摩登家庭
Modern Family S03E14
Part 4
Dec. 3, 2019, 11:50 a.m.
Yeah, he's good.
-他非常犀利 -我忘拿包了
- He's sharp. - I forgot my bag.
你每次都这样
You do that every time.
没错
Yep.
我从来都不放过任何细节
I don't miss much.
抱歉 你是想看书吗
Oh, I'm sorry. Were you trying to read?
你想看也看不懂啊
You're the one who tries to read.
擦 你妹的 姐还没那么笨呢
Oh, my gosh! I am not that stupid!
说真的 海莉 你以为你是
Seriously, Haley, you think you
-有史以来最酷的人啊 -你能不能
- are the coolest person ever! - Would you please stop
别只要看见我♥干♥点啥就立马损我
just judging me and everything that I do?
"看看姐 姐好拽啊"
"Look at me! I'm so cool!"
够了 够了
Enough! Enough!
我真是受够你们每天在一起掐架了
I am so sick of you two fighting all the time!
你是个坏大姐
You're a bad big sister,
而你也不是什么好二姐
And you're a bad little sister!
反正都是我的坏姐姐
And you're both bad big sisters to me.
正常点吧
Be normaler.
我还没见过他这么发飙呢
I've never seen him like that.
我们确实有点忽视他的感受了
Well, we do kind of neglect him.
仔细想想吧
And if you think about it,
他有点像是 我们的小妹妹
he is kind of... our little sister.
还记得以前我们怎么打扮他的吗
Remember how we used to dress him up?
我想她
I miss her.
我听见你们了
I hear you,
而且我很不喜欢这对话的发展方向
and I don't like where this is going!
你负责拿口红
You get the lipstick,
我去拿胸罩和网球
I'll get the bra and tennis balls.
贝蒂·卢克
Betty Luke!
[经典卡♥通♥形象Betty Boop--贝蒂娃娃
欲知笑点 务必查证图片]
我会把这房♥子烧了的
I will burn this house down!
乳酪磨碎机哪去了
Where is the cheese grater?
那切菜板呢
Where is the cutting board?
你想让它在哪
Where would you want it to be?
是 就在乳酪磨碎机的旁边
Yes, right here next to the cheese grater.
我知道光看表面看不出来
I know it's hard to tell by looking at me,
但我真不是做主妇的料
But I am not a natural homemaker.
所以小卡对我的厨房♥整顿之后
So when Cam came and organized my kitchen,
我觉得失去了安全感 备受打击
I felt insecure and lashed out.
从某方面来说 我不比
In a way, I'm no better
曼尼那不可理喻的朋友丹妮尔好多少
than Manny's crazy friend Danielle.
拜托 我们能专心做菜吗
Please, can we just focus on the cooking?
爸爸 我们忘记给你这个了
Daddy, we forgot to give you this.
和我们的外套是一个系列哦
It's like our jackets.
我很喜欢
I love it.
我想我一直都对莉莉
I guess I've always been a little sensitive
没有妈妈的事情很敏感
about Lily not having a mother,
而歌♥洛莉亚很好地担当了这个角色
and Gloria's so good at it.
我有些吃醋
I got jealous.
也许我应该跟曼尼讲讲这个故事
Maybe I should tell Manny this story.
也许对他和那个灾星丹妮尔的事情有些帮助
It might help him with that train wreck Danielle.
你知道吗 何不重新打开音乐
You know what? Why don't you turn that music back on.
听起来很不错
Was kind of nice.
爸爸
Hey, dad...
你什么都不用说
No need to talk about it.
我突袭你们的商谈确实有点过分
I was out of line coming down there,
此类事情绝不会再发生了 酒在吧台上
won't happen again. Scotch is at the bar.
不 我想了很多
No, I've been giving this a lot of thought.
你大概又要拉着我谈心了
I guess we're gonna talk about it.
我对你太无礼了
I was rude to you.
我想我只是有点恼火那些调侃律师的玩笑
I think I was just annoyed by all the lawyer jokes.
坦白一点讲 你对我的工作
I mean, let's be honest, you don't exactly
并不引以为豪
beam with pride over what I do for a living.
常言道 讽刺是最真挚的奉承
Mockery is the sincerest form of flattery.
我很确信 常言中可没那个说法
Pretty sure that's-- that's not the saying,
不过 曼尼给我讲了一个
But, um, you know, Manny told me a story
关于他朋友丹妮尔的故事
about his friend Danielle.
顺便说一句 听上去她是个了不起的人物
She sounds like a real piece of work, by the way.
但是 那个故事让我意识到
But, uh, it made me realize that
我太把自己当回事了
I take myself a little too seriously.
听着 不用说我也一直都为你自豪
Listen, it goes without saying I've always been proud of you,
也一直到处吹嘘你
and I brag about you all the time.
所以如果我说 "律师用什么来避孕"
So if I say, "What do lawyers use as birth control?"
答案通常是"他们令人讨厌的性格"
And the answer is, "Their personalities,"
你要知道我不是指你
I want you to know I'm not referring to you.
因为你压根儿不需要避孕
You don't need any birth control.
你好
Hello?
是的 我是杰·普里契特
Yeah, this is Jay Pritchett.
什么 什么时候
What? When?
发生什么了
What happened?
是警♥察♥ 我的车被偷了
It's the police. My car got stolen.
是的 2012 灰色
Yeah, 2012. Gray.
不 不是蓝灰色 更像是淡
No, not pewter. More like a light...
像是 不 不是暗蓝色
Like a--no, not slate.
我都不知道"雾灰色"是个什么色
I don't even know what "Coastal fog" Is.
写"灰色"就行了
Just put down "Gray."
奇洛吗
Kilo?
那不是我的车
It's not my car.
对 她是哥伦比亚人
Yes, she's columbian.
和这个有什么关系 不 我现在下去
What does that have to do with--no, I'm coming down there.
等等 带上钥匙
Hang on. Grab your keys.
我想我需要个律师
I think I might need a lawyer.
猜猜整盅电♥话♥整到谁了
Guess who just got his bell rung?
完全骗到他了
That's good.
真有两下子
That's good.
来吧 请坐
Here we go. Have a seat.
我有一瓶1♥8♥9♥9年的波尔图葡萄酒
I got a bottle of port from 1♥8♥9♥9.
好吧 其实是18.99美金的葡萄酒
Okay, I got it for $18.99...
不过是瓶好酒
but it's a good one.
-今晚很棒 晚餐也很棒 -对吗 是的 而且
- Fun night, right? Great dinner? - Yes. Yes, and...
泰德是个大好人
Tad is... great,
我知道我之前有些难为你
and I know I was giving you a hard time...
但我觉得我应该说声对不起
But I feel like I should say that I am sorry.
克莱尔 你不用解释
Hey, hey, hey, Claire, you don't need to explain.
你肯道歉已经让我受宠若惊了
Your apology is apology enough.
在哥斯达黎加的那个故事
Oh, I forgot the best part
我忘记讲最棒的部分了
of the Costa Rica story.
我们回家后 它们占据了客厅
So we get home, and they've taken over the living room,
占据了厨房♥
they've taken over the kitchen,
食物上 床上 到处都有它们的身影
I mean, they're in the food, they're on the bed.
终于 向迪亚戈抱怨了两年后
And finally, after two years of complaining to Diego about this,
他终于停止了 他说
he finally stops and says,
"好吧 现在我亲眼看到了
"Okay, now I see it.
你确实遇上猴群作乱了"
You do have a monkey problem."
猴群作乱
A monkey problem!
知道 他第一次说我就听清了
Yeah, I heard him the first time.
你可以亲吻我的妻子 可以和她滚床单
You can kiss my wife, you can take her to bed,
但是你不能逗她笑
but you cannot make her laugh.
我要重来一遍
I wanna go back.
你可以亲吻我的妻子
You can kiss my wife,
但只有我能和她滚床单和逗她笑
But only I can take her to bed and make her laugh.
我要再来一遍
I wanna go back.
只有我可以和我的妻子滚床单
Only I can take my wife to bed,
逗号♥
comma,
和逗她笑
and make her laugh.
它们真的无处不在
I mean, they're in everything.
它们唯一没有碰的东西
The only thing they didn't touch--
居然是香蕉
the bananas.
猴子爱香蕉
The monkeys love bananas!
天下哪有不爱香蕉的猴子
You would think they would love the bananas.
对 我们该走了
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