外星居民（2021）

Resident Alien S02E08

Part 3 March 22, 2022, 9:16 a.m.

but he's just doing that to trick him
把他拐去当镇医
into being town doctor again.
这是个很大的秘密
It's this big secret.
是我告诉所有人了
Yeah. I told everyone.
镇医
Town doctor?
伊森医生怎么了
What happened to Dr. Ethan?
黑衣人来了以后他就离开小镇了
He left town the night the Men in Black were here.
是你告诉黑衣人
You mean the night you told the Men in Black
伊森医生就是外星人的那晚吗
Dr. Ethan was the alien?
就是那天晚上
Yeah, that night.
我猜伊森医生就是不喜欢这里吧
Guess Dr. Ethan just didn't like it here.
- 你的脑子在你的屁♥股♥里吗 - 我希望不是
- Is your brain in your butt? - I hope not.
你没意识到发生了什么吗
Don't you realize what happened?
黑衣人带走了伊森医生
The Men in Black took Dr. Ethan.
一旦他们发现他就是人类
As soon as they figure out he's human,
他们会知道外星人还在佩西恩斯
they'll know the alien is still in Patience
然后立马回来找他
and come back looking for him.
我们必须立马去那个派对警告阿斯塔
We have to go to that party and warn Asta.
怎么去我们有看护哎
How? We have a babysitter.
我们让她睡觉
We'll get her to fall asleep.
我知道怎么做
I know what to do.
就像上次我阿扎德姑妈上次过来的时候那样
Same way my Aunt Azadeh conks out when she visits.
- 安♥眠♥药♥ - 不是
- Sleeping pills? - No...
大自然催眠视频
calm-voiced nature videos.
这些腌黄瓜你打算怎么办
What you gonna do with all them pickles?
他们不是腌黄瓜
Those are not pickles.
他们是甜黄瓜
Those are sweet gherkins,
或者叫青瓜仔
or cornichons.
你刚刚是在纠正我怎么说腌黄瓜吗
Did you just correct me on how to say a pickle?
没有我就是说说
No. I'm just sayin'.
我要喝点潘趣酒
I'm gonna get some punch.
- 潘趣酒怎么样 - 它掉了
- Hey, how's the punch? - It fell.
什么意思
What?
什么
What?
什么什么
What?
啥
What?
哦不
Oh, no.
我没
I didn't...
真漂亮啊
It's pretty?
真不错
Yeah, it's amazing.
你以前和哈利约会的时候
I used to spend a lot of time here
我经常在这呆很久
when you were dating Harry.
我可没说是约会
Oh, yeah. I wouldn't call it dating.
就是顺便溜一圈
It was really more of a drive-by.
有什么好消息吗
So any exciting news?
我还没测
No, I haven't taken the test yet.
如果我测了是阳性
If I take the test and it's positive,
那我就怀孕了
then I'm pregnant.
但不是这样的啊
Yeah, that's not how it works.
我刚刚和哈利聊到纽约
You know, I was just talking to Harry about New York.
我的脑子里只有住在那里
All I could think about was how exciting it would be
得有多爽啊你懂吗
to live there, you know?
艺术展剧院所有的一切
The art shows, the theatre, all of it.
为什么我的生活不能是这样
Why can't that be my life?
不知道为什么不能呢
I don't know. Why can't it?
因为我被困在这里
Because I'm stuck here,
像野犬一样生孩子
pushing out babies like a stray dog.
那种有好多乳♥头♥的吗
The ones with all the nipples?
- 好多乳♥头♥ - 超大超大的乳♥头♥
- So many nipples. - Huge, huge nipples.
我收养过一只翻过来乳♥头♥
You adopt one, it turns over. Nipple.
来吧
Come on.
我们去验孕吧
Let's go pee on a stick.
屏住呼吸
Hold your breath.
丽芙刚刚拿出来一盘新蛋
Liv just brought out a new tray of eggs.
公麋鹿的鹿角有多大
The size of the bull elk's antlers
取决于它能晒到多少阳光
depends on how much sunlight the elk gets.
这只麋鹿正沐浴在阳光下
Here, this elk basks in the warm rays of the midday sun.
正常体型的雄性鹿角每天可以长二点五厘米
A full-sized male's antlers can grow up to an inch per day
在夏天短短的几个月里
during the summer months.
他们通常在八月中旬完全长大
They're typically fully grown by mid-August.
如果他可以
If he is able to...
嘿
Hey!
你们去哪
Where are you going?
- 骑车 - 倒垃圾
- Bike ride? - Taking out the garbage!
在你们父母回来之前回来
Just come home before your parents get back.
不许嗑药
No drugs!
- 她可真是个不合格的看护 - 是啊
- She's a horrible babysitter. - Yeah.
什么鬼
What the hell?
- 哈利 - 只有我
- Harry? - No, just me.
- 我在这尿尿 - 抱歉
- Just me in here peein'. - Sorry.
我拿不住验孕棒我的手抖得很厉害
God, I can't hold the stick. My hand's shaking too much.
给我我来拿我来拿
Okay, give it to me. I'll hold it. I'll hold it.
- 你确定吗 - 确定
- You sure? - Yeah.
到位了尿吧
Okay, it's in position. Go.
你尿到我手上了
And you just pissed on my hand.
你在这啊你在干嘛
There you are. What are you doing?
我在吃我的生日糖果
I am enjoying my birthday candy.
你去看蛋了吗
Have you checked on the egg?
因为如果那个蛋孵化了
'Cause if there's any chance that it will hatch,
我们必须得让所有人离开这个派对
we have to get everyone out of this party right now.
派对不能结束派要来了
The party cannot end. There is pie coming.
别担心宝宝不会出来的
Do not worry. The baby will not hatch.
它绝对还在蛋壳里
It is definitely still inside of its shell.
不在其他地方
Nowhere else!
但是这还是个派对
Okay. It's still a party, though,
所以你不能就躲在卧室里
so you can't just hide in the bedroom,
大家会起疑的
or people will be suspicious.
出去和人聊聊
Come talk to someone,
不要做奇奇怪怪的事情
and don't be weird.
行吧
And here we go.
我去和丹聊天因为他有食物
I will talk to Dan because he has food.
这不奇怪
And that is not weird.
嗨丹
Hi, Dan.
这是我付给这顿饭的钱
Here is some money for my meal,
我拿着这些炸物去桌子吃
and I'll also take a side of fries at the table.
抱歉
Really sorry about that.
别担心
Don't worry.
我之前也被尿过
I've been peed on before.
我也是
I have too.
我还挺喜欢的
I kind of like it.
我是说我小时候捡的青蛙
I was talking about a frog I picked up when I was a kid.
青蛙啊
Yeah, frogs.
我也是
Me too.
时间到了
Time's up.
操
Shit.
恭喜
Congratulations.
你会告诉本这个好消息吗
You gonna tell Ben the good news?
除非我确定这是个好消息
Not until I'm convinced it's good news.
为什么如果你觉得很有负担
Why? If you get overwhelmed,
回想一下生活很简单的时候
just think back on a time when life was simple,
你就只是一个尿在
and you were just a woman
另一个女人身上的女人
pissin' on another woman.
你可以的霍桑
You got this, Hawthorne.
你不会相信
You're not gonna believe it.
几个月以前尤金娜·普朗克特
Eugena Plunkett came in, saying she saw a UFO
说她在佩西恩斯看见了一架不明飞行物
a couple of months ago in Patience.
- 你能想象吗 - 那有点离谱
- Can you imagine? - That seems... crazy.
还记得我们小时候去露营的时候
Remember that camping trip when we were kids,
本看到了什么他跑过来然后你们都
like when Ben saw something, and he ran, and everyone
跟着他去凑热闹而我留在篝火旁边
followed him, and I stayed back by the fire?
没错我记得