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Modern Family S03E06

Part 4 Dec. 3, 2019, 11:18 a.m.

哇真的吗
Wow. Really?
不是只是很震惊啊
No, it's just a shock, is all.
杰
Jay?
这么说西莉亚怀着法官的孩子
So Celia's carrying the judge's baby.
怪不得她开枪射他孕期狂躁
No wonder she shot him. She's hormonal.
-你跟谁打电♥话♥呢 -管家而已
- Who are you talking to? -The housekeeper.
玛利亚我得挂了多谢剧透
Maria, I've gotta go. Thanks a lot.
杰我想让你和曼尼谈谈
Jay, I need you to talk to manny.
-怎么了 -他如果真在干♥你♥说的那事
- What? - Well, if he's doing what you think he's doing,
那他需要和一个男人谈谈
Then he needs to talk to a man.
我不想让他感到难堪啊
I don't want him to be ashame of anything.
那么你就不应该让我去
Then you don't want to send me in there.
是啊但如果他有什么疑问呢
Yeah, but what if-- if he has questions?
如果他不知道该怎么
What if he doesn't know how to--
歌♥洛莉亚不论他在经历什么
Gloria, Gloria, whatever he's going through,
他都能自己领悟的
he can work it out himself.
救命我卡住了
Help! I'm stuck!
不杰快去我求你了
Ay, no, Jay, go. I beg of you!
-快走快走 -歌♥洛莉亚
- Go! Go! Go! - Gloria.
我真不愿做这事儿
I'm extremely reluctant to do this.
拜托快点啦
Please hurry!
不行这是"妇女不宜"内容
Ay, no. I cannot look at this.
搞什么啊
What the hell?
我下不来了杰
I can't get down, Jay.
怎么了曼尼出什么事了
What? What happened to Manny?!
-快告诉我出什么事了啊 -歌♥洛莉亚
-Ay, somebody say something to me! -Gloria,
没事
It's okay.
进来吧
Come on in.
好的
Okay.
他刚才倒挂在这横梁上了
He was hanging from that bar up there.
啥为什么啊你头上戴的什么东西
What? Why? What do you have on your head?
加重头盔通过伸展身体来让我长高
It's a weighted helmet to stretch me so I can get taller.
曼尼你为什么非要长高啊
Manny! Why do you have to get tall now?
为了爱情妈妈还会为什么
Love, mom. Why else?
我的贝拉跟德克斯跑了
I lost Bella to Durkus because,
按她的话说就是"人家好高啊"
in her words, "He's tall."
班里的同学都越长越高除了我
Everybody else is getting taller but me.
你觉得这是咖啡惹的祸吗
You think it's the coffee?
不是
No.
有可能但是
Maybe. But--
可是你这样"倒挂金钟"也是做无用功啊
But hanging downside up is not gonna help you.
网上说可以的
The web site said it would.
听着曼尼
Listen, manny,
你已经集美貌智慧风趣于一身了
You're already intelligent and beautiful and funny.
如果你再长高点你就过于完美了
If you get tall, you're going to have everything,
其他那些歪瓜裂枣
And those poor boys
怎么再和你相提并论呢
Are not gonna have anything to compete with you.
看看这
Look at this.
你头上都有个伤痕了
You have a mark on your head now.
我给你拿些冰来好不好
I'm gonna go get you some ice, okay?
话倒挺好听的可我明天怎么办啊
That's a lot of pretty words, but they don't help me tomorrow.
抱歉孩子都浮云而已
Sorry, kid. It's just one of those things.
该长高时候自然就会长高
You get taller when you get taller.
你应该睡觉了吧
Why don't you get ready for bed?
老天
Ah, jeez.
我像你这么大的时候
You know, when I was your age,
我靠健身来吸引女生
I started working out to get the girls.
你觉得有用吗
You think that would help?
没错明天我们一起去健身
Yeah. So tomorrow, we start working out.
好不好
Okay?
要不然我来给你做几个引体向上
Maybe I'll even show you a few pull-ups
就在这玩意上面
On, uh, this bad boy here, huh?
你看见没
You see that?
过不了多久你也能这么壮
Pretty soon, that's how strong... you're gonna be.
-谢了妈妈 -嘘
- Thanks, mom. - Shh!
-我不想让他们知道我在这 -好的
- I don't want them to know I was here. - Okay.
克莱尔我就知道是你
Oh, Claire, I thought that was you.
谢天谢地快进来
Thank god. Come in.
不行因为我病了记得不抱歉
I can't. 'cause I'm sick, remember? Sorry.
其实我DVD机坏了
Well, my DVD player just broke,
我们都没看到《乱世佳人》的结局是什么
and none of us know how "Gone With the Wind" Ends.
但你看过对吧
But you saw it, right?
-是克莱尔吗 -是
- Oh, is that Claire? - Yeah.
能告诉我们结局吗
Can you tell us what happened?
我能但我不想给你们剧透啊
I could, but I don't want to ruin it for you.
不会我们真的想知道我们真的想
No, we really need to know. We need to know.
克莱尔快告诉我们吧
Claire. Just tell us. -Um...
郝思嘉真的很生克拉克·盖博的气
Scarlett is... really mad at Clark Gable
因为他说了很多不好听的话
Because, um, he says so many bad things.
是不是还把一农场什么的给点了
And didn't he, um, burn down a farm or something?
克莱尔你是不是醉了
Claire, have you been drinking?
我喝了点苏格兰热托地喉咙有点不舒服
I had a hot toddy. Made one for my throat.
[苏格兰热托地:一种暖身的酒精饮料]
晚上卧床的话你这也穿的太光鲜了吧
Pretty dressed up for a night in bed, right?
我只是随手拿了件衣服穿
Yeah, I-I just threw on the first thing I could find...
卢克打电♥话♥来时正好那件就在椅子上
when Luke called, and it was just right there on the chair.
看她手上还盖着章呢
She has a stamp on her hand.
好吧
Okay. All right.
在大家点亮火把群起而捉奸之前
Before we bust out the pitchforks and the torches,
可别忘了
May I remind you
我曾经帮你们把孩子都送回家
that I've driven every one of your children home
还急救过至少一个贝瑟妮
and heimliched at least one, Bethenny.
-大家好 -你好
- Hi. - Hello.
说来尴尬我能借用下洗手间吗
This is totally inappropriate. But could I use your bathroom?
抱歉你一直灌我喝酒
Sorry. You kept pushing the drinks.
他是我朋友同志朋友
I--friend. Gay friend. Gay.
-我不是同志 -你必须得是
- I-I'm not gay. -Yes, you are.
我不是同志我只是法国人
I-I'm not gay. I'm--I'm french.
你以为我是同志
You thought I was gay?
-你是认真的吗 -你对我是"认真的"吗
- Are you serious right now? - Well, are you?
你整晚都在投怀送抱
You've been throwing yourself at me all night.
哪有我才没有呢
No, no. No, I have not.
-贝瑟妮拿葡萄酒来有好戏看了 -贝瑟妮别听她的
- Bethenny, grab the pinot. - Bethenny, do not grab the pinot.
你在我面前脱衣服还捏我的手臂
You undressed in front of me. You squeezed my arm.
你还让我替你按♥摩♥ 那些都算什么
You asked me for a massage. What was all that?
那时我以为你是个同志
That was--that was me safely objectifying a gay person.
天哪克莱尔
Wow, Claire!
当时我在年鉴里写"永远别变"
When I wrote "Don't ever change" in your yearbook,
可不是这个意思啊
I didn't mean it like this.
放轻松霍丽
Oh, ease up, Holly.
我是撒谎了
Okay, I lied.
我是撒谎了我好不容易得到个自♥由♥之夜
I lied, but I get one night to myself,
我只想和风趣的同志朋友纵情欢乐
and I just wanted to spend it with some fun gay people.
这人决定变直又不是我的错
It's not my fault this one decided to be straight.
我从来就是直的
I've always been straight.
你没资格说话
Oh, you don't get to talk!
我居然还向你咨♥询♥了时尚观点
I took fashion advice from you!
天哪我穿这身衣服好看吗
Oh, my god. Do I even look good in this dress?
不绝不问你了
No. Not you.
太短了是吧
It's really short, isn't it?
的确
It's short.
是啊
Yeah.
求你了
Please?
求你了就听我说几句
Please, just listen to me for one second.
离我远点别跟着我
Go away! Stop following me!
能告诉我为何要骚扰这位女士吗
Hey, you wanna tell me why you're bothering this young lady?
不是的警官这是我女儿快告诉他
Oh, no, no, no, no. Officer, this is my daughter. Tell him.
今晚我根本不认识你
Tonight, I don't know who you are.
她是在开玩笑
She's... she's joking.
我可不是危险人物
I'm not dangerous.
实际上我还曾帮这条小路装过灯泡呢