神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S05E12

Part 3 Oct. 1, 2020, 12:22 p.m.

Then, Nikki opens up about hers.
然后呢Nikki会开始谈论她自己的
Yeah, this is the problem. I suck at gossiping.
这就是关键问题我不会八卦啊
Which is why I brought along a specialist.
所以我带来了一个专家
Gina will be in your ear feeding you stories.
Gina会通过通讯器给你提供故事情节
I will be basing Gabriella on my sister's friend, Dana.
我会用我妹妹的朋友Dana的经历给Gabriella编故事
Just be warned... Dana real sloppy.
事先警告一下 Dana真的一团糟
So, Nikki, I always wanted to get my hair cut here.
Nikki 我一直想在这儿剪头发
Everyone says you're the best.
大家都说你手艺最好
Oh, my God, I love your earrings.
啊天我喜欢你的耳饰
Where did you get those hoops?
你在哪儿买♥♥的这些耳环
Mmm, I don't know.
呃不知道
Oh no, Nikki's not a talker. We're screwed.
糟了 Nikki不爱说话我们玩完了
Don't worry angel, Gina's got this, crackety-crack.
小天使不要担心有Gina在呢热个身
Rosa, repeat after me and don't change a thing.
Rosa 按我说的复述一个字都不要改
Can I tell you the craziest story?
我能跟你说点儿特疯的事儿吗
One time I was like so drunk...
有一次我喝得烂醉
And this meathead comes up to me.
然后有个傻♥逼♥过来了
And his body is hot, but his face is like okay.
他身材棒到不行但是脸就很一般了
So I'm like, what?
所以呢我就啥玩意啊
And I was like, bitch, I'm not gonna sleep with you
我就这样小婊♥子♥ 我可不会就这么跟你睡觉
just because you promised to take me to the Bahamas.
就凭你嘴上说说要带我去巴哈马
Take me to the Bahamas first
先带我去巴哈马
and then we'll see what happens, okay?
然后我们看看会发生点啥如何
I was only with him because he drove a Jaguar.
我跟他在一起纯粹因为他开了辆捷豹
Turns out it was a Mercury
结果发现那就是辆水星
with a Thundercat taped to the hood.
在引擎盖上贴了个雷猫
And that relationship lasted for three months.
那段关系持续了三个月
I don't know why we broke up.
我不知道为什么分手了
I guess we just grew apart when he went to prison for life.
可能是他被判了终身监禁后渐行渐远了
I hear that.
我懂
The guy I'm seeing is into some shady stuff.
我约会的那人卷进一些见不得光的事儿里了
Right?
是吗
There it is, the breakthrough. Follow up, follow up!
就是这个突破口跟上话跟上话
So, how'd you guys meet?
那你们是怎么认识的
That's a funny story, for next time.
挺有意思的下次说吧
You're all done, and you look hot, girl.
已经剪好了简直是个尤物啊姑娘
No, no, she was opening up.
不不不她都要开始聊了
Rosa, figure out a way to stay in that chair.
Rosa 想办法继续坐在那儿
Hey, Nikki, I was just wondering.
嘿 Nikki 我在想
How do you think I would look...
你觉得要是
as a blonde?
我染个金发怎么样
Like a Danielle Steele novel.
就像丹尼尔·斯蒂尔小说里的女主那样
Good oranges, nice and dry. Not at all ripe.
好吃的桔子好吃干爽没完全熟透
Fascinating. My orange is beginning to rot.
有趣我的桔子开始烂了
That happens when you leave an orange
你让一个桔子一直无所事事的呆着
sitting around for too long
它就肯定会烂掉
and refuse to even let that orange go to a library for two hours
你甚至不让那个小桔子去图书馆待两个小时
so it can feel like a real orange again.
那样它会觉得自己又是个真正的桔子了
You know what really causes an orange to go bad?
你知道让桔子腐烂的真正原因是啥吗
Getting shot. Have you seen what a bullet does to an orange?
被枪打中你见过子弹能把桔子造成什么样吗
I shot a watermelon once.
我打过西瓜
It's exactly what you want it to be.
就是你想看到的那样儿
I miss Amy. You think I enjoy doing this?
我想Amy了你觉得我很享受这样做吗
I assure you, I do not.
我跟你保证我没有
I'm simply trying to keep my husband alive.
我就是想让我丈夫活着
Well, you may not have a husband when all of this is over.
得等着一切完事之后你可能会失去这个丈夫
You're not going to die, Kevin.
你不会死的 Kevin
That's not what I meant.
我不是这意思
I'm leaving. This is an absurd conversation,
我要走了这谈话太可笑了
and you're being ridiculous.
而且你简直无理取闹
You know what, screw this. We need a break.
你知道吗去他的吧我们得喘口气
I'm a cop, I can protect us. We're going to the library.
我是个警♥察♥ 我能保护好我们我们这就去图书馆
These two oranges are stepping out.
这两个小桔子要出门了
Oh, damn it, peeling out. It was right there!
我去是要剥皮了这梗就在那儿
Okay, Captain Holt has back-to-back meetings
好 Holt警监今天在警局大楼
at One Police Plaza today,
连轴开会
which means we have a four-hour window
也就说在他检查任何一个监控录像前
before he checks on any of the security feeds.
我们有四个小时的时间
But going out into public is a huge risk,
但是去公共场所危机重重
so maybe let's go over some self-defense techniques.
所以我们得温习一下自卫技巧
Usually, you warn somebody before you do that.
通常你在做这个之前要提醒人家一下
Raymond told me that the element of surprise was crucial.
Raymond跟我说出其不意至关重要
Cool.
很好
So he's a great teacher. But I will say this.
他是个很好的老师但是我得说
If you're going to do a throat punch,
如果你想要来个一拳锁喉
it is key that you say something cool afterwards
出拳后的狠话是关键
like, "Choke on that."
比如你可以说 "一拳窒息"
But they're not choking. They're experiencing airway trauma.
但是他们并没有窒息而是呼吸管损伤
Ooh, how about,
噢这么说怎么样
"Better get some corticosteroids to treat that laryngeal fracture."
"最好去搞点糖皮质激素去治你的呼吸管破裂吧"
Okay, yeah, that's very informative
好吧这样说很有解释性
and quite polite.
而且很礼貌
But maybe add a "Dirtbag" On the end?
但是在最后加个"人♥渣♥(垃圾袋)"怎么样
But a dirtbag is a useful part of a vacuum.
但是对于吸尘器来说垃圾袋是很有用的
I don't see how it's an insult.
我不明白这为什么有侮辱的意味
All right, you know, puncher's choice.
好吧好吧你开心就好
Moving on, we're going to need disguises.
接着说我们需要伪装一下
And since we're going to a public library,
而且既然我们要去公共图书馆
the best way to fit in is as...
最好的伪装就是
Scholars. Weird perverts.
学者古怪变♥态♥
Yes, weird perverts is far better.
说得对伪装成古怪变♥态♥确实好很多
Far better.
好太多了
What is the bandwidth on the wifi here?
这里的WiFi带宽是多少
We have much content to stream.
我们有很多东西需要在线观看
Bam! Solid match. Okay, I've got three words.
砰完全匹配好了我已经找到三个字了
I've got an "And", I've got an "An" And a "He".
我找到了"和" "一" "他"
Now, the "He" Could be a part of a "The"
"he"可能是"the"的一部分
or the end of "Apache."
或者也可能是"apache"(阿帕切族)的结尾
I don't know why, but I'm getting a strong "Apache" Vibe.
不知道为什么但是我觉得更可能是指阿帕切族
Amy? Amy?
Amy Amy
Amy, where'd you go? Down here.
Amy 你跑哪儿去了我在这儿
I let the pile take me.
我让这堆碎纸把我吞噬了
I don't know what I was thinking.
我不知道我当时在想什么
We've been at it for two hours
我们已经找了两个小时了
and all we've got is three words.
但却才找到了三个字
Really two. Terry's just fooling himself.
其实只有两个字 Terry只是在自欺欺人
"Apache" is a long shot at best.
指"阿帕切族"这意思的几率太小了
Ooh, are you guys building a nap nest?
噢你们是在做午睡小窝吗
Mind if we burrow? No!
我们可以钻进来吗不行
We're piecing together shredded documents to find Seamus Murphy.
我们想把切碎的文件拼凑起来去找Seamus Murphy
Can I help?
那我可以帮忙吗
I'm really good at jigsaw puzzles. I do them all the time.
我很擅长拼图的我经常玩儿
It's why my wrist muscles are so defined.
所以我的手腕肌肉线条才如此轮廓分明
No offense, Scully,
Scully 无意冒犯
but you can't be good or bad at jigsaw puzzles.
但是拼图没有什么擅长不擅长的
It's just putting shapes together.
这就是把东西按形状拼起来
There's no strategy or reasoning, or logic...
没有策略没有理由也没有逻辑
Look, I got half a page!
看我拼好半页了
He is the one.
他就是不二人选啊
This is great. There's nobody here.
太好了这里没人
Everyone cleared out as soon as we got here.
看到我们来了其他人都走完了
Even that actual pervert was creeped out by us.
我们甚至把那个真正的变♥态♥都给吓跑了
I can feel your heat.
我能感受到你的温度
Ooh! No offense, but it feels so good
噢别往心里去但这真是太好了
to breathe air that didn't come out of your mouth.
能够呼吸到不是从你嘴里冒出来的空气
None taken. Ooh, I know you're working,
没关系我知道你在工作
but you should probably put something on your screen perverted
但是你最好还是把电脑桌面换成变♥态♥点的图片吧
in case someone comes in
因为万一有人走进来了
like a lady in high heels stepping on a businessman.
比如一个穿高跟鞋的女人踩在一个商人身上
Sorry, yes, I meant to do that.
不好意思我是打算换个桌面的