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Modern Family S03E07

Part 2 Dec. 3, 2019, 11:18 a.m.

谢谢很高兴认识你
Thank you. Nice to meet you.
-我也是拜拜 -拜
- You, too. Bye! - Bye!
哦也承让承让
Wham, bam, thank you, Cam.
太假了你搞到她电♥话♥了
Seriously? You got her number?
当然记得把我的衬衫熨一下
Sure did. and all my shirts get ironed,
接缝要熨得笔直哦
And their seams should appear straight,
要比直男主人还直哦
Just like their owner.
不该用钉子吧该用螺丝不是吗
Should you be using screws instead of nails?
美国就是钉子建造起来的孩子
America was built with nails, son.
你国♥庆♥节派对上造的露台也是用的钉子
So was that gazebo you built for our 4th of July party.
跟你说你会喜欢上这个树屋的
I'm telling you, you are gonna love this bad boy.
你知道什么东西爬不上来吗
You know what can't climb trees?
浣熊嘛
Raccoons?
是烦恼
Worries.
浣熊会爬树也迟早会爬上来的
Raccoons can and will get up here,
所以不要在这里留吃的
so don't leave any food,
要不它们就会为保护地盘而攻击你
or they'll get territorial and attack.
你确定这是个好主意吗
Are you sure this is a good idea?
开玩笑
Are you kidding me?
将来你和你的小伙伴们会在这儿玩得很开心的
You're gonna have so much fun hanging out up here with your buddies.
相信我等你长大了一切都会不同了
Trust me, when you get older, it all changes.
-为什么 -生活所迫
- Why? - Well, life gets in the way.
我是不是说了"老婆所迫"
Did I just say "Wife gets in the way"?
有时候我会说错
'cause sometimes I do that.
没有没说错
Nope, you're good.
你还有很多朋友
And you have lots of friends.
是啊我有工作上的朋友
Yeah, I have work friends,
我和你妈还有夫妻档朋友
And your mom and I have couples friends,
还有我大学朋友
And there are my college friends,
但是他们各奔前程了
But they're scattered all over the country.
不像以前对着
It's not the same as just shouting out
邻居朋友吼一声
to your neighborhood buddies,
"伙计们我在树屋上呢" 嗷
"Hey, fellas! I'm up here in the tree house!" Uhh!
得修一修这个地板
Fix that... board.
做不来啊
I can't do this.
你火什么火
Why are you so frustrated?
因为从来就没有什么困难需要我克服
Because I've never had any obstacles to overcome.
亲爱的可不是这样的
Oh, honey, that's not true.
是吗举个例
Really? Name one.
你有乳糖不耐受症
You're lactose-intolerant.
哦 "亲爱的大学奶酪让我屁多多
Oh, "Dear college, cheese makes me gassy.
9月见"
See you in September."
亲爱的你该不会把"亲爱的大学"作为
Sweetie, you're not really starting your essays
你论文的开头吧
"Dear college," Are you?
那又怎么了
What difference does it make?
我活在你们的庇护下日子无聊而苦逼
I've lived a boring, sheltered, pathetic life.
让你日子过得太滋润了真是对不起啊
I am sorry we have made things too easy and comfortable for you.
你应该道歉都是你的错
Oh, you should be! It is all your fault!
你老是护着我
You have shielded me
任何有趣和危险的事情都不让我去干
from everything interesting and dangerous!
你是在指责我
You are blaming me
保护你不受伤害吗
because I kept you from getting hurt?
加布的妈妈是收藏癖
Gaby's mom's a hoarder.
她写论文就毫无障碍
That essay practically writes itself.
可能是我们的错
Maybe it is our fault.
但是你有没有想过原因
But did you ever consider there's a reason?
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
我们对你那么娇惯是有原因的
There's a reason why we were so easy on you.
我迷糊了
I don't understand.
亲爱的你已经不小了
Oh, honey, you're old enough now.
什么不小了
Old enough for what?
该告诉你真♥相♥了
The truth.
跟我来给你看样东西
Okay, come on. Gotta show you somethin'.
我们要开车去
We're gonna go for a ride.
妈跟我说就是了嘛
Mom, just tell me.
你是我亲妈对吧
You are my mom, right?
我是个坏人
I'm a bad man.
哦不你吃啥了
Oh, no. What did you eat?
米奇尔记得昨天晚上那女孩吗
Mitchell, remember the girl I met last night?
终身难忘啊
How can I forget her?
她的"辨基能力"全世界倒数第一
She's super famous for having the world's worst gay-dar.
我怎么能无视她的感情呢
How could I be so cavalier with her emotions?
你知道我们心有灵犀
You know, we had a real connection.
她把电♥话♥给了我
She gave me her number,
现在她很可能坐在电♥话♥旁边
And right now she's probably sitting by the phone
等我的电♥话♥
waiting for me to call.
我觉得你不懂我让她多着迷
I don't think you understand how charmed she was by me.
老天你这自信从哪里来的
Oh, my god. Where did you get all this self-confidence?
1974年的杰斯珀集市会上我赢得了最可爱宝宝奖
I won cutest baby at the 1974 Jasper County Fair.
那时人们说我像嘉小宝
People at the time said I could go Gerber.
[嘉小宝:著名婴儿用品嘉宝公♥司♥的卡♥通♥形象]
我决定了我要打电♥话♥给她
You know what? I'm calling her.
什么
What?
不行我不能一直拖着
No, I can't carry this around.
我得跟她说实话让她放下我
I have to come clean so she can move on with her life.
这太疯狂了人家才不会等
This is crazy. She is not waiting--
嘿凯蒂我是小卡
Hi. Katie. It's Cam.
电♥话♥一响她就接了
First ring.
我也很期待打电♥话♥给你
I was hoping I would call, too.
真顺啊
Oh, smooth.
昨晚我有些事没有说
So listen, I forgot to mention something last night,
我不知道该如何说起
and I'm--I'm actually not really quite sure how to say this.
我是个同志
I'm a gay guy.
其实是个比较微妙的话题
Um, it's actually somewhat delicate.
[Delicate 一词多意微妙娇柔]
就像我一样娇柔因为我是同志
As am I, on account of the gay.
不凯蒂那天我也聊得很愉快
No, no, I had a great time with you, too, Katie.
只是只是
It's--well, it's just that--
-我对妹子不敢兴趣 -不你坐下来
- I don't dig the ladies. - No, no. And I want you to sit--
你先在卧榻上坐稳了
I want you to have a seat on a chaise lounge.
想在比赛开始前
Hey, you wanna go out and
出去吃个晚饭吗
grab some dinner before the fight tonight?
不用多谢了
No, thank you.
想在家里自己开伙吗
Wanna eat at home?
我来烤点牛排开瓶小酒
I'll grill some steaks, open a bottle of wine.
随你便我晚上要出去
Whatever you want, because I'm not going to be here.
她要出去跳莎莎舞居然不带我
She's going Salsa Dancing without me.
曼尼我说了那俱乐部得年满21岁才能进
Ay, Manny, I told you, it's a 21 and over club.
小学生禁入的舞所才散发致命的诱惑
A forbidden dance floor. Only makes me want it more.
等一下你要同"小短"和达琳去跳舞吗
Wait a second. You're going dancing with Shorty and Darlene?
没错虽然他和你年纪一样大
Yes, because even though he's old like you,
可他仍然喜欢出去找乐子
he still likes to have fun.
我们也喜欢找乐子啊
We like to have fun.
上周我还带你去吃晚饭了呢
Last week I took you to dinner,
还看了船展
went to the boat show,
还品尝了冰冻果子露
got some sherbet?
结果一艘船也没买♥♥ 才8点半就回家了
And we were home by 8:30 with no boat.
你想要我怎么做我不喜欢跳舞
What do you want from me? I don't like dancing.
-我还不喜欢果子露呢 -是吗
- I don't like sherbet. - Yeah, right.
那椰子呢
How about coconut?
谁不喜欢椰子啊谁谁啊
Who doesn't like the coconut, hmm? Who?
不管你去不去反正我要去跳舞
And anyways, I'm going dancing with or without you.
行我祝你和"小短"玩得愉快
Fine. I hope you have a good time with Shorty.
我才不要和"小短"跳
I don't need Shorty!
我随便找个舞伴简直手到擒来
I won't have any problem finding a partner on my own!
妈你又戳到我的痛处了
Wow. Way to rub it in, mom.
谈得如何啊爱情杀手
How'd it go, heartbreaker?
她真是个优雅的女士
That is one classy lady...
-所以我对她开不了口 -啥
- Which is why I couldn't tell her. - What?
我没法在电♥话♥上说这事
Well... I just couldn't do it on the phone.
她接到我的电♥话♥时那么开心
She seemed so excited to hear from me,