了 - 不不
- Sick to my stomach. - No, no.
- 哦 - 天哪不是吧
- Oh. - Oh, God, no.
你是我最好的朋友
You're my best friend.
- 是 - 我爱你
- That's right. - I love you.
- 你看见了吗 - 要来了
- You see that? - It's coming up.
好痛
It hurts.
哈利
Harry.
我带了咖啡
I brought coffee.
我们需要讨论一下广播的事定个计划
We're gonna need to make a plan about that radio...
哦天哪
Oh, God!
不是吧别告诉我你和哈利勾搭上了
No! Don't tell me you hooked up with Harry.
行我不说
Okay, I will not.
等等
Wait.
- 哈利 - 嗨阿斯塔
- Harry? - Hi, Asta.
哦天
Oh, God! Shit!
你得跟我去一趟墨西哥
You have to come with me to New Mexico,
不过首先你能教教我怎么上厕所吗
but, first, can you teach me how to pee?
索科鲁新墨西哥州
她一路上都没眨过眼睛
She hasn't blinked the entire trip.
这不对劲哈利
Oh, this is wrong, Harry.
哦
Ooh.
不对劲而且非常奇怪
Ah! Wrong and super weird.
让我变成她可是你的主意
It was your idea for me to become her.
不不不不别赖到我头上
No, no, no, no, no, do not put this on me.
我不可能让你在没经过人家同意的情况下
I would never tell you to take over a woman's body
占据一个女人的身体
without her consent.
昨天晚上她想让我用下♥体♥占有她
She wanted me to take over her body last night
但我没这么做
with my penis, but I did not do that.
哦天哪不是吧
Oh, God, no.
这可不仅仅是身体这么简单好吗
It's not just about her body, okay?
我们入侵了她的整个生活
It's a whole life we're invading.
应该能有更好的方式的
There has to be a better way.
能及时接触到微型卫星网络
To access a microsatellite network in time
告诉我的同胞们不要来这里
to tell my people not to come here
然后像高温车里的蜡笔一样把你们融化吗
and melt you all like crayons in a hot car?
我能等
I'll wait.
可恶
Shit.
可恶（拉屎）
Shit. Shit.
- 在这里吗 - 不不是哈利
- Right here? - No, no, Harry.
我们先把这里解决了
Let's just get this over with.
那是你昨晚穿的衣服
That's what you were wearing last night,
所以你去实验室之前必须换身衣服
so you have to go change before you get to the lab.
这具身体很臃肿
This body is quite stout.
快去
Hurry.
好吧
Fine.
这根本说不通啊
This doesn't make any sense.
这里说太空飞行之后血浆睾酮
This says plasma levels
和三碘甲状腺原氨酸水平
of testosterone and triiodothyronine
会有所降低
were diminished after space flight,
但好像你的睾酮水平
but it seems like your testosterone levels
反而越来越高了
are getting higher.
我错过了什么
What am I missing?
我是说你有没有觉得加速了
I mean, do you feel like it's accelerating?
干嘛像这样看着我
Why are you looking at me like that?
你好啊美女
Hello, pretty lady.
哦不
Oh, no!
现在是这样了吗
So is this it now?
你随时都可以变成
You're just gonna change into different people
其他人的样子
whenever you want?
一般来说
Under normal circumstances,
很难经常这么做
it is too difficult to do often,
但我飞船上的能量球让这事
but the energy balls from my ship
变得很轻松
make it effortless,
他们对衣服里的有机物质也有效
and they work on the organic matter in clothing as well.
不过我的胸罩尺寸好像不对
Except I think it got my bra size wrong.
吊带都勒出勒痕了
The wire leaves dents in my skin.
等你系上皮带再说吧
Yeah, well, wait until you put on a thong.
哦好
Oh, yes.
这么晚还在加班啊亲爱的卡琳
Working late, Carlyn, my darlin'?
我就想带点
- I'm just trying to...
腌制的猪肉片回家
bring home the salt-cured pork slices.
晚安
Good night.
怎么不多留一会儿
Why don't you stick around for a bit?
♪我以为你完全想明白了♪
I think you got it all figured out
♪但其实你毫无头绪♪
But you ain't got a clue
啊啊啊啊啊
Aah!
♪我何时才能说出适可而止♪
When's gonna be the time I say enough is enough?
♪我不是谁的走狗♪
I ain't nobody's sucker
♪没人能挡我的路♪
Nobody's gonna stand in my way
你确定她不会感到任何不同吗
Are you sure she's not gonna feel any different?
我是说她会以为过去一天
I mean, what does she think happened to her
发生了什么
in the last 24 hours?
她会记得她准备在
She will remember going to sleep
斯♥诺♥弗雷克市长家睡觉早上开车回去
at Mayor Snowflake's house, driving home in the morning,
然后再沙发上愉快地小憩了一番
and then having a pleasant nap on the couch.
是大憩
Long nap.
她喜欢大憩
She likes long naps.
可比醒来面对真实生活好多了
And it is better than being awake for her real life.
她的老板人很差
Her boss is a bad man.
是的她之前说过
Yeah, she said something about that.
呃她老板再也不会来骚扰她了
Mm. He will not bother her again.
你做了什么
What did you do?
你要是拥有相当于六只大猩猩的力量
The same thing you would have done...
你也会做的事
if you had the strength of six gorillas.
我很高兴从她身体里出来了
I am glad to be out of her body.
人们对待她就像休息室的酸奶
People treated it like break-room yogurt.
即使她的名字还在上面